2007

Wet Sands Archives 2007 - My Thoughts as I Knew Them, a diary of Sandra Lynn

January 9, 2007 - I will update this thing soon, but until then, some nice guy in Toronto posted some video from the WMU Bronco Marching Band on YouTube!  Woot.  My daughter is in there!   I am so proud! 

January 11, 2007 - I'm gonna update this morning if it kills me.   (...I still have a pulse, so this is going well...)

Yesterday, I drove for 3.5 miles down a stretch of road with my left blinker on.  Once I saw it was on, I laughed.  "I'm old now for sure!" I proclaimed to myself, but at least now I know why one leaves their blinker on by accident as you get older...it's because you are rocking out to some song on the radio from your glory days and you accidentally turn it on with your wild hand movements and the music is so loud you can't hear it blinking! 

I walked into the work the other morning singing.  It is normal for me to be singing.  I sing all the time.   There is always a song in my head and if you know me well, if it's in my head it's coming out for public review.  Events remind me of songs or a statement I hear reminds me of a song...everything reminds me of songs.  However, this time I walk in to work singing, "Jump down, turn around, pick a bale of cotton...jump down turn around, pick a bale of hay.  Oh Lordy!  Pick a bale of cotton..."   When I got to the "Oh, Lordy!" part I slapped my hand over my mouth.  I was ashamed of myself.  No doubt some people would find that song offensive in our politically correct sue-you-just -for-breathing world.  After being shocked at myself, my thought was, "Where did that song come from in my head?  What cell happened to throw that out there at that time and why?"  My second thought was, "Man, that song doesn't get much airplay anymore, I bet..." I giggled at myself and ran in and told Doug what I had done.   Doug and I are old enough to remember being taught that song in elementary school.   I personally had to do exercises to it in gym class.  Even when I was little, I recall no racist association with that song.  I believe it was called a folk song then.  Still, if my grandparents and great grandparents were ripped from their homes, dragged across the ocean, and forced to do slave labor for the stupid white race with no choice in the matter as they were whipped and beaten, I would find that song offensive as well.  What amazes me is how the human brain can hold on to something that you yourself think you forgot and didn't even know you still had, then it just throws it out there at random moments.  The human brain amazes me.  Sigh.  (Most humans have the ability to control what they verbally emit from their brains, where Sandy just lets it all hang out.  Sandy is lacking the self restraint gene, obviously.)

My daughter has moved back into her dorm and taken my grandson, Ziti the Beta Fish.  She is back into the swing of classes.  It was so nice having her home.  Her trip to Toronto to the International Bowl was fun for her.  It was a wonderful game towards the end as well.   Very exciting.  Western lost 24 to 27, but boy howdy they came back with a fury in the second half.  I normally only go to/watch football games for the marching band part of it, but watching the game on TV had me screaming loudly at the players.   Before my daughter left for Toronto, I was feeling very frustrated with work and life and things happening in my life, so I had a "fish spasm" and bought Ziti a 5.5 gallon tank and a bubbler and a new in tank covered bridge toy thing and ... I went nuts, actually.  (I now have six cans of different types of fish food sitting around that Ziti never did like, but man - I was gonna try.  He's my first grand child after all.  He only likes the freeze dried tiny shrimp from one brand of food, so I sift through all the flakes just to pick out the itsy bitsy shrimps...)  I dropped my daughter off and came back and set Ziti up in his new digs.  He hated the bubbler.   He cowered in the corner in a fetal position.  I turned that off.  He was happier without the bubbling action.  He did like the covered bridge thingy where he could glide through and hide, I must say, but he was much happier when he was just in the big 2.5 gallon fish bowl.  When I sent my daughter back up to campus I just sent up the fish bowl and covered bridge and I kept the tank.  The tank is now populated with eight little guppy type fish that seem very spastic with no goals in life except to be, well - spastic.  There were nine, but I lost one of the fan tailed guppies yesterday.   (May he flush in peace.)

I suppose having fits of trying to cope with life is better taken out on fish as it's so much better than having panic attacks.  I do not miss the days of having panic attacks.  I do not miss the feeling of choking and the lack of control.  I went from having panic attacks to just putting my jaw out of place (from clenching my jaw so hard when I got stressed.)   Now that I don't do that anymore, I have "fish" attacks...one compulsion to another, aye?

I only gained a half a pound during holiday season!  Yeah.  I lost that an another half a pound this weigh in, and have lost a total of 47 pounds.  My husband is down 55 pounds.  A new session of Weight Watchers starts up next Tuesday, thank goodness.  I like the program.  Easy to follow.  The slow weight loss makes it so you don't have reams of skin hanging off of you.  It rocks.  

I asked my friend Jane to make me ankle warmers.  She suggested leg warmers.  She is a knitting fool.   If it can be knitted, she can knit it.  I look forward to my leg warmers.   I will no doubt start a fashion trend and everyone will be begging for custom leg warmers.  I will be like Paris Hilton of the fashion world, except 130 pounds heavier and minus various dogs crammed in my purse.

I felt so bad - I had emailed one of my Aunts in Kansas to check on her, as I've heard they had snow and I love snow as we all know, and I raved on about loving snow and she should send me snow and they were lucky to get snow, etc.  She wrote back and was very serious and mentioned how many people lost power and lives to that storm, even though they themselves were farther to the east of it and safe and all ... I read her letter and I know my face looked like one of a chastised child.  Sigh.  The views expressed by Sandy in emails are not necessarily those of a greater portion of the United States.  I must learn to sometimes curb my enthusiasm.

Now I'm off to conquer the world and undoubtedly shove my foot in my mouth at every opportunity!  Viva the Human Brain!  Enjoy your day - hug someone.  Smile at the people when you're at a four way stop.  Drink a V8.  (Cripes!  You could have had one!)

January 17, 2007 - HURRAY!!  I've finally reached the 50 pound mark!  WOOT WOOT.  I didn't think I'd be this happy, but I'm HAPPY!  I haven't weighed this "little" since 19aught something!  (Mind you, I'm still a cow, but a skinnier cow and a happier cow - and you know that they say happier cows give better milk, but I fail to see the connection here and I'm digressing...)  I have not been this excited since last week when I got to buy much smaller panty hose.  (The ones I had were coming up to my bottom lip.)

My husband has lost 57 pounds so far as well.  Wow.  I am amazed.  I had not realized what that meant 'til I was laying in bed last night thinking that if I took duct tape and taped five 10 lb. bags of dog food to my mid section that it probably would HURT after a while, carrying all that weight around.  (Not to mention be a terrible fashion statement.)   Holy Crap!  What a concept!  No wonder his feet were nearly dead at one point - the poor toes couldn't hold all that extra weight! 

I am not bragging, mind you.  I am not flaunting this either.  I'm just so happy.  It was not that hard (except for all the near panic attacks from lack of shoving food in my mouth and the hours spinning around in the kitchen going for something to eat that I didn't need, then deciding against it, then talking myself into it again, then stopping myself, then...)   I just can't wait to shop from the 'normal human clothes' racks at the store.   I will need to get something sooner than that, I fear, as I'm losing my skirts.  I have to pull them up right under my boobs just to keep them on during the day, and I don't think the world is quite ready for a Sandy Mooning - at least not yet.

My daughter got a job (small spasm on Mom's part because she is so happy daughter is working) on campus which requires her to be outside at night for six hours handing out parking tickets.  Of course, she starts this job on the first night we actually have winter weather.  The poor dear froze.  She worked last night as well, another cold night.  She will be getting herself some thermal underwear this week and maybe some boots, yes?   Her second semester at college is off to a fairly good start by the sound of it, but then again I'm not the one doing the homework or going to classes.  

My youngest son has a presentation due today on talismans and good luck charms (in relation to the book they read called "The Monkey's Paw" by W.W. Jacobs) so I asked him if he was ready.   "Yes!" he said.  "So, present to your father and me..." I commanded.  "No!" he said.  "Yes!!" I insisted.  (This response from me of course comes with the implication that I will take away the air he breathes if he DOESN'T do what I've asked.)  "Oh, then...I will have to do my note cards then first..." he drawled.  (He had previously stated to us that he was DONE with everything.)  I forced him upstairs to do what was supposed to be done.   He was not happy with me.  I was not happy with him.  He came down a half hour later and did the presentation and was so happy it was DONE that he hugged me.   "Why do you put me through SUCH TORMENT you poop head EVERY TIME you have HOMEWORK?" I asked him.  "I don't know..." he said in a pondering way, as if he really didn't know.  My oldest son said this morning "it's genetic" as he went through the same thing with me during his school years.  In this case the gene they both share is the 'lazy' gene with a little of the 'why do I need to learn this crap?' gene thrown in for good measure.  Sigh.  Only 4 and a half more years of this...

I'm off to conquer the world of plastics.  Viva Life!  Go forth yourself and do good things.

January 18, 2007 - I steam cleaned the carpet Monday night.  It's a beige tan carpet (or was) but with three dogs, five adults, and three cats waltzing about constantly the term 'high traffic dirt areas' take on a whole new meaning.  After cleaning the carpet and bringing most of it back up to a color vaguely reminiscent of beige, I was content.  However, my poor youngest son now follows the dogs around with a damp cloth every time they come in from outside.  "This is why we can't have nice things..." he mutters as he tries to stay on top of the muddy paw prints.

I decided last night that there are only really two pieces of advice I could give (that I am pretty darned sure of) to the youth of America if ever I was asked to give a speech let's say, at a graduation.  

Piece of advice #1 -    Always - ALWAYS - pee more than two times a day.  Oh sure, your youthful bladders THINK you can hold it for 8 hours at a time, but it's not a GOOD thing.  I highly suggest you take time to pee every three hours at the least.   Trust me on this one, it's important.

Piece of advice #2 - Get used to bending down and picking stuff up at a young age.  Don't feel angry that most people are piggies and throw crap all over - just PICK IT UP.  Even if it's one piece of garbage a day, pick it up and toss it in the closest garbage can.  The bending part helps keep you limber and the picking up of the junk keeps you humble.  You can also get to know a lot about humans by doing this, coming to such conclusions as...   "Gee, this person was in such a hurry to go somewhere that they dropped their lunch bag...I bet that person needs a vacation."  "Gee, this person has no regard for the human race.  What a pity!"  Bending over also gives you several of seconds where you can pray for the person throwing garbage all over as well.   We all know we all could use a prayer or two.

This is a picture of my youngest son demonstrating how to sit on a couch.  I found it helpful as I was convinced that one put one's rear down first...

And here are a couple of shots of the ice on the trees here.  We've only gotten ice and a dusting of snow so far.  We've been the lucky ones.  It has, however, been VERY COLD so the ice has lingered on trees and makes for a lovely site during the day when the sun is out.  (I can say that as I've never lost power due to said "lovely site.")

January 19, 2007 - The chiller at work that is responsible for cooling the presses has been emitting some odd sounds lately.  Every time I'm outside of the building and I'm able to hear the sound of it bouncing off the woods that surround the plant (and we all know I'm slowly going deaf, so this is random at best) it just sounds like someone should be looking at it - someone, perhaps, with a license in something related to mechanics.  At first the sound reminded me of my son's car that squeals like a piggy using helium every time he starts it up.  Yesterday it took me a second to identify the sound because that time it reminded me of hyper caffeinated crickets riding the four horses of the apocalypse.   I don't know much about motors, but I truly believe that thing needs a new belt of a good lube job.

My best friend Vickie called me last night.  I love talking to her.  I've tried to explain our relationship before to anyone who will listen, but there are no words for it.  (The kids know when I've talked to Vickie as I'm in the 'Vickie' mood - happy and content, purring like a kitten after warm milk.)  I am convinced that if we were both hit over the head with blunt objects which resulted in life time amnesia, that we'd STILL know each other or at least gravitate to each other by some odd force that is not of this world.   When we both lose out minds to old age and/or residual brain damage from drinking so heavily in our teens that we'll still know each other.  I have been SO BLESSED that way all my life to meet such kindred spirits!  I hope you all know I don't take that gift for granted.  I hope you all know how cool I think you are.

That beginning guitar riff from "Back in Black" by AC/DC has to be one of the most famous guitar 'sounds' of my generation.  Hahaha.  I have heard people who have that for their ring tone on their phone, and NO ONE picks up the phone right away - they just sit and listen to it first, bobbing their heads.  Anyone of my age around to hear that ring tone also wants to hear it loudly ..."Turn it UP!" is always called.  It just makes me laugh how a few notes can stop someone in their tracks.  Maybe we need to blast AC/DC in Iraq?

Suddenly I am so tired this morning.  I could crawl back into bed and hide from the world for a whole day and not even feel bad about it.  Guess I should start moving my tush and getting some energy back.  My tired spurt came after a mental spurt just now.  In a flash of an eye, my brain and I tossed around some thoughts.  "Today is Friday, true - so I should be happy that the end of the week is here, but really - THE END OF THE WEEK IS HERE and face it, my life is passing by at a horrendous rate..."  My brain was kind enough to offer up another tidbit of info..."You know, there won't be any fossil fuel for your kids or their kids.   Good going, breeder!"  "Hey!" I tell my brain, "The pioneers didn't have cars and did just fine!"  "Oh, sure - they rode horses into the sunset and killed off a whole human race of Native Americans!  Cripes, Woman!  The face of the nation will change completely when oil runs out!  Think about it!"  "True, maybe I should start teaching the kids about gardens and how to sew and stuff..."  "Hindsight is marvelous, isn't it?" my brain said in a very sarcastic way.  "I bet Juan Valdez won't even notice when the fossil fuels run out, riding that donkey everywhere in the first place..." my brain added.  "I wonder if after several million years if we will be the new fossil fuel?" I pose to my brain.  "You put out enough methane now - offer yourself up as a alternative fuel source NOW!" my brain laughs, "but seriously, a million years from now the sun will probably have burned out and the human race will be over anyway, so why worry?" 

So do any of you get depressed out of the blue by the fact you gave birth to children that will have to deal with lack of fossil fuels and global warming?  Does this bother anyone but me?   I feel GUILT due to this fact.  Did our parents feel guilt at giving us a world that was turning into a corporate/greedy/Enron lying "feed the rich, screw the poor" environment?  Did their parents feel guilt about giving our parents a world the had motor vehicles and not horses?  (Wait - I see a pattern here...)

There are just some things we can't change or stop from happening.  We can do our part best we can, yes.   Recycle your milk jugs and junk mail.  Pick up trash.  Teach your kids right from wrong.  Breathe in and out.  Brush your teeth if you still got 'em, and hug people.  That's about the best we can do.

January 22, 2007 - Feel free to email me if you see spelling boo boos on this thing.  Spelling has never been my forte in life.  Lately I find more misused words as opposed to spelling errors.   I should offer prizes for people who find them.  I also had a dream last night that one of my high school friends emailed me about my improper use of punctuation.   Why would I spend perfectly good dreaming time on a dream where a person I have not seen in years is criticizing my use of punctuation?!?!  Go figure.  The brain is a powerful and creative organ.  Normally I just back off and let my brain do "it's thing" but on occasions where it forces me to dream very odd things - I question it's motives.  (And if my brain reads this diary, I apologize, but WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?)

The dogs have been barking for 1/2 hour now out the front window.  In their minds I'm sure they believe they've "cornered" that rabbit that is out front eating bird food.  The bunny just eats and stares at them as if to say, "Yeah, Right!"  I tried to get pictures but it being dark out and all they did not show much.  I was after the red glow in the bunny's eyes from the light reflection - that evil bunny look.  When I got up on the couch with the dogs, looking out the window, they put MORE enthusiasm in their barking.  It was quite comical.  From the road I am sure we looked like the opening to 'Petticoat Junction' where the girls are all draped over the side of the water tower. 

I had to email my daughter this morning - for the whole month of January, I've been assuming it's almost the end of the month.  (I know it's because of things I've been doing at work and planning for in February and all, but my poor daughter must think I've lost my mind completely.)   I would assure her that our chiropractor appointment was only a few days away - but in reality it was (at the time) two weeks away.  I have been talking in terms of the end of the month all month.  It dawned on me this morning when I was putting my smiley face on the calendar to mark the days that it was only JANUARY 22nd!  I am not one to rush the passage of time so I will be glad when I come back to this dimension.   Apparently I've found a worm hole in the fabric of time and have been traversing about in some spasmodic fit of DUH. 

My youngest son has the day off today due to 'records day' at school.  He was thrilled about this all weekend.  He has yet to see his chore list for today, however.  We'll see how thrilled he is then.  Nothing like Mom putting a damper on all things fun.   (This is a requirement by law that parents do this.  It's not my fault, I'm just doing my job.)  I think he'll enjoy the 'tour de turd' especially - who would like to clean up dog poopy on such a fine day?  Hopefully it will be easy as they will be frozen and more compact.  He really doesn't have much to complain about, now that I think about it.  I've been doing all the house chores on the weekends to keep from eating in excess.  This whole weight loss things has benefited him to no end...

He's been saving up him money for a Nintendo WII game console or a guitar.  (He's not sure yet which he really wants.)  He asked for money on his birthday and got it.  (Although he also got a ton of Lego stuff as well from his sister because what kid really just wants all money and nothing to open?)  He has been playing with his Legos in my upper bunk bed since Christmas.  There has been more than once I've awaken to the pain of laying on Darth Vader all night firmly wedged in the middle of my back or parts of an Imperial Destroyer impaled on my buttocks.  (How many of your girls can say THAT?) 

January 24, 2007 - I love Valentine's Day.  I know it's a 'fake' holiday, but I do so love the hearts and colors of the whole Valentine thing.  You could call it "Squash a Nematode Day" but still have the hearts and stuff, and I would celebrate it.  I feel a lot of love for mankind in general so I adore the fact I am able to express it with an excuse for a change instead of being classified as "mildly insane and probably dangerous."

My daughter is doing OK on her new job.  I am not sure if she has written a ticket yet, but she at least is working and getting some walking exercise.  They carry a walkie talkie and have to 'phone home' on occasion to the police station.  I asked her if she knew all the codes yet (if they still used codes) and she said she was learning them.  "10-4 means - well, 10-4 after all..." she explained, "...and I think 10-19 means we are headed back to the station."   "What is the code if you need help?" I asked in a worried mother's voice.  "I'm sure there is a code for that, but all they will hear from me if I need help is HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!"  Hahaha.  Last night I was laying in bed worrying about her.  I wondered if she could call if she needed help - what if someone got mad because they got a ticket?  About the time I'm worrying about her and wondering if she could get help in the event she needed it, one of our Nextel phones beeped in the living room.  I flew out of bed.  Turns out it was beeping because the battery was low, but I had to laugh.  See what happens when you worry too much?   I think God intentionally throws stuff like that at you to scare you and make you realize worrying solves nothing. 

Total weight loss so far for me is 52.5 pounds.  Smile.  We were talking about goals and motivation at the last meeting, and I thought to myself "I have no real goals in this weight loss..."  I really don't.  I signed up because Judy asked me and because if something didn't change in my house a certain un-named spouse was going to end up as a rib dinner in a "Fried Green Tomatoes" movie style sort of way and they'd never find his body and you can't ask anyone to change unless YOU are willing to change...but I digress.  I had no 'real' reason up front in my mind, I just 'did it.'  (Staying out of jail for murder was a good reason, yes - but one has to have a continuing reason to stay motivated to be healthy.)  It hit me last night that I would really LOVE to do cartwheels again.  Seriously.  I loved doing cartwheels in my teen age years.   (It took me until my high school days to learn how to do one!)  That is my new goal.  To be fit enough to do cartwheels again.  Sounds silly, but you go get your own motivation;  Cartwheels are now mine!  Feel free to take the 'murder' motivational tool from me.

January 28, 2007 - We finally have SNOW.  It's lake effect snow which I don't count as 'real' snow as much as it is snow by default, but still - it's SNOWING.  The image below shows how the some of the bigger snow bands coming off of Lake Michigan swirl down and right over to us.   (I added the highly technical red lines, although who could tell as they were so professionally done!)  They upgraded our lake effect snow advisory to a warning now.  

I found out it snowed while I slept last night when I let the puppies out to potty this morning.  The door cut a swath in the snow and the dogs were THRILLED.  They romped and played and threw it around, plus it's coming down quite hard so by the time they came in (which they were reluctant to do) they were covered head to tail.  The best part is that they IMMEDIATELY went upstairs to tell my boys that there was snow and share the joy by shaking off all over their sleeping selves.  Smile.  Dogs rock!

There is a Kitty Bed and Breakfast down the road from where I work.  (You can board your cats there while you are vacation.)  After Christmas up until just recently they had a sign out front that said "50% OFF  ALE" and every night on the way home I couldn't figure out why they weren't busier.  Normally ale brings people in like moths to a light. 

I ground coffee for the first time yesterday.  I got that huge food processor for Christmas and have been experimenting with it when I have time.  There is a special attachment for chopping things, and it works very well.  I made a pot of coffee after pummeling the coffee beans into submission.  I felt so - so - sophisticated.  (It doesn't take much to amuse me.  I'm a cheap date.)

There were two squirrel ghettos in the roof of our house that my husband broke up.  They were living in the rotting part of some wood in both front and back and he got sick of the constant traffic on the roof so he pulled down the rotting wood a while back.  Tens of squirrels scuttled away.  I don't know where they moved to, but they still use the roof as a spring board to the bird feeders.  Stewie hates the squirrels and watches them while snotting up my front window.  He emits odd sounds that I can't even describe when he sees the squirrels sliding down off the roof onto the air conditioner or awning, then bouncing to the ground under the bird feeders.  The dogs are not so bothered by the squirrels as the are the devil rabbits.  There is something for everyone at my house.   We are an equal opportunity critter castle.

I had a terrible binge fit last night - food wise.  I feel terrible this morning.  I didn't binge like the old days - where I would consume a whole bag of something for six millions calories then go back for more, but still - I ate more than I should have.  A food hangover reminds me of beer hangovers from my drinking days.  Sigh.  I wasn't hungry, yet I ate.   I didn't even argue with myself - I knew I was going to binge and sat back and let myself do it.  "You'll regret this!" I told myself.  "I know!   I know!" I said back with a mouthful.  My husband subtly reminded me of what I was doing by looking at me and saying in a kind voice, "Do you know what you are doing?"  He didn't stop me but he made me aware, although at the time I was cramming things into my mouth I was fully aware of what I was doing.

Last night I finally decided to go through some things that were given to me after my Uncle Harold died.   They were things that belonged to my Aunt Vera such as her and Harold's wedding rings.  I have not touched them since I got them as I couldn't bring myself to do it.   I loved Vera more than a mother.  She was like a dear friend.  She died suddenly on September 1, 1994.  Sigh.  The book from her funeral was included in the stuff.  I read through it - all the names of people who signed the book.  I honestly don't remember much about the funeral in general.  I don't remember my Mom being there with us or my husband and son.  (They were there - they all signed the book.)  I was in shock from the moment I got the call that she had died.   I have never cried so hard and so completely - sucking in air and practically shrieking.  I don't remember my 'brother' Ken there with his wife.  I don't remember much about it at all except that she was in a blue fluffy dress I doubt she would have liked and the preacher was my Uncle's brother, and he preached a sermon that condemned her to hell.  I was so paralyzed with shock I couldn't get up and talk when they asked if anyone wanted to share memories.  I had so many - I needed to tell them all about Vera...that part I remember, but I couldn't move.  I wanted to shriek, "How dare you!" but I couldn't move.  I miss Vera.  In my teens, she was one of the strong women who 'saved' me as it were.  I used to spend many breaks from school up at her house.  One Christmas when I was there, I was acting quite cocky as teenagers do.  She taught me a lesson that year.  "Don't get cocky" was the lesson.  She knew I was terrified of flying.  She used the snow storm at the time as and excuse for not taking me home by car.  She sent me home on an airplane.  On New Year's Eve I was the only passenger on a flight that went from Flint to Detroit back to Kalamazoo...barely.  They almost grounded us in Detroit.  The only thing I remember about that plane ride except I was terrified and it was dark out was that the stewardess' were complaining that they needed to get to Chicago to go to a New Years Eve party.  "I have a new dress!" I remember one lady lamenting.  I didn't get cocky with Vera after that, at least not until I was an adult with a child of my own.  Smile.  I miss Vera, but I'm grateful I had her in my life.  I hope I leave an impression as strong on someone's life as she did with me.  I hope I'm good enough material for stories around the kitchen table long after I'm gone.

January 30, 2007 - We are under a Lake Effect Snow Warning until seven p.m. tonight.  This is the actual text of the warning: 

...LAKE EFFECT SNOW WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 7 PM EST THIS
EVENING...

A LAKE EFFECT SNOW WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 7 PM EST THIS
EVENING.

LAKE EFFECT SNOW SHOWERS WILL CONTINUE TO DEVELOP THIS MORNING AND
AFTERNOON. ADDITIONAL SNOW ACCUMULATIONS OF 2 TO 5 INCHES ARE
LIKELY TODAY. THIS WILL BRING STORM TOTAL SNOWFALL BY 7 PM TUESDAY
INTO THE 8 TO 12 INCH RANGE WITH LOCALLY HIGHER AMOUNTS EXPECTED.

A LAKE EFFECT SNOW WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF LAKE-
EFFECT SNOW ARE FORECAST THAT WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR
IMPOSSIBLE. LAKE-EFFECT SNOW SHOWERS TYPICALLY ALIGN THEMSELVES
IN BANDS AND WILL LIKELY BE INTENSE ENOUGH TO DROP 1 TO SEVERAL
INCHES OF SNOW PER HOUR FOR SEVERAL HOURS. VISIBILITIES VARY
GREATLY AND CAN DROP TO ZERO WITHIN MINUTES. TRAVEL IS STRONGLY
DISCOURAGED. COMMERCE COULD BE SEVERELY IMPACTED. IF YOU MUST
TRAVEL...KEEP AN EXTRA FLASHLIGHT...FOOD...AND WATER IN YOUR
VEHICLE IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY.

I post this only for historical purposes for my kids years from now.  It won't happen - NOTHING the weather peeps have predicted around my general area has happened...but it COULD and isn't it the thought that matters?  The lake shore communities have gotten hit hard, but that is the case when you live next to an immense lake. 

The 40 pounds bag of bird food I purchased in September is finally getting used up at least.  The cardinals and titmouse's and all sparrows and mourning doves and woodpeckers and all chowing down with the evil devil rabbits and squirrels.  By the foot prints out there, apparently the deer have also found the feeding spot.

So Muffy the Grand Alpha King Male of all cats in my house has a barfing issue.  He will eat and eat dry cat food, apparently not chewing it by the looks of it, and choose random spots in which to barf.  This morning the alarm went off and I flew out of bed to turn it off and was aided in my travel by a pile of cat puke.  It's amazing how much speed one can pick up when lubricated properly.  Muffy doesn't act sick - he acts quite haughty and normal.  I hope it's just because he's been indoors a lot and hasn't been out doing his manly cat things that makes him puke.  If I was used to a steady diet of mice and moles and various plant life, then was forced to stay in due to the weather and eat nothing but processed cat food, I'd puke too.  Here is a picture of Muffy in a box.   Muffy will get into any box, no matter the size.  He's almost 20 lbs. worth of cat.  He doesn't fit in most small boxes...just don't tell him that.  (This particular shoe box he busted out the one end to make room for his buttocks.)

If you are the mother of a teenaged male and ever wonder why their t-shirts are all stretched out, you may have a secret ninja in the house and not know it.  I found this picture of my son on his 'myspace' page and NOW I know why his t-shirts are all stretched. 

Ah, Youth...for some odd reason I feel safer now, knowing I'm protected at night by ninjas... 

January 31, 2007 - After all the fuss and fighting with my youngest Ninja during December and this month to get his grades back up, the report card came in the mail and reported that he had all As and Bs.   He was as shocked as his father and I were!  "Woah!  How did THAT happen?!!" he proclaimed.  We are proud of the little turd head for pulling the English grade out of the toilet as it were.  (But if he thinks that will make Mom ease up on him to study and do homework and the like, that Ninja's got another thing coming!)

Tis the last day of the month.  You tell me where the time went...yesterday was weigh in for WW and I gained a pound and a quarter.  Geez!  I knew I would with all the bingeing over the weekend.  You eat - you pay.  So now I have only lost 51 pounds technically.   You have to eat 4500 calories more than normal to gain a pound and a half.  I know I didn't do that bad!!  Must be some is water weight gain or lack of crapping.   (Gotta blame it on something other than the fact I shoved half of the food in the kitchen down my throat.)  I don't ever want to go back EVER to the fat the encircled my mid section.  NEVER.  I feel so much better now without it there.  I don't care how I look - I just know I FEEL BETTER!  This little weight gain scared me into getting back on track, though.  Seriously, when you were as big as I was you think, "Oh, yeah - I'm fine.  I feel OK.  I don't care how I look, so as long as I feel OK..."  The catch here is that you don't know you DON'T feel OK until you lose weight and feel better, then you know that how you felt wasn't OK, Okay?  (This was all typed in the verbal accent of Pepe the King Prawn Shrimp from the Muppets Show, Okay?  I adore that guy, Okay?)

Every morning at this time in the day, I scream at my youngest son in the shower, "Watch your time!!"   I do this because he always pushes it to the limit.  "Watch your time!"  "I know, Mom!"  If he knew, then why isn't he out of the bathroom yet?  Does he want to miss the bus?  Geez.   Since I have said this so many times in the care and feeding of three teenagers over the years, will that become something embedded in my genetic structure?  Will my grandchildren's grandkids burst forth and scream "WATCH YOUR TIME!!" without control just because it's an embedded instinct?  I wish I could be around to see that should it happen;  a form of genetic Tourettes as it were.

I got a notice I have jury duty in March!  All the other times I was summoned for jury duty, I had just had a kid.  I think they thought it was safe now as I'm not nursing anything.  I have never served on a jury.  This will be interesting.  I filled out my questionnaire and will send it in today.  It says "one day or one trial..." and you know with my luck it will turn out to be a six month trial...

February 2, 2007 - Happy Groundhog Day.  Happy February in general.  It took me years to learn how to spell February...a little trivia for you.   I still can't spell it without saying it out loud.  (...and most likely I have my my tongue hanging out right now as I type...)

Last night I had dinner with three of my girlfriends from High School.  We try to have dinner every couple of months.  It's always a hoot.  Everyone should grab a friend and go to dinner and just gab for an hour or so about nothing in particular.  I love it because when we get together we're the ONLY ONES in the restaurant.  (Restaurant - another word that won't stick in my brain and I have to spell check every time.)  We aren't really the only ones there but it feels like it.  We get loud and laugh.  It's great. We are NOT vile in any way (with the exception of me as I tend to say exactly what is in my head so there are times an ooze of verbal vile comes out) but we have fun and we laugh.  There have been times people have moved away from us because we all laugh with gusto and with four women talking at once, we might get a tad louder than the average table of diners.  I started plopping out kids much sooner than my friends did, so they are all still dealing with elementary school issues while I can sit back and be the wise one who spews forth words of wisdom that I've gained from my experience with three teenagers and now two adult children.  You know, I can tell them encouraging things like, "Oh man, you ain't seen nothin' yet, girls!" or "I envy you all - these are the easy years for you" or "I highly suggest you subscribe to the 'Mind Numbing Drug' of the month club before they reach the age of 13..," 

I had saved 'points' for the dinner because when you eat out you are never quite sure how many calories they pack into even 'healthy' looking food.  When I got there, however, I decided I was going to splurge and I ordered a margarita before dinner.  I had an urge for one after leaving work that day, and by golly - I thought I should have one!  After all, with all the points I had left...how many calories can be in a margarita, after all?   Seriously, when you don't drink a lot and have a margarita - it hits you fast and I enjoyed the euphoric feeling that lasted all through my white chicken chili and salad.   I think, if I were asked, that I would have to say that it was THE BEST margarita I ever had.  Maybe it was because I don't drink anymore...maybe it was because after that day at work, I just needed something to relax...maybe it was because it was just simply THE BEST MARGARITA EVER. 

It was the BEST MARGARITA EVER until I came home and looked up calories.  The average margarita has 550 calories!!  Suddenly, it wasn't the 'best margarita ever' anymore!  Holy crap!  So, I went over my daily WW points by nine thanks to the former best margarita ever.  I'd have to walk five and a half miles to burn up enough calories to 'earn' a margarita next time.  Sigh.  Still, I have the memories...

This old woman has to wear her reading glasses this morning, as I've been reading and reading at work and by the time I got home last night everything was fuzzy.  (No, it wasn't the margarita - it wasn't that good.)  There comes that time in your life when bodily parts just don't function as they did anymore.  I accept it with grace.  I know things start crapping out on you (like limbs and bones and eyes and most internal organs.)   Sigh.  When I finally do my cartwheel after losing my weight, I will definitely have an ambulance on standby.  Even if I don't need it, they can flash their lights and turn on their siren like they do at football games when the home team gets a touchdown.

For those of you reading this on the day it was uploaded, it is FRIDAY.  Do you have a whole weekend planned of nothing but fun like me?  You know - going nuts - doing housework?   WOOT!  My daughter is coming home this weekend so she and I are also going out to do 'girl' things (which is a genetic challenge for both of us) and get our hair done and shop.  I love having my hair touched and played with.  Very very relaxing.   (And it's a heck of a lot less fattening than a stupid margarita.) 

February 3, 2007 - This morning my daughter and I went to get our hair cut.  While Terri was working on our hair, we were lucky enough to see a block of ice carved into Spongebob right out front!  How lucky is that?   We all know how I love Spongebob!!  It was a very cool morning.  Kudos to the ice guy out there making the ice do what his chainsaw said.  They had 20 blocks of ice or so to carve Saturday.  Oye!

They were having an ice festival in our town this weekend.  It was perfect weather for it! 

Of course we took the opportunity to get shots with the finished product! 

It wasn't so bad when we first got into town but the wind picked up a LOT! 

They were giving carriage rides through town and having a chili cook off.  (Last year's festival was warm and sunny, I believe - no ice involved!  Give a whole new meaning to life when you have an ice festival and ice is there to attend.)

February 4, 2007 - Burrrr.  It's currently -5 degrees here.   We left the water in the tub running a tad last night to keep the pipes from freezing.  (Ah, Vickie - does that bring back memories?  Smile.)  The bathroom pipes are on the side that of the house taking the brunt of 20-30 mph sub zero winds, so we thought we'd be safer and not sorrier.  For you normal people who have normal housing with normal pipes and normal insulation and the like, this is normally not a problem for you I would assume?  Maybe it is when it's this cold, I just don't know.  I live in a cinder block garage turned into a living space and poorly at that.   Before this we lived in a cinder block store front in town which also seemed to freeze vital inbound water lines.  Before that we lived in a trailer in the country in the middle of a field that was just begging for it's pipes to be frozen.  Before that I lived with my parents and Dad contended with all the worry about freezing and water pipes and the like.  So, in conclusion, I have no idea who has to worry about water lines freezing up when it's this cold out, so I'll shut up.  The whole point of this story was to say that we left the water running just a trickle in the tub to prevent freezing lines, and now my tub has a lovely orange glow to it due to the high content of rust in our water.  It gives me something to look forward to later when I'm cleaning it off.  God bless 'The Works.'

Yesterday, after seeing Spongebob come to life from a rectangular block of ice, my daughter and I had lunch together then were going to go shopping.  We turned back and came home due to the white out conditions on the roadways.  Besides not being able to see anything in front of us but those floaty spots in your eyes you see when you are looking at nothing but blinding white, we also noticed we were the only car on the road when the blowing snow squalls let up for a second or two.  We were surrounded by four wheel drive trucks.   Four wheel drive trucks think they are so cool, geez.  Since we were following a WHITE truck, I gave in to the fact that I don't really have x-ray vision after all and turned to come home.  I took a back road to our house from there, which goes directly by a lake which of course is the launch tarmac for 30 mph blowing snow.  Duh.   Sometimes I'm just not that bright.

I just threw out seed for the birdies behind one of the bigger drifts out back.  They were all huddled there keeping warm looking hungry.  There are four female cardinals flashing their wings at the one male.  I didn't know the underside of the females wings were so RED.   Wow.  They were very grateful for the food and now MORE are coming to eat there.  I am glad I got twenty more pounds of birdie food on Friday.

I am going to get myself a new digital camera when we get tax money back.  My daughter's kicks major butt.  I love that thing.  It's a Canon something model with 7.5 mp capacity.   Happy Sigh.  Mine is a little 3 mp camera that was state of the art many moons ago.  My cousin Dave sent me some pictures he took with his real camera and WOW -   I had forgotten how good of a photographer Dave was!  (David, if you read this - can you re-send those to me?  I didn't keep your email before I downloaded those pics and I wanted to post them here illegally without your permission and take credit for them and stuff  Smile.)

My youngest son got his Nintendo Wii yesterday in the mail.  (His older brother had finally won a bid on one via Ebay for his little bro.  Youngest son had saved and saved his money for a Wii but they are few and far between in these here parts at the stores.  When his big brother won the bid, my youngest son told everyone in the world that "We have a Wii!!"  He was quite excited.  Ah, youth.  They get excited over new video stuff and I get excited because I wake up breathing in the morning...)  He wanted to go out and spend the rest of his money on games and another controller last night.  He didn't comprehend that there were 'blizzard' like conditions outside.   Big brother just laughed at him.  "We are NOT going anywhere tonight!" he said in a matter of fact older brother voice.  (Besides all the stores had closed early due to the weather so even if big bro did feel adventurous there was nothing open to adventure to.)  I must admit the Wii is fun.  Just something as simple as the bowling game is a hoot.  You have to actually swing your arm to send the ball down the alley.  Too cool.  Youngest son even re-arranged his WHOLE ROOM so he can move and the like while playing the sports game.  (Go figure, he'll do housework for a video game.  Me, I have to threaten him with bodily harm to get him scoop the cat poop.)

February 4 Continued...- David sent me the cool pics I wanted, so I will post them here.  (Pay no attention to the David behind the curtain - it was ME who took these pictures as I'm so cool and stuff.)

I love these shots of rapids near my cousin's house...

February 9, 2007 - Burrrrrrrrr!  That's all I gots to say about that...

I took a vacation day today!  I feel so - so - EVIL.  I am still working on line, mind you - but I'm not there!  I'm here - in my pajamas.  You just can't pull off wearing pajamas to work anymore.  I don't see why;  People would be so much more relaxed in sweat pants and a t-shirt or naked, for that matter.   I do plan on going to the store later as the small fish tank has turned orange, and I've yet to research on line WHY it might have turned orange.  I don't use my own tap water for the fish - I buy gallons and gallons of non-rusty water just for them.  I'm confused.  I will be buying new rocks and will clean the little tank today.   Catching guppies is a challenge.  The tetra fish are easier - the guppies, oye!  Wadsworth and Roderick are doing fine in the bigger tank.  Wadsworth continues to grow and grow and grow...I will have to Fed Ex him down to Vickie's pond in Florida soon if he continues to grow at this rate.  Actually, he could probably walk down there by then. 

The dogs and my youngest son have been worshipping our old furnace lately. Every time it kicks on, they gather around the furnace and vie for space.   Someday I will have a normal house with a normal furnace that come up through the floors via vents and they can each claim their own vent instead of bunching up in front of the bedroom door.  I have a dream...(not seen in this picture are two of the three cats who lay UNDER the furnace.)

Stewie doesn't worship the furnace like the others.  He's too busy keeping watch of the squirrels and birds outside at the bird feeder.  I can't believe how big he's gotten!  He is such a nut.  He has no concept how to retract his claws so we often find him hanging from a curtain or a chair, just stuck there.  (We leave him hanging hoping he'll get the idea on how to retract at some point.  Judging by the marks on my bunk bed ladder and the wall frames and my shredded curtains, it ain't happening any time soon.)  He picks fights with the big older cats only to be wailed on severely, yet he'll go right back at it.  He drools when you pet him and then it's normally when he's directly over your face.  He has a constant virus condition that effects his eyes.  He sleeps in the litter box.  He thinks he's still a little kitten and assumes he can curl up on your chest near your neck.  What can I say?  I love Stewie even with all his quirks.  Below are 'now and then' pics.  The picture of 'then' makes his eyes look odd, but it was the lighting, I'm sure.  He's not possessed, I swear.  

My husband will once again do the exotic "Dance of 1000 Toilets" as the seal isn't working anymore and the house is constantly reeking of that lovely septic tank/cabbage smell.  Ugh.   I hate coming home to that smell.  I burn incense and candles and anything that will cover the smell up, however you can't cover that smell up.  You just end up with a house that smells like scented cabbage.  There is a reason there is not a perfume on the market that smells like scented cabbage!!  It is obvious we will have to get a port-o-potty in the spring and rip up the whole floor in there to fix the issue.  (As often as I pee in the night, I dread having to go outside to do it, but then again - I always did wonder what it would be like with an outhouse.  I have fond memories of port-o-johns from my concert going days and from working in the corn fields - maybe it will be an experience.  I am SURE it will generate many fun hours of blogging for Sandy.  It won't be too bad as long as I don't sit on a raccoon...)  

A picture of Jake and Kia defending us from the evil rabbit and rogue gangs of squirrels...

Ah, Criminal Minds on CBS had TWO HOURS on Wednesday.  Happy Sigh.  I love that show.  It was extremely gruesome this week but the actual gruesome parts were really left to your imagination, which can fill in the blanks in more gruesome ways that seeing it for real.   I get so worked up watching that show that during commercials I normally do housework and make my youngest son help.  (Power cleaning as it were.)  He finally said, "Mom!  Geez!  Just do some jumping jacks or something!   Leave me out of this!" 

I'm off to conquer the world.  If Terri reads this - I sure hope you feel better!  HUGS to you all.  

February 10, 2007 - So yesterday I had the day off, and I will tell you why I did.  I won a prize at our local Meijers store for participating in the "email advisory panel." 

I took the day off to collect said prize and shop.   I have been needing shoes in the worst way for the longest time.  I got three pairs!  Just for ME!  I also bought some more shirts for work and two skirts JUST FOR ME!  I picked up panty hose and little sock things with 'Family Guy' characters on them JUST FOR ME!  I got new rocks and fake plastic plants to 'bling' up the little guppy tank, too.  I bought Kia and Jake chew toys that squeaked (did squeak, may they rest in peace- the dogs had the toys torn about in less than 15 minutes and the squeakers silenced and the fluffy guts of the toys all over the living room.)   It was kind of nice spending money on "me".  (I am sure I will get over the guilt associated with that in a day or two, even though it was "free" money technically.)  The rest of the money went for groceries.  Never in my life have I so artfully and skillfully packed a shopping cart such as I did on Friday.  I should have taken my camera.   It was a work of art.

February 11, 2007- Women, Geez!  Why do women suck up pain when they should probably be rushed to a hospital or better yet FLOWN to one by helicopter?   (Mind you, I'm not saying MEN don't put up with a lot of pain, either!  I mean, come on - they put up with WOMEN after all, but the most common person to accept the fact they are in pain and then deal with it is the female of the species.)  A good example is myself;  I was eight months pregnant with my last child way back when in 1992.  I started having what could be considered extreme pain (times six thousand) in the lower regions of my body.  I was pregnant - most people in their right mind would go seek medical attention when it felt like rabid donkeys were kicking them in the lower lumbar region, but not ME.  Duh.  When I got home from work, I told my husband that something was wrong but I wasn't quite sure WHAT was wrong but I was sure it was pretty bad.  I also told him I knew it wasn't labor pains...but that was the last lucid moment of that night that I remember.  After that the pain was so terrible that I was delirious.  I saw squirrels all over the living room.  I kept telling my family to get the squirrels off the TV set.  "Please, they'll chew stuff up!" I pleaded with my husband.  He sat there all night with me as I rolled around and moaned in pain.  (Or rolled as far as an 8th month pregnant woman could.)   I do remember thinking how much better I would feel if I could roll onto my stomach...but that was impossible as someone was occupying that area.  I had moments that I slept from exhaustion, my husband reported.  I even went to work the next morning!  DUH.  (They had planned a 'surprise' baby shower for me where they were shutting down the whole shop just for this event!  I couldn't NOT show up!   My coworker Amanda had told me about the surprise shower when I was having the extreme pain and wondering if I should go to the hospital or not the day before.) 

So I went to work - how I went to work I have no idea.  The girls in my department treated me like I was royalty and didn't let me move from my chair that morning.  Amanda pushed me up to the party in my rolling chair.  I sat there through the party as best I could.   I cried a lot because I was in pain, exhausted, and ready to drop at any moment, but also because these people went ALL OUT and got us EVERYTHING for the baby.  It was very touching.  While this was all going on, it was arranged for my husband to take me directly to my OB-GYN baby doc right after the party.  They wheeled me out to the car.  Turns out I was passing a kidney stone and was terribly dehydrated and probably should have gone in to the hospital the night before.  They couldn't even find a vein to take blood from that day due to the duress my body was in - I believe they ended up using a butterfly type needle in my hand to get a bit o blood.  I was put on medical leave immediately.  Sigh. 

Why did I not go to the hospital?  Why didn't I panic - I was, after all, carrying a kid and was in such pain that I knew it was not a normal sort of thing when one was pregnant (except, of course, when pushing the little booger out.)  If I didn't know I needed medical attention at the time, I was pretty sure of it when the squirrels showed up.  I needed help yet I didn't ask for it.  Typical female action, I believe.  I think it's in our genetic make up to be a martyr.  As a female you could be pinned under a car while the car was on fire, but you'd probably still find a way to make cookies for the annual charity food sale at the local high school.  The mere fact females have the kids (and honey - that is the worst pain EVER) makes us a special type human life form, but it shouldn't cloud our judgement when it comes to our well being.  Women.   Geez.  That's all I got to say about that, except I highly suggest if you start seeing rodents running about your living room that really aren't there, call 911! 

February 13, 2007 - Hug Hug Hug!  I love Valentine's Day!  (OK, so I'm a day early, but whadya gonna do?)  I love LOVE!   What a wonderful emotion!  I love how you can love colors and smells and sunsets and puppies.  Sigh.  I also love how the emotion of love can turn to crushing hate at the drop of the hat.  So Amazing!  Such a fine line.  I think I mostly associate 'love' with the feeling of awe I get when considering life in general.  Waking up every morning breathing is a awesome thing.  I will miss that when I'm not doing it any more.  If you are not in love right now, then you have not looked at the sky lately.  If you are not in love right now then you are not taking advantage of being human to the max.  To me, being "in love" covers so much, not just being "in love" with another human, but being in love with the fact you can appreciate the day to day chaos around you.  It's the little things that can fill our life with love;  Those random bubbles that float out and around the kitchen from the dishwater and have a spectrum of colors...now that's love (as long as they don't land in your eye socket.)  The smell of home baked bread...that's love.  Your child's first stick man drawing...that's love.  The fact that your dog licks your face when you are crying...that's love.  The fact that my cat Stewie drools on my face when I'm petting him because he's so happy to be petted by ME...that's love but gross at the same time.  The sunset that is infused with so many colors of red and purple that it brings tears to your eyes...that's love.  (The tears might be related to the fact you were staring directly into the sun which is not recommended by the scientific community, but hey...it's still awesome.)  Love is hearing your cousin or friend leave you a voice mail message that is goofy and rambling which in turn makes you laugh.  Love is your faith which permits you to face each new day even when the world is quite scary. 

I'm waxing poetic - but I don't apologize.  I wish everyone in the world could feel a smidge of love somewhere in their being.  I think the world lacks a lot of love...

I was kind of upset when I saw all the phoophah over the death of Anna Nicole.  (May she rest in peace.) I am sorry she passed.  It's always a shock when you lose a loved one, although you couldn't tell it by her mother who jumped into the spotlight and bashed her daughter.   I just wish we all were able to nab a headline when we passed on.  (Not necessarily for the horrible or odd things we did, mind you!)  It's bad enough that every time you go to a news page on line you have to see Britney's boobs staring you in the face (as if we care.)  The media coverage on Anna after she died - oy!  Why don't they splash the faces of the Army/Navy/Marines/National Guardsmen and civilians that have died in Iraq?  Why are we not as fascinated with the fact men and women are dying who AREN'T Anna Nicole?  Sigh.  Humans - go figure.  I guess if we want to get the word out that we lost someone in our lives that meant so much to us, we have to make our own headlines. 

*THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE PASSED AWAY THAT MISSES*

Cloyce F. Glenn
10/10/1915 - 5/2/1981
(One of the Best Uncles Ever)

Edward *Edgar* Ancil Glenn
6/15/1913 - 7/27/1985
(Hi Dad!  I have three cats!!)

Gary Steven Riesener
11/12/1957 - 11/5/1990
(One of the first people in my life who attempted to give me a clue and stuck it out until I finally got it)

Vera L. (Glenn)Congdon
6/4/1927 - 9/1/1994
(Geez, Vera...Haunt me or something!)

Harold R. Congdon
8/26/1923 - 4/27/1996
(Is that Mennen Skin Bracer I smell?)

George Jablinski
11/27/1946 - 10/8/1997
(Sweetest Man this side of the Rockies)

Linda K. Lynn
10/28/1947 - 2/2/1998
(Always a joy!)

Bettie Marie (Austin) Glenn
2/10/1922 -9/9/1998
(I miss you, Mom! Pick up the phone, will you?)

And let’s not forget Grandpa Shearer, Ken Thompson, Gerri Miller, Aunt Leona (Glenn) Barringer, Alec Manuszak, Gary Lipka, Dave McComas, John O’Keefe, Dr. Dahlstrom, Uncle Chuck, Aunt Pat, Mary Pifer …as sad as it is, the list goes on...

March 4, 2006 - So, my husband and I have the stereo cranked up LOUDLY listening to one of our favorite CDs from yesteryear...(although when we listened to this particular album back then it was either on vinyl or 8 track or cassette...)  The dogs are on the couch crouched in fear from the loud music. The kids are at a movie.  (My daughter constantly complains of the loud music in the dorm - she would probably puke to hear how loud we have it now.)   We, at our ripe old age, are 'rocking out' man... it feels good.  Loud percussion.  Happy Sigh.  One should do this every so often.  I started dinner and danced and swept and dusted and danced in-between all those chores.  I had my groove on, I tell ya.  We probably won't be able to hear anyone speak tonight or tomorrow and will have to resort to sign language to communicate, but for now -  it's quite fun.  I honestly wish I was so rich and famous and drop dead adorable that I could pay/bribe Paul Rodgers and Jimmy Page to get back together for a 'Firm' reunion in my back yard.  I would cook for them and do their laundry.  They could play with the dogs to relax.   We'd get backup singers from local churches and the High School Choir.  I hope before I croak or they croak, I get to see them play. 

March came in like a lion weather wise.  We had it easy compared to most when I see those sad stories across America about the tornadoes and storms.  My son came home Friday night from work quite worked up due to the blowing and the ice on the roads.  "It just pushed me over to the side of the road!"  (He has a huge old car - if he was getting drafted to the side of the road, it had to be blowing hard.)  He finally got some traction on the side of the road where there were snow drifts to dig in to.  He stopped half way up the drive way due to the snow drifts that had filled the drive way in since I had come home.  I think he was truly happy to be HOME and in one piece.  It was a glare of ice under the blowing snow. 

My daughter is home for spring break.   I should be honored she wants to spend spring break with her family.  The puppies are so happy she's home.  Kia just has a fit when my daughter puts on her shoes because Kia thinks she's leaving again.  Kia has never been  aggressive against anyone except for Friday night, when Odie jumped up to sit with my daughter while she was working on her laptop.  Kia went after Odie with a vengeance - almost pushing my daughter's computer off her lap.  Oh my.  Green eyed doggy!

I got a new 10.1 mega pixel camera for my anniversary from my husband.  I have been playing with it for several days.   It's been like I am a member of the Hollywood paparazzi around here - snapping tons of pictures of nothing.  The camera has a touch screen and can take an 1.3 hours worth of movie time!  It rocks.  I have yet to take a memorable picture.   So far it's just goofy stuff.  (Well, I got two cute pics of the kids below...)  When I get some fine fine pictures, I shall post them to show you my photographic prowess.  (I think I have some prowess ... we'll have to wait and see.)

April 3, 2007 - I honestly cannot believe it's already the month of April.  My sister and brother have birthdays this month.  Rain showers this month bring May flowers so it's said.  We're supposed to get snow maybe later this week, and the local plant nursery has a sign out front that says "April Snow Showers bring May Flowers..." which is cute.  When you get older, time flies by at the speed of light - it's very unreal. 

I am looking forward to having the whole brood home for Easter weekend.  Friday night we are going to see "Jesus Christ Superstar' (the musical) at WMU.  I am very excited.  I first saw it in 1973 or so with Diane and her family at the movie theater.  Ted Neely - who played Jesus in the movie is doing the musical now.  Kind of cool.  (Diane's daughter, Lisa - was my friend who moved to Ohio when I was 14 or so and I was going to run away to see Barry Manilow with her down there. I was such a rebel.  Of course I didn't actually run away, but I thought about it and threatened my folks with it!) 

My daughter was filling out an online application to Walgreen's yesterday.  She would message me to ask questions about it.  She has not filled out too many applications in her time.  One of the questions was "which location are you applying for" and it didn't have the location of the one she was applying for. (A new one that is opening next week.)  I laughed and told her that Walgreen's were putting up so many new stores that I was convinced that their growth rate was out of control and the stores were reproducing on their own at a phenomenal rate.  You cannot use Walgreen's as a landmark when giving directions around here or the poor person would be driving around in circles for days... When will the madness stop?

April 4, 2007 - OK, so I am just beside myself.  Today my oldest son calls me at approximately 4:15 today at work.  "Well, I can't make fun of my sister anymore..." he started out telling me, and that is never good to hear when you've had two boys who have been making fun of their sister for her fainting episodes last month.   "Where are you!??" I asked, as I could tell he wasn't at work or home or in his car... He just happened to be on in an ambulance on the way to the closest hospital to his place of employment.  He had fainted at work.  The HR person decided he was going to the hospital via ambulance. He called to let me know.  I asked if he wanted me up there but he thought he'd be fine and would update me if he needed me. After I hung up, I flew to Judy's office to whine to her about it. "Another one is down!" I lamented.  Doug heard me going on about it and asked if I happened to have a bird in my house, and if I did have a bird - was it alive?  That made me laugh hard.  (Miners took birds into the mines if you recall.  If the bird keeled over, of course you would too eventually from the poisonous gases.)  I said we must be planted right on top of a radon patch.  My sister suggested we're living over an old Indian burial ground.  My husband suggest our oldest start wearing a protective helmet.  There have been many funny remarks.  

My oldest is now home. He fainted once again at the hospital.  Sigh.  So what if their 26 years old - they are still your baby!!  He called his sister and apologized for all the "crap" he gave her over her fainting issues.  He will follow up like a good boy tomorrow with the family doctor, and I'm off to research on the web about instances where mass numbers of family members suddenly start fainting all over the place for no apparent reason. 

April 5, 2007 - I had an "I suddenly need chocolate for no better reason than that fact I think I need it hence I should have it" attack yesterday afternoon (prior to my son calling) and ate five Cadbury Orange Creme eggs that I had in my purse.  I had purchased those eggs to augment the little mini baskets I was going to do for the kids.  I ate them and I enjoyed them even though I knew each one of them was three points against me (Weight Watchers flex points wise.)  I also ate a Milky Way bar as the five Cadbury eggs were not enough to ease my increasing anxiety demand for chocolate.  (Another 5 points.)  I (now) attribute the chocolate attack to the fact I knew something was going to happen to my oldest - so I got the stress eating out of the way prior to hearing about it.  I have always had a connection to him in that way - just knowing when something happened to him or was going to...you know, that 'gut' feeling you get.  Next time I get that feeling I'm just calling 911 and giving them the location of each of my kids to save time.

Oh, I forgot to mention the fact that my oldest, on the way home after his incident last night, got a speeding ticket.   "Insult to injury..." he commented when he got home.  He was going 40 mph in a 30 mph zone and while talking to his sister about his ordeal.  I can only imagine what the police man thought.  Number one - my son's driver side window doesn't roll down so he had to crack the door open to tell the officer this. Of course the officer had his hand on his gun.  (I would too if I was a police officer and the person I just pulled over was acting like they were going to jump out of the car.)   Number two - my son had large cotton wads and tape on his hands and on arms where they had IVs set up and blood draws done, PLUS he had an hospital ID bracelet on.  If I were that officer I would be wondering what mental hospital this boy just escaped from. I thank that officer for not shooting nor tasering my son.

Of course, little brother was all over big bro about all of this.  He sat on the couch going over all the times his big bro had teased him about being wimpy, etc.  "I had my tonsils out and IVs in me and drugs and I didn't faint!"  I know my youngest was worried.   The kids are very close.  Humor naturally kicks in however when things go awry in our family.  So the funnier my youngest was the more I know he was quite upset by the whole ordeal.  "One of you kids has to take care of me when I'm old, so quit dropping like flies!!!" I commanded before I went to bed.  I should check the expiration date on my kids.  Maybe their "use by" date has come and gone.  

My friend Terri wrote to suggest checking the furnace and that was one of my first thoughts.  Old house/old furnace - possible evil emissions.  This IS an old house and I am anal about the toxic levels emitted from said furnace.  I think my oldest son's issue is the fact he was not drinking enough water and was dehydrated.  He drinks A LOT of diet pop and always has. I wonder if the phenylalaines in the diet pop finally felled the beast? Sigh. 

On Tuesday we had the windows open and it was breezy and 71 degrees outside.  Today it's 25 degrees and snowing outside. There is about 1 inch of snow on the ground as well.  Michigan - go figure.

April 9, 2007 - Merry Christmas!  Oh, wait - no, it's SPRING.  I was confused by all the snow.  Sorry.

Friday night was wonderful. We saw Jesus Christ Superstar at Miller Auditorium.  Contented sigh. Very well done. Ted Neely can still hit those screaming high notes.  I think he only sang one major note off key, but hey - if I was doing the same show for 30+ years I miss a note here and there too.  Plus, I can't even get close to hitting those kind of notes when I sing unless I shut my hand in a car door.  He does it with out the car door!  Amazing.  It was snowing quite hard when we got out of the musical, but decided to go get a snack nonetheless.  We were in the restaurant for 40 minutes and an inch of snow had fallen by the time we got out.  It was VERY icy on the roads.  Being an old fart, I let the force take over - and drive with respect for the road conditions.  However, the people around me...that's a whole 'nother story. A car was coming down a slight incline to a red light that we were approaching and did several spins after he tried to break in front of us. I just went around him and kept going.  Survival of the fittest when it comes to icy roads.  (Had he gotten hurt or was thrown from his car, I would have helped mind you!  He just did a lot of donut spins by accident and was headed back in the opposite direction. A sign maybe that he should go home!)

We had a grand Easter dinner with my mother in law yesterday and ate way too much.  I cooked low fat and sugar free as much as I could, but that doesn't mean squat when you shove so much in your mouth. Still, it was delicious and this morning I have a food hangover.  Belch. I must get back on track this week.  I hate the feeling of eating too much now, and know when I have eaten too much.  My body says, "Lady!  Back off!" when I eat too much.  I almost appreciate the fact I can tell that my body hates me when I do that.  I don't appreciate how I feel - but I do appreciate the warnings.

Fun with bunny ears

April 11, 2007 - My cousin who lives in Wisconsin is getting snow.  Me, who lives in Michigan, am getting snow.  (There is something terribly wrong grammar wise in that last sentence, but it made me smile, so I'm leaving it in.)  April Snow seems to be a trend. 

I am still laughing over my youngest son and Friday night when the roads were so bad.  I had mandated that everyone in the car be SILENT so I could concentrate.  They were all quiet for a bit, then in the back seat there was this low deep rumbling of sporadic words eeking out of my son's mouth.  It almost sounded like Walter Cronkite reporting from a bunker somewhere. "...a child dies every three seconds from hunger in nations around the world...you can save a child by donating only 24 dollars a month...the roads tonight were slick and ice covered...the state police have issued a warning that all cars should stay off the roads...toyota...my sister stinks and hates to be poked so I am forced to poke her...never before in my career have I seen such devastation...Sunday services at 8 and 11...I'd slug you if there were a slug bug but there is not, so I won't but I do have the urge to slug you...and that's the way it was..."  He droned on and on like that for several miles.  When the car spun out in front of us, we all finally screamed in unison, "SHUT UP!"  Still, it was very funny.  Random babbling should never be overlooked as a comic tool. 

I got the cats new bags of catnip last night.  Fun was had by all.  When life gets boring or you are sick of the lack of furballs in your living room, buy fresh catnip and let the festivities begin.

I took my camera to work today to capture the lovely snow we were having.  It really came down this morning fast and furious with lots of wind to throw it around.  Lots of wet slush everywhere;   The kind of slush that pulls your car to one side or the other...basically pulls your car to where you don't want to be.  (See what you are missing, Vickie?)

May 2, 2007 - Holy Crap!  When did May get here already??   Time keeps flying by.  Amazing.

My daughter has completed her first year of college!  HURRAY!  My daughter has a final grade point average of 3.91!  HURRAY!  My daughter has a job!  HURRAY!  Maybe it's not May, maybe it's really Christmas!!

June 2, 2007 - Ah, it feels good to sit down!  After getting up at 6:30 this morning, I cleaned my house, then me and "the boys" went to help move my Aunt and Uncle into their new apartment..  I am glad we did it this morning as it rained a bit ago.  I think my Aunt and Uncle are pretty much moved in.  We still have to clean her old apartment and finish moving odds and ends, but we have three more weeks to get that done.  They are closer to me which I like, and I like their new apartment better than the old one.

I talked to the nice insurance agent Friday, and Houston - we're getting a new roof!  HURRAY!  I am not sure when, but they approved it.  (Happy Squeal.)  It will be nice to remove the buckets upstairs.

June 3, 2007 - Stewie the Idiot Cat made a break for it out the front door this morning when I was surveying my "kingdom" after waking up.   (It's tradition for me to gaze out all windows and doors in the morning to see wildlife coming and going and to confirm we're still where we were when we went to sleep.   Normally that is the case - us still being where we should be location wise, so I really don't  know why I would suspect otherwise.)  Stewie is NOT an outdoor cat.  Oh, sure, he still has claws and can climb a tree (where he is currently located, in a tree surrounded by about 50 birds ready to kick his butt) but he has no 'street' smarts and tends to get allergies from the real world.  Sigh.  He gallops like a stallion in heat so I can't catch him.  This morning Taffy (who's seven and IS an outdoor type cat with many mole kills under his belt) went out with Stewie to see the comedy unfold.  My oldest son left his car windows down, so Taffy plopped himself in my son's car to watch Stewie gallop all over the yard like a spastic caffeinated whack job.  If Taffy had a cell phone, I'm sure he'd be calling his friends to share the humor or sending them pictures of the event. 

It looks as if it will rain soon.  They predict bad weather all weekend.  The storm we got last night was mild, although when the wind kicked up I went outside to shake my fist at it.  (Once bitten, twice pissed, I guess.)  We need the rain, so I guess I can empty buckets for the greater good of the ecosystem around these parts. 

In the last two weeks, I've seen three guys on motorcycles with their turn signals going.  It makes me laugh.  The older my generation gets brings new humorous moments to enjoy.  We have a lot of older guys/gals riding cycles now (not only to save on gas money, but they grew up riding them - why stop just because you are a paying member of AARP?) and these older kids riding motorcycles do things we laughed at our grandparents for such as the turn signal being left on for miles on end.  I think I am going to enjoy this getting older stuff.   There are a lot of things we'll all do that will bring much laughter to many.

June 5, 2007 - Last night my daughter and I watched two male hummingbirds and one female duke it out around the nectar feeder.  It was a hoot.   I filmed it, but it's too huge to post or I would share.  The males would face each other then slowly head skyward - like they had on tiny little jet packs.  This went on for over an hour, and finally they just started resting on the dog fence in between confrontations.  The female would interject herself now and then, but she mostly watched from the fence.  It was good entertainment.  Far better than anything that was on television!

I brought home some boxes for my daughter.   (She went garage sailing for stuff for her apartment this fall and had to repack the items for storing until moving them.)  Muffy the Cat, of course, has taken it upon himself to personally inspect each empty box.  What cat can resist an empty box.   I know I couldn't if I were a cat.  Empty boxes and those plastic rings from milk jugs - what more could a cat need? 

During one of my breaks at work, I watched an ant drag a dead beetle back to his hole  and the beetle was three times his size.   It was quite interesting how this little guy figured out how to finally get a hold of the carcass to get it over the rocks.  He wouldn't give up, either!  Man, all those songs and stories you hear are true!  That ant did have high hopes, boy howdy.

Got some hummingbird shots!  Woot!

<-Ok, this isn't a humingbird - it's my youngest son in the suit that he bought, but I keep forgetting to post it and just saw it in my folder, so I'm posting it now...NOW here come the hummingbird shots...

June 7, 2007 - Today at work during our morning meeting for some odd reason we got into a discussion (totally NOT work related) about the location of Cheboygan vs. Charlevoix.  (For those of you not from Michigan - phonically speaking it would be pronounced 'shaboygun' and 'sharlevoy.')  Using our hands as maps, we all were slightly confused as to which city was on which Great Lake (this also led to a brief side discussion on "how many Great Lakes are there" and "what the heck were all of their names anyway" plus I also wondered why they call them the "Great Lakes"  - why are they so great?  After all, what have they done for me lately...but I digress...)  I thought Cheboygan was on the tip of the ring finger and I had no clue where Charlevoix was ... my coworker Shawn was the winner.  Charlevoix is on the tip of the ring finger on Lake Michigan and Cheboygan is on the tip of the index finger on Lake Huron.  Phew.  Now we can all sleep well tonight. 

The word 'Cheboygan' is just a cool word in general and I am tempted to name my next dog "Cheboygan."  For the rest of the day, seeing as I have a constant soundtrack running in my head as it is, all of the song's main nouns were replaced with 'Cheboygan' and I made myself laugh all day when a verse would plop out of my head without prior warning.   Barry Manilow - "Oh Cheboygan, you came and you gave without taking...but I sent you away...Cheboygan.."  or that song from the musical 'Mame' - "Hello Cheboygan, Well Hello, Cheboygan...it's so nice to have you back where you belong..."   and let's not forget that famous song by the Doors - "Hello Cheboygan won't you tell me your name..."  Needless to say this went on all day long and now I have a Cheboygan hangover.  (Take two Lake Hurons and call me in the morning...)  

June 9, 2007 - I will always be amazed that the first thing you see on news pages is something about, let's say -  Paris Hilton, and the information about Iraq is farther down the page as if it doesn't matter.  Sigh.   Let Paris go back to jail and serve her time and leave her alone and DON'T report on it because it's STUPID.  America's appetite for STUPID goes way beyond the normal recommended daily dosage of STUPID.  We're gluttons for STUPID.  Sigh. 

However, some news I was fascinated by this week was about the young man that got stuck in his wheelchair on the front of a semi over in Paw Paw.  I'm sure you've heard that story from earlier this week.  Stories like that don't bother me as it happened to a real person like you and I.  It had a twist of humor to it due to the circumstances, and I'm sure he will have to deal with "Indy Wheelchair 500" jokes the rest of his life  The poor dude!  What a wild ride.  When they show that story on the news, they should include a disclaimer that "you should not try this at home."

My youngest son gave me a lecture the other night after I had grabbed a bag of chips and was snacking on them.  He looked at me and shook his head.  "Mom, you haven't lost any weight since you stopped the Weight Watcher meetings.  Did you give up?  You were doing so good!  Why did you give up?  You don't even really want those chips!  Don't you want to get thinner?..."  He sounded so 'grown up' and logical that I stopped the chips and got up.  "You are right, my dear!  Thank you!"  I recorded the points of the chips on my WW sheet, put the chips back, and went outside instead and did the push mowing.  (That was the night it was like 85 degrees, so I got a good sweat going.)  After the push mowing, I got 3/4 of the riding mower part done as well.   I quit at 9:30 when I couldn't see the lines I was making in the yard anymore.   Last night for a snack I had a 100 calorie pack of popcorn, then a bowl of cereal, and was going for chips again when my husband shook his head at me and said, "Well, aren't we the little eating machine!"  Hahahaha.  True.  I stopped eating and went out to pull weeds around the house instead.  I wish they would start up Weight Watchers at work again - that was just too convenient.  I guess until they do that again, I will rely on the input from my family to keep me on the straight and narrow.   I will also listen to Stella, my pet hernia - who complained loudly last night as I was bending over to weed.  "You can't get me fixed until you lose another 20 pounds, you idiot, so get on it!"  I really would like to get rid of Stella.  As much as I've enjoyed her company since I discovered I had her, I really really don't want her anymore.  It hurts when I wear pants or when the least amount of pressure is on 'her' at all.  I know people live with hernias all their lives.  My Mom did.  I don't think she named her hernia, however...but she had one for as long as I could remember growing up.  I, on the other hand, don't like the constant knowledge that my intestines are roaming free where they are not supposed to be!   I want Stella fixed. 

There - I feel better.  I swept out my car and washed it.  At least for a few hours I'll have no cat prints on the roof and hood.  I also weeded a flower bed, did a load of laundry, and did the dishes.   This afternoon is my niece's graduation party.  I am looking forward to the cake.  I think I earned enough points to have a piece and not feel too bad about it!  It's the second piece I know I'll have that will be an issue...

June 11, 2007 - Weekends are bad for Sandy when it comes to mass food consumption.  Unseen evil forces lurk at every corner shoving food down my throat.  Oh sure, I protest, but I swallow.  Sigh.  Why does food have to taste so darned good?  (The real question is why does Sandy have no will power at all?) 

I seriously don't have any willpower.  I have known this is an issue with myself all my life starting after the younger age, but I have denied it to myself but will no more.  I used to be able to resist stuff - and I could save money and eat an ice cream cone very slowly and do all sorts of things that indicated I could control my own personal space/self, but that went away.  I finally admitted it to myself the other morning while sitting on the toilet.  (When one is sitting on the toilet, it's a good place to confront one's self as you are pretty well stuck there until your business is done, so it's a good place to talk to someone and they can't get away, even if it's yourself you are talking to.  It's all in the timing.)  

I know I'm committed to some things and follow through and do a good job - such as raising my kids and earning my paycheck.  Those are two things I can honestly say I'm GOOD at and I do follow through on.  Those two things are almost instinctual as far as my reaction to them.  I HAVE TO DO THEM and DO THEM WELL.  There is no willpower involved - I just do it.  I can't NOT do it. 

Then there is my marriage, which has been dragged behind a vehicle at high speeds for 27 years through fields of cacti then coated with raw meat and thrown to starving wolves - but it's still there.  I know I've tried in my marriage even though I would have rather given up and walked away and gone to another  - although my mental state wouldn't allow it at the time... 

So I know I can commit to some things.  I cannot commit to most others, such as losing weight.  I should be the girl on T.V. at this point saying, "I used to weigh 282 pounds, but now I'm only two dimensional and you can barely see me!"  But no - I stop at 60 pounds and then don't even try.   I guess I can compare it to my thoughts on peeling potatoes.  I can peel a ten pound bag of potatoes, let's say, but when I get to the last potato in the pile I can't bring myself to peel it - I'm ALMOST there, yet I loathe the thought of finishing!  What the hell is wrong with me?  Geez!  I know the benefit of losing just 60 excess pounds - I feel so much better.  I know fat can control your health.  I might have snorted at those reports before, but I believe them now.   Fat is seriously like an evil conjoined twin that takes control of your mental state and degrades your health until it's out of control.  I read back in my archives from 1999 when I had all those issues with my 'stomach' and went for tests and found I had no gall bladder, etc.  I believe my body was trying to tell me at that time something was wrong - but did I listen - NO!  So what did my poor body do - it gave up on me.   Now it knows it has a fighting chance once again and I totally ignore 'her' once more.  Big Sigh.  I also have big plans every year to put in a real garden and do something amazing with my flower beds, as well as putting in my favorite bulbs in the fall - daffodils, and trimming my lilac bushes.  I always end up planting a handful of pansies and petunias and calling it good.  If I end up planting one tomato plant I consider myself the World's Best Farmer this side of the Mississippi.  Really, it's quite sad when I think about it...I'm pretty sure it all boils down to the fact I'm extremely lazy.  I see no other reason.

There, enough of me ranting on about my issues.   I had to put it in print however to deal with it.  Maybe now I can talk to myself a bit easier when I get out of control, which is daily.  Being human is sometimes - well, difficult and confusing. 

June 12, 2007 - I went to my family doctor last night to get refills on some prescriptions, and she gave me a good talking to about not losing any more weight.  She wasn't cruel, just factual.  She sat down and we talked for a good 15 minutes.  That is rare nowdays for any doctor to do, I think.  I'm so close to the weight where I can have Stella the Hernia shoved back in place, that she encourages me not to stop now.  I encourage myself not to stop now.  Many people who read this have also sent encouraging letters.  Thank you!!  I needed it, I think.  I also needed to type it out and think about it myself.  Seems to help me.  Self analyzing, what a concept. 

I am posting pictures from my dear friend Dan - he had a flying squirrel in his house a while back.  This thing in adorable - look at the huge eyes on this squirrel!!!  I would be tempted to keep the little goober as a pet but my luck he'd be riddled with rabies and fleas and have sixty two kids.  Look at those big doe eyes!!!  Fly on, Rocky.  Fly on...  (I always have to look 'rabies' up in the dictionary to make sure I'm using the correct word for the disease animals carry as opposed to a flock of Jewish Holy Men.)

We commence to getting a new roof starting today!  HURRAY.  I pity the dogs who will have heart attacks from the sound of people on the roof and my husband who won't get any sleep during the rest of the week from the noise and all, but I am so happy about getting a new roof.  The birds that have started to build nests in the roof in various places where there are holes will not be as happy as I am either, I'm sure.  OH WELL!  WE'RE GETTING A NEW ROOF!  No more leaking drips except for the occupants of the house.

June 13, 2007 - Ooooooo, progress report on new roof!  Where would we be without the required dumpster to throw shingles in?  Dumpsters serve us every day, but do we ever take the time to tell them "Thank you, stinky old dumpster!"  No, we never do.   (Of course the lack of appreciation for dumpsters might stem from our deep feeling of guilt for filling up landfills all over the United States and the oceans and then there is the whole global warming complex to deal with...)

Here is how the roof looks in front (they have not started there yet...can you tell?)

Here is the back part where they've ripped the old shingles off and have put on the weather sealer/layer thingy (that's high tech Construction Talk, of course, and I am trying to impress you with my knowledge of such things...)

Last night I left work and came up to the first four corner stop.  I am all happy to be out of work and looking at the beautiful sky and the nice greens in the trees and fields around me, of course.  As I slowed to stop, I see this very nice black race type car.  "Oh, man, I've stepped on a lot of those in Hot Wheel and MicroMachine versions over the years!" was my first thought.  My second thought was, "The cost of that thing would feed a small third world nation for a year!"  It was then I noticed that all the guys in the all the cars waiting at the four way stop were either pointing with mouths agape or frozen at their position and not moving.  I scooted across the stop and went on my way.  When I got home I explained what it looked like to my youngest son, and he showed me a picture on line of what I had seen - it was a Lamborghini.  All I knew for sure was that it was flat and expensive and shiny and caused at least 6 men to revert to a drooling state at the four corners.  Amazing.  I doubt I could even begin to fit my left leg into one of those.  I bet the height and weight requirement to drive a Lamborghini is the same as for an F15 fighter pilot. 

I went over to hook up my Aunt's computer last night at her new apartment.  I hope I'm as feisty as she is when I'm 80.  (I hope I just live to be 80, forget the feisty part.)   Do you realize when I'm 80, I'll still have Led Zeppelin on the CD player and AC/DC blaring as I drive?   It is a thought that humors me to no end.  Old people rockin' out.  I find odd comfort in that. 

June 15, 2007 - The roof is almost done!!   They have been working 9 hour days on it, switching sides depending on where the sun is beating down the most.  Two nights ago when I pulled in the drive way and it was like 90 degrees out, I immediately offered the boys some ice water.  They gladly accepted.  Then they brought me a box of baby birds.  They said the day before they had found the nest with five babies in the underside of the roof and put the nest in the tree very close by.  "We checked them this morning but two were dead on the ground but these three survived..."  Now how can I say 'no' to a hard working, nipple pierced, ZZ Top bearded construction worker who is concerned about all living creatures - they actually seemed intent to SAVE the things.  "Oh my, thank you..." I murmured.  I was thinking, "They are just blackbirds - there are 62 million in my back yard as it is..."  Sigh.  I took the box out back to some shade and then hauled my daughter and son out to help me find worms.  I mean, they were STARVING!  We found a few worms for them and I smashed them up and shoved some down their throats, but since the ground was so dry it was no easy matter finding worms.  The whole while I'm complaining that I don't have the time nor the inclination to save these guys.  My son said, "Yeah, Mom, let 'em go...you can't save 'em..." and my daughter was quiet but supportive.  I left them out back there and then let the cats outside to see if they could 'help' the situation. 

After I fixed supper, I sat in my chair and my stomach hurt.  Actually, it was more like my uterus.  As a woman, the uterus works as a device to plague you with actual physical pain which in some cases leads to emotions that force you to do certain things.  I pondered the effort involved to save the babies with my head cocked to one side and that far away look in my eye.  "You're gonna do it, aren't you Mom?" one of the kids asked.   "Sigh, yes..."  I got up and fetched the little heifers from out back and brought them in.  I cleaned them up and put them in a warm blanket/nest.   (Did you know baby birds crap with massively intense force and velocity?  You could line up a bunch of baby birds on the enemies line and defeat their forces from the sheer force of the bird's bowel movements - they should consider this in Iraq.)  I called my niece Tori who's had a pretty good success rate at saving baby birds.   "Help Me, Obewan!" I pleaded with her.  She told me what to feed them and how often.  My sister called back a bit later to remind me NOT to get food in their nostrils.  "Where, pray tell, are their nostrils???" I asked.   She explained, and sure enough, I had those poor little guys just covered with food blocking vital air intake valves.  I cleaned them up again.  Sigh.  I lost the smallest one on Wednesday night, but he was doomed from the start.  The two strongest ones are doing OK I guess, but what do I know.  I just shove food down their throats when they scream at me and occasionally give them a drop or two of water and change their bedding every six seconds when they poop.  I have constant flashbacks to raising my own kids and think to myself that I never wanted to do it AGAIN.  I sat all day at work with my uterus just aching.  I told Doug about it.  "I have this guilt about NOT wanting to try to save them, Doug, but I can't NOT try at least to save them!!"  Doug acted like he understood but I did notice he was shaking his head in concern while he was walking away from me backwards.  Smile.   Baby birds stink, and that stench makes me have dry heaves, or did for two days.   This morning it wasn't so bad (if you keep them cleaned up and change their bedding.)  One of the little goobers even attempted to preen himself, which means to me that any day now they will be leaving for college I hope.  You know, I won't stop if I am going 60 miles an hour and hit a squirrel to try to save him...but you have to at least try to save baby birds if your roofer hands them to you like a child giving you a dandelion.  Beware of roofers bearing gifts, folks...

My son's last day of Jr. High was yesterday, and I must say it's so NICE not to wake him up in the morning!  That won't last too long as he will be working in the corn fields soon enough when it comes time, but for now - I appreciate the fact that I get the WHOLE morning to myself!  (Unless you count the birds screaming, or the cats meowing, or the dogs fighting, or the laundry that needs doing...)  Me bring home bacon - fry in pan - ug. 

June 16, 2007 - Houston, we have a new roof!  HURRAY!!  It looks pretty, but now the rest of the house looks like crap.  The house is crap, but it keeps us warm and happy, so all is good.  We will need to paint or do siding I think.  You just can't get a new roof without getting new windows and siding.   My husband's brother is in construction and can do the windows and siding.  I am just responsible for finding a bank we can rob to pay for it.  (Hahahah, you know I'm joking!  Bank - pshaw!  We go for Brink trucks!)  Smile.

Thing One and Thing Two are doing OK for baby birds, I guess.  When they hear my voice or my daughters they go NUTS.  I find the 'mother' instinct in me humorous, as I will hear baby birds at work or anywhere for that matter, and I panic and want to run to them and feed/check on them.  God Rocks to put such instincts in us all.  I have researched the heck out of raising wild baby birds, and frankly all information so far is very against trying to do it because humans suck at raising baby birds, hence the reason we don't poop 'em out ourselves.  I did find a nice page by a veterinarian that was most helpful.  Now I know the difference between a nestling and a fledgling.  A nestling is what I have right now - they have a fuzzy tufted naked look to them, and hopefully in a week or two they will be fledglings - hopping around like idiots and trying their wings out.  Then I can take 'em outside and see if they get their groove on, and I will never ever do this again. I swear to all reading. 

June 17, 2007 - My very own wee fledglings went to the beach on Friday.  I insisted they take and use sun screen.  They took it, but forgot to use it until half way through their beach adventure.  My youngest is burned up muchly.  Sigh.  He has never suffered a severe sunburn as I've always been around to slather him with sunscreen.  Leave the kids to their own devices, however, and they forget to slather therefore they burn.   The only 'smart' one was my oldest who has been burned once or twice in his life, so he kept a tee shirt on through out their time at the beach.  My daughter got a good burning on her back as well.  Sigh.  Youngest son has been feeling 'ill' and down and out for two days.  He even cancelled going to a friends house for the night which is unheard of.  You know he doesn't feel well when he does that!   Below are pictures before the kids cooked to a medium well doneness...

After far as my Thing One and Thing Two go - they seem to be growing and doing OK.  They are used to me manhandling them to clean them up.  I have become 'attached' and I regret that, because I've only had them for a few days.  Sigh.  Oh well.  I am just glad my own children can wipe on their own, that's all I got to say about that...

And now - my completed roof!  WEEE!   I'm a cheap date - just give me a new roof...and I'll probably make you cookies or something.

so much better than this, don't you think?...

June 19, 2007 - My darling grandbabies are NOT morning people.  They do not like to wake up fully before 7 a.m.   I made them a fort last night in a box with a lid made out of the things you cool cakes on.  Stewie is still very interested in the free meals on the table so I had to hunker the little birdies down.  This morning I was shocked to see they had a new layer of feathers!  Holy Crap!  Over night they had new stuff!  Amazing. 

June 20, 2007 - Well, we lost Thing Two this a.m.  He passed away.   Sigh.  He was feeling punky last night, so I hope we made his last hours as comfortable as possible.  Thing One continues to do well, but now that he's the only survivor, he is escorted around the house quite a bit by my youngest son.  My son sent me this message at work today out of the blue  ... "I have Burt at the desk and he is sleeping with the monkey."  

I burst out laughing.  It sounded like a code from some espionage movie, you know - something on the line of  "the dog barks at midnight."  It took me a second to realize "Burt" was the baby bird, and he really had a stuffed monkey near him for snuggling.  Oh my.   That little blurb of message gave me such joy.  The boys are bonding.  If Burt passes on, I will be so sad.   I've really gotten attached to him.   Every morning he has more and more feathers.  I am astonished and amazed.  Scroll back and look at what they looked like when we got them!!  I really hopes he survives but I never want do this again, ever.   Keeping a young one alive no matter what gender or species is stressful, and frankly I've been there and done that.

Speaking of parental stress, my youngest was supposed to go to Cedar Point with his 8th grade class yesterday.  I didn't let him go.  His blisters were oozing and he was flaming red with itch and pain.  He was quite mad at me all morning, sending me random instant messages at work declaring his anger.  However, when I got home, he was "OK with it" as I think he realized he couldn't have had any fun with pus oozing out all over the place.  I fretted all day about it - not letting him go.  It was, after all, his 8th grade trip.  I was, after all, losing 70 non-refundable bucks on the deal.  I felt sick to my stomach all day until a fellow friend/parent came over and told me a story about his daughter, and suddenly the stomach ache went away.  Just hearing that all parents have to make tough decisions made me release my worry.  Between him and raising Burt, I will get an ulcer. 

My Aunt Ruth died this week.  She was 91.   I have fond memories of her when we did get to visit with them.  Her husband, Uncle Fred, was cool too.  The more family members that pass on, the more you feel your own 'mortality clock' ticking.  I am so thankful I have had such a wonderful life - great friends, true loves, fantastic kids, very few regrets, and 46 years of sheer amazement at life.  Look at all the pretty colors! 

June 25, 2007 - This was the weekend of the Shed.  My husband began assembling the new shed to replace the one crumbled up by last month's storm.  It was a family event.  I played scrub nurse - assembling the screw and washers and handing said screws to the roof bound husband as well as manning the nut application on the inside of the shed.  (I have a knack for getting the nuts on the back of the screws, apparently.)  I also held stuff (drill bits and the drill itself) and was responsible for battery recharging.  The boys helped with the bracing stuff and all in all, it went very smoothly with only a tad amount of swearing.  So much nicer than when we put of the original shed several years ago.  That was terrifying.  When my insurance lady asked, "Do you know what it takes to put one of those things up?" I had to admit I did but told her I tried to repress those types of memories. 

Burt the Bird is growing up fast and flapping his wings and pooping with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns and hopping here and there.  I fed him worms over the weekend and left him outside a lot (monitored, of course.)  He is in no hurry to fly, but he does 'try' - he's flapped into walls several times.  Now all he wants to do is eat worms and my poor substitute of smashed up cat food pales in comparison.  He sleeps like a 'real' bird now with his head tucked into his wing.  He listens to the other birds outside and occasionally will 'talk back' - but mainly he sits there with his head cocked to one side as he nips at grass and small flying insects.  He has yet to catch one, however, while I've been watching, but at least he knows he can try.  

My daughter and youngest son are still peeling from their burns over a week ago.  Oh my.  Flakes of it EVERYWHERE.  I swept the living room furniture and swept out the bathroom due to the amount of dead skin I could see.  It must be a challenge for young ones to see how big of a piece of dead skin they can rip off intact.  I think I remember doing that as well, now that I mention it.  Still, when you are the one cleaning it up, it becomes officially GROSS.  

The boys and I finished cleaning the old apartment for my Aunt and Uncle.  They are officially 'done' with that one.  I am so happy.  I am glad they are closer to me - only four minutes away if I go over the speed limit.  As my youngest said when telling his Dad about the cleaning adventure, "We busted it out, Man!"  We did.  We went in and cleaned with gusto.  I am proud of my boys. 

I worked off site on Friday, so it feels like going in to work today will be like going back after a vacation which means I don't really want to go back, but one has to eat, so I'll go but frankly, Scarlett, I'd rather stay home and teach Burt all about life and which bugs to hang with and which bugs are bullies and how not to trust dogs and cats as he has learned here in my house.  Jake has taken a personal interest in Burt, almost Nanny-like.  He fends of the cats and will stand over Burt watching for the cats when we have Burt out on a chair.  Burt naturally assumes that big black nose of Jake's must contain food, as he tries often to beg for food from it.  Never a boring moment in my house. 

June 26, 2007 - Ah, parenthood.  Just when I wish Burt would fly away and leave me alone, he does something cute.  Last night I was out front with him near the bird feeder, which in my mind is like a church social for birds as he's bound to pick up something good from watching all the other birds peck and eat and poop and stuff -  I surely can't teach him that kind of thing myself as I don't poop well without hot coffee prior to the act...but I digress...  While we're sitting there, I tried to feed him.   (I purchased night crawlers from a bait shop.  I got sick of digging up my flower bed in search of the elusive worm.  I figure bait shop worms were the McDonalds of the bird world.)  He kept hopping away from me while I tried to feed him in a cocky way -  a show of independence on his part, I'm sure.  Off to our west, there was a very loud BAM from someone playing with fireworks (I assume it was fireworks, you always wonder if you should call 911 or the like when you hear stuff like that...)  Burt suddenly 'flew' to my lap!  Hahaha.  That BOOM noise was enough to make him want "Mom."  When the second BOOM happened, he flew up to my pocket.  Then he was hanging there peeping at me and flapped up onto my shoulder.  He snuggled down and immediately went to sleep.  I imagine it is all quite overwhelming for the little guy.  I didn't move for 10 minutes as I let him snooze on my shoulder.  I had to move eventually as a herd of ants were making their way up into my shorts on a field trip.  All this time I'm cussing at the little dude to fly off and leave me alone only to find out he NEEDS ME!  He really needs me!   Sigh.  Critters, go figure.  Right now he's out at the bird social club again - I have been leaving him out there for about an hour a morning to have him see all the birds in the yard picking up worms and getting stuff from the drive way, etc. 

June 29, 2007 - My best friend Vickie sent me a surprise the other day in the mail!   She gets soap from my soap lady up here, and she had my soap lady send me a bunch of bars of soap!  I love that stuff.  It's so delicious and creamy and makes you feel like you are getting a mini vacation every time you shower.  Plus, you can smell it on your skin all day (mildly - nothing screaming stinky-ness and knocking over coworkers.)  THANK YOU VICKIE!  It couldn't have come at a better time as I have 'cycled' in and it's been a moody week for me and any form of pampering (or in this case -   PAMPRIN as well) is accepted with a grateful heart. 

Well, Burt is officially GONE.  My son the Bird Nanny (seen on Fox Family Channel on Friday's at 9) had him outside several times yesterday during the day as we have been doing for a week now, and would instant message me with "Burt Updates..."   - Burt had flown to the back yard...Burt followed my oldest to his car when he left for work...Burt was hanging on the screen...

Then around three p.m., he sent me a message - "Mom, Burt's gone..."  I had told my son to practice his trombone yesterday afternoon and he decided, no doubt, after four measures of music to check on Burt (to get out of playing of course.)

My heart fluttered.  "Did you look out back?  Did you call him?  Are the cats out?"  I fired questions to my son via instant messaging.  "Yes, Yes, and NO!" my son wrote back.   He walked the yard calling for Burt.  When I got home I walked the yard calling for Burt.  After I made supper, I walked the yard calling for Burt.   Before I went to bed I went out and called for Burt.  I also cocked my head and with my degraded ear functionality tried to listen for him.  Of course every squeak and peep noise I heard ALL NIGHT made me think it was Burt wanting back in.   This morning I walked the yard calling for Burt.  Since the 6:00 a.m. hour is the time all the birds come out for worms and to come to the bird feeder, I was at the screen door A LOT calling for Burt. 

I hope Burt wasn't eaten by an owl or by a hawk.  I hope Burt just up and decided it was time for him to fly.  Last night my youngest said, "Man, it's hard not to worry about him - he didn't know how to eat or do anything on his own!  It was kind of nice having him around."   Awwwwww.  Sigh.  I will trust in the fact God put in some kick butt instincts in all bird's brains and Burt is off somewhere being what he was meant to be all along. 

Funny how one can forget all the phenomenal amount of bird crap all over the place and the hours digging for worms in a second's time and just remember the 'good times' had by all.  (I will now burst out in the song "Sunrise, Sunset" - feel free to leave...)

The only 'plus' I see at this time is the fact I had time to pluck my chin hairs this morning.  All my free time (normally spent managing my chin forest) was devoted to Burt, so I had quite the goatee built up.  I would gladly become a stunt double for Grizzly Adams just to know Burt was OK, however.  

July 2, 2007 - I insist on talking to whoever keeps making time go by so fast.  Over half the year is gone.  When did this happen?  I would like to speak to the person in charge of time!  Please, I beseech you - SLOW DOWN! 

My youngest spent the weekend with a friend so it's been quite quiet 'round these parts.  This week, however, kicks in the extra excitement of marching band practice for the wee boy.   PLUS - he should get a call soon to start working the corn fields.  This will be his summer of discontent.  At least he won't be bored.  Next week my daughter gets her wisdom teeth pulled.  Non stop fun and excitement.  Hold me back.   It should be interesting - my daughter's first run in with 'real' drugs.  If she says anything goofy, I'll be sure to report it here...

No sign of Burt the Bird (or as we called him by his tribe name - "Turdy") this weekend, but I swear I saw him at the bird feeder with the other birds.  I wish him well and may the bird force be with him.  Maybe it was meant to be that I got to raise Turdy.  Maybe it reminded me I'm needed?  Maybe Turdy will save a life of someone important that is due to save the world?  My friend Dan says that next summer I'll be out working in the yard and this large black bird will land on my shoulder and it will be Turdy (and I think to myself that if that ever happened I'd keel over from a heart attack from the sheer surprise of it...)  As long as he doesn't peck my eyes out, I guess that would be kind of cool.

I have been feeling depressed as of late, and I can assume most of it is due to my monthly.  I have a house, wonderful kids, and I don't feel like killing anyone lately, so I have no reason to be 'really' depressed.  We all have jobs and we're all relatively healthy.  No reason AT ALL why I should be depressed.  I am assuming large doses of Pamprin can fix this issue.  We all get depressed however, from time to time.  Humans have a special niche in their mental tissue that allows for depression.  Learning to deal with that particular human trait is an art form.  We all deal with it in our own way.   We got an official Weight Watcher's scale this weekend as we had killed off our other digital scale.  I am not upset by that, as I've not gained any weight (nor lost) so I know that isn't contributing to my mental state.  Oh well, this too shall pass like so much fiber in the intestinal tract. 

My husband got hit by a fork lift on Friday morning at work.  Nothing drastic - it did cut his leg in one spot and pushed him back into the skid contents so he probably achieved some very odd contortions of his back muscles that he only dreamed of in nightmares, but other than that he seemed fine.  If that had happened to him 60 pounds ago, I can only imagine the damage it would have caused.  I have thought about taking extra life insurance out on him, as he seems to be a magnet lately for accidents.  This fork truck accident was not his fault as the hand burning incident was, but still...now every time he calls and says, "Guess what" I always ask if he's in the emergency room.  What a vote of confidence on my part, aye?

So, I will go conquer my world as I know it.  One can only take one day at a time and do the best they can do with that day.  Don't forget to stop and smell the roses!

July 3, 2007 - I saw the most adorable thing on the way into town yesterday - a young girl on a bike had stopped to pick up her friend (who was male) at a corner near where I was driving.   He got on the seat behind her and when she went to take off, he was going to grab her, but for a split second he didn't know where to put his hands.  Hahahaha.   You could see him stretch his arms out to grab her waist, but then thought against it, then he was going to grab her shoulders, then he just wasn't sure WHERE to put his hands.  In an innocent pre-pubescent way, it was quite adorable.

I was just crushed last night when my daughter was telling us all about moving into her new apartment in August.   She said that I had made her feel guilty about the price of the dorms last school season and she decided then she would get an apartment so I wouldn't have to pay for a dorm.  I felt deflated instantly and almost cried. (My Pamprin had worn off from earlier, so I had no control from my neck up...)  I didn't once think I was trying to trick her into feeling guilty about me having to pay for her room and board, so this hurt me - only because I am so dense and naive sometimes.  There are times in my life I could be standing right next to a black hole and honestly be shocked when suddenly I'm pulled into it, as I never noticed it to begin with.  "Oh, a black hole?   Where did that come from?"  Then again, I tried to raise the kids to know that only they can choose to feel guilty over things, no one can force them to feel guilty.  A Catch22 of sorts, I suppose.  I think I stressed to her often the cost of college to inspire her to do well - which she did marvelously by the way - and to keep her focused.  I didn't complain about money to make her feel like I was losing weight from lack of food due to paying for her education because I'm certainly NOT losing weight from lack of food due to ANYTHING.  She also doesn't feel like she has a spot in our house anymore.  That hurt the worse - because it's a small house, and when one goes and another one come back, it does cause issues of 'personal' space.  Sigh.  A parent always wants to think they are the haven for their kids - that the kids are free to come for help and assistance and advice any time.  She did get a lecture about coming to us for help if she needs it after she gets out there in the big world - "NEVER go without!  We are here, there is food here - if you need something, ASK!  We can't throw stones, as we live in a glass house - we won't judge you - NEVER feel like you can't ask us for assistance..."  (The lecture went on and on and and droned out like a typical lecture would;  You get the idea.)   This lecture was also directed at my oldest son, who was sitting there trying to be indifferent to the situation.  I still have one more kid to go on this lecture stuff.   I hope I don't go all Alzheimer's on him - and the lectures turn out to be off the wall and spastic.  (They sort of are now - just due the fact I can go off on a tangent with the blink of an eye, but all roads lead back to the originating brain cell eventually.) 

I am happy she will be in her 'own' place, though.  It makes a difference.  It starts the whole independence thing off...when I was her age I was already married and crappin' out kids so I'm ever so happy she can have time to be 'her' and on her own.  I missed that.   She will have her own 'space' and love it.  Took me years to get it, as I had to grow up with my kids.  I wouldn't trade that NOW for the world, mind you.   Back then, though - I was depressed and sad and missing 'myself'...but as Dorothy once said, "Auntie Em, Auntie Em, we're not in Kansas any more..." which has nothing to do with this situation whatsoever.

My main worry now is her financial issue coming up - will she be able to carry a full load of classes PLUS work enough to support herself in an apartment?  Motherly sigh.  We will find out.   Learning never stops.  I don't have "back juju" vibes from my uterus which is a sure indication of disaster to come as any mother knows, so I know all will be well, this I know. 

A guy came around last night (door to door salesman) selling some cleaner.  He gave me a demo outside as the dogs would have ripped his clothes off from excitement inside.  It was pretty cool cleaner, and I admire anyone who can go door to door in this age where we're scared to even let our own cats in the house after a night out of the town.  After purchasing a bottle, I cleaned stuff.  I was amazed at how well it worked on glass.  I cleaned the front of some cupboards and the back door.  I cleaned stuff in the bathroom.  I killed bugs with it.  Apparently this magic potion will also get stains out of clothes, but my theory is, "Why start now?" 

July 5, 2007 - It was a marvelous 4th of July!  The parade was wonderful.  I cried to see my youngest marching, as we all know marching band music just melts me.  There was also an A10 fly over (by two jets) which made me jump and down for joy.  I didn't know they were going to do it, so it was a thrill.  I heard them first, and knew right away.  "JETS!" I screamed and clapped and started bouncing around like an idiot.  After the parade, the whole family went to dinner and that was fun.   Then we came home and I took a nap.  (I live life on the edge!) 

We went to the local fireworks later in the day.  We parked in the parking lot behind one of the schools and walked to the field near where they set off the fireworks.  On the way to the field, we all had a handful of lawn chairs or coolers.  I felt my hair (I thought) brushing up against my right ear.  I went to brush it away because it was 'bugging' me, when I realized, too late, that it WAS a bug and not my hair.  The little rat turd went right into my ear canal!  I dropped my purse and coolers and stopped dead in the sidewalk.  (Blocking many people behind us.)  I announced the fact a bug was in my ear to the general public but mainly directed at my husband and kids.  In a split second after realizing a bug had gotten in, I had flash backs to giving birth.   If the bug got in it would come out, as babies fly out of a small holes all the time, so I didn't panic, but having a moving live creature in your ear is NOT pleasant.   The ear the bug chose was my 'bad' ear which is ultra sensitive to pain to begin with even though I can't hear out of it that well.  There I was, stopped dead in a very busy sidewalk with my head down and cocked to the right trying to grab something out of my ear.  I asked my husband to look in there.  "Can you see it?   Can you see it?" I pleaded.  "No!  I don't see anything!" he lamented.  (Later the family said they were not so sure I had a bug in my ear as they were kind of sure I finally had gone over the 'deep end' as it were...)

The family got off the sidewalk dragging all the stuff I dropped.  I moved off the sidewalk as well, to let normal people pass.  The little rat bastard bug went further in, and the pain on my eardrum was terrible.  "You RAT BASTARD!" I said loudly. I scanned the ground for a small twig to stick in my ear - thinking the bug would grab on to that.   I tried and tried to get it out and there were times I swear I could feel tiny little legs in my finger's grasp.  The thing kept either trying to turn around or clawing my ear drum.  The pain!  It filled my ear cavity and it felt very 'fuzzy' and all I could think of was that it was a bee.  I finally ended up pushing up and pinching him in place best I could so he wouldn't move.  I looked at my family - "We have to get me to the emergency room or somewhere with small tweezers of sorts..." I said.  They didn't disagree, but they looked at each other in a quandary. We were meeting my daughter's boyfriend at the field. 

My oldest son said, "The ambulance just went by on the way to the fireworks area..."  There was also a branch where police/ambulance were housed in the town we were in.  "Take me over there..." I said to my husband, "...and you kids just go down to the field and set up and we'll meet you there."  The kids grabbed all the chairs and coolers and started out toward the field.  My husband grabbed my elbow to steer me back to the car.  The bug kept trying to go in further or turn around to come out even with me attempting to hold him in place.  I didn't wanna squish him too hard - didn't want a squished bug in my ear!  "OUCH!" I'd yell, "You rat bastard!"  People were just staring and moving out of my way...

Mind you, this whole episode was near a car with a family in it that was waiting to get out of their car and head for the fireworks field.  Here I was contorting on the sidewalk just outside their car.  They didn't move.  They had looks on their faces as if they were witnessing a terrible car wreck or a nuclear explosion.  The stayed in their car the whole time with their mouths agape.  I don't blame them.  I am sure it looked odd that a nearly six foot man had my head in a death grip looking in my ear and then me shaking my head and yelling, "Come out you rat bastard!  Come out!"  I felt bad for them, although now remembering their expression it makes me laugh out loud.   They were sort of trapped...they couldn't pull out due to the mass amount of traffic and they sure were not getting out of their car!  Hahahahaa...

I released the pressure on the bug because my hand was cramping and I suddenly I could HEAR again.  I pushed into my husband and said, "Can you see him now?  I think he backed out!"   So there were were again in the middle of the sidewalk with my husband grabbing my head and looking in my ear.  "YES!  I see it!" he cried, and grabbed the side of my head with his left hand, wrenched it to the left and started trying to grab the bug.  I can't even begin to tell you about the crowd and their reaction.  I didn't see any cell phones popping out to call the police, but people gave us a wide berth and steered their kids clear.  "Did you get it?  Did you get it?" I pleaded.  "Not yet!" he said firmly.  "Got HIM!" he finally said in a triumphant voice.  "Damn, baby - IT'S HUGE!"  He flung the thing on the sidewalk and it was a huge beetle!  "Die!" he said and it sounded just like Mel Gibson screaming "FREEDOM!" from 'Braveheart' as he stepped on it.  Here is an internet picture of what it kind of looked like, and frankly, Scarlett, YUCK!

Needless to say I was thrilled.  My husband said, "Well, if we were gonna trick the kids into carrying EVERYTHING, this was as good a way as any, I guess..."  I was so happy.  I also blew snot bubbles from an abrupt burst of laughter when I turned and saw the family in the car was STILL there with that look on their faces.  "Shall we go to the field?" I asked.  "Why yes, shall we?" my husband said and linked his arm under mine.  "You know, I really wasn't looking forward to going to the emergency room!" he sighed.  "You weren't looking forward to it?  I wasn't looking forward to it either!" I laughed.  "Hi, My name is Sandy, and I have a bug in my ear!" 

We caught up the boys and recounted the beetle extraction.  Dad was very proud that he "finally got a grip on the bug's butt and pulled it out to save the day..."

"That's just weird, Mom!" they said.  My youngest was shaking his head, "Mom, ONLY YOU!!!..." he laughed.  My ear drum still aches, mind you.  I assume he used those pinchers on my ear drum, or just the fact I knew he was IN THERE makes it hurt.   Either way, it was quite the exciting night.  I am still having 'willies' and shivers when I think of it.  Every time a strand of hair brushed up against my ear, I shiver.

The fireworks were marvelous and no more creatures tried to use any of my orifices as a condo.  Prior to the fireworks my youngest and I played Frisbee until he fell on it and broke it.  We had fun watching the crowd as well.  It was (all in all) a marvelous day.

I wonder what ever happened to the family trapped in their car?   Hmmmmm.....

July 13, 2007 - It is beautiful Friday morning and I'm enjoying the quiet.  My youngest has a day off from detasseling plus he's taking tomorrow off as well due to prior obligations.   It's nice not getting him up at 5:30 a.m. and taking him down to the corner to meet the corn bus. 

It was quiet until Taffy hwarfed up a fur ball just now.  There is nothing funnier to me than a cat coughing up a fur ball for some reason.  That and people falling down.   Sometimes that can strike me as hilarious, even if I'm helping you get up and holding your gash closed so you don't bleed to death until the medics arrive - I will laugh at you.

Taffy had an 'incident' on Wednesday.  My husband went to move his truck and as soon as he started it, he hear a THWAPPIDDY THWAPPIDDY sound from the motor.  He turned the truck off, of course, and saw Taffy the Cat shoot out as well as mass amounts of fur.  Taffy was a bit dazed but able to run off.  I looked for him when I got home from work and then again after dinner but couldn't find him.  He did come limping into the house when my daughter got home from work that night.  There is a nice cut on his back hind leg and we treated that.  Other than the gaping hole in his leg, he seems fine.  I couldn't feel anything broken, but I'm no vet - so he could be near death for all I know.   How can an 8 year old cat FORGET that engines are NOT a good place to take a nap?   Sigh.

I worked from home yesterday because my daughter had her wisdom teeth out in the morning and I wanted to be the one who took her for this event.  They can do it so fast now - 45 minutes tops!   Ah, modern medicine.  She got 'laughing gas' and they sedated her with an I.V. drip of some type of drug.  She is doing pretty good except for the tooth they had to break and dig out on her bottom right side;  That is swelled up like a gopher's face full of food.  ICE PACKS are marvelous things. 

As I was sitting in the waiting room, it dawned on me that it had been 26 years since I had my wisdom teeth out.   I had mine out when I was 20 and a Mom already.  I remember being on the couch for a few days from the pain of it...but I don't remember much else beside not sleeping during the whole process until they were done then suddenly I'm ready to sleep, so when it came time to sign the check I vaguely remember that I ruined about six checks by my half dazed attempts at a signature until they eventually said they would just "bill me" and sent me on my way with my husband.  They didn't use an I.V. drip on me - they used demerol and seconal pills.  There is not much 'wisdom' in teeth that have to be pulled out, now is there?  "Wisdom Teeth" - the name confuses me.

The memory of my wisdom teeth extraction is fading but the fact it was 26 YEARS AGO still looms in my mind.  Every story and reminiscence is starting to be "oh that was 25+ years ago..." as it is with all of my friends and close cousins.  We are all near or at AARP paying membership status.  Even that doesn't bother me so much - age itself - as age is relative and it all depends on how you feel mentally and all, but the span of time and the effects and changes to our bodies - that has een quite obvious to me as of late.  The skin changes (it puckers and droops and it starts looking like a topographical map of the United States) and the joints don't function as well (knee joints and the like - wanted to clarify that for all you hippies out there - smile.)  Eyes take a turn for the worse and you are reading the LARGE PRINT versions of anything you can get your hands on and your hearing goes...  I know this is the natural progression of a human's life, but it kind of bums you out if you ponder it too long.  There comes a time when you stand in front of the mirror naked and scream, "Oh my gosh!  I have my Mother's Butt!!"  It's bound to happen, but sometimes the shock of it must be addressed.   

There, I won't ponder it any longer.  I just had to make a comment on it to shut my own brain up as my brain wanted to discuss this phenomenon of age for a while now and I just wouldn't listen to it.

A note to people grocery shopping today - if Little Debbie snack cakes are "10 for $10" - just keep walking past and don't look back.  Believe me on this one - I know what I'm talking about here...

July 20, 2007 - Taffy seems to have come out with flying colors from his bout with the truck engine.   We treated him for a few days with peroxide on his boo boo and he limped for a day or two, but seems fine now.  He has been steering clear of motor vehicles ever since - go figure.  Taffy still tries to lure Stewie out and get him to go to the road, however.  Maybe he was daydreaming of killing Stewie the day he forgot to get out of the motor.  Cat conspiracies.  I bet there is even a feline Mafia somewhere.

My youngest has been doing a fine job working in the corn fields.  I must admit with a bit of pride that he's a hard worker in the 'real world' - considering you have to use a taser on him here at home to get him to scoop kitty litter.  A week or so ago my youngest who had been instructed several times by a parental unit NOT TO TAKE HIS CELL PHONE IN HIS PANTS POCKET IN TO A FIELD OF FREE ROAMING SEED CORN lost said cell phone in a corn field.   He has walked home ever since from the drop off point "as punishment" to himself so he says.  So twice in the last two months, Mom has been RIGHT and I'm sure my son is not happy - no kid likes it when a parent 'preaches' about stuff and the "stuff" turns out to be fairly accurate.  "Wear sunscreen!" I preached before they went to the beach.  "I know!" he said but he didn't and got fried and missed his 8th grade trip to Cedar Point.  "Don't take your phone into the corn field!  You'll lose it!" I commanded.  "I KNOW!" he replied, but he did and by now some cow probably has it in it's third stomach.

I ordered him a new phone which he got last night.  He was 'dying' with out his cell phone.  He almost cried when we got this new one.  He is paying me back for this new one, however.  He didn't even argue about that fact.  He realizes it's his fault that he lost the first one.  Since he is paying me for this new one, he had more input in to what type of phone he got.  He was almost girly giddy last night.  He did happy dances all over the living room.  He hugged me every five seconds.  It's hard to lord the errors of their ways over their heads when they are saying, "Oh MOMMY, I love you!" 

July 22, 2007 - To continue with the 'phone' entry above:  Later in the evening after I thought my youngest had gone to sleep and I was content to be reading the news and 'ending' my day, he came back down again to explain to me some weird theory he had about his "lucky" numbers.  (He was still hyper from getting his new phone.)  He was talking fast and furious about how "if you got to the hospital to have me at 10:10" and "I was born at 11:11, then you was there 1 hour and 1 minute and that is a lot of ones, maybe like eight or nine ones, and those must be my lucky numbers...." 

He went on and on about ones, zeros, and nines as lucky numbers.  I was trying to listen to him, honestly I was.  However, as he was rambling on, a remote cell in my brain got involved with the conversation without my permission and this cell reminded other brain cells in the greater tri-lobe area about a TV a cartoon show (Futurama) where the robots went to a robot church and they prayed in ones and zeros.  After remembering this show and smiling internally, as it was a funny show, my brain continued to think about ones and zeros being related to machine language for computers, and my brain considered how we can't do much anymore in our lives without computers, calculators, and technology.  Another brain cell, obviously from the 'motherly and overbearing' cluster part of the brain, over heard the word "calculator" and immediately took over my mouth controls and neck muscles, and forced me to cock my heat to the left and blurt out to my son "Where is your calculator from school?" 

"What?" my son said.  He had still be going on in a hyperish type way, and this question took him off guard.  "Man,Mom!...that was out the side hatch!" he said. 

"Where is your calculator?" I demanded.  Once the motherly brain cells band together as a pack, they will not let you veer off their chosen thought pattern - any mother reading this will attest to that fact. 

"I don't know where it is!" he practically screeched. 

"Find it!" I commanded. 

"I don't know where it is!" he continued to back away from me. 

"Where was it on the last day of school?"

"In my backpack....I guess!" 

"Where is your backpack?" 

"You made me throw it out by the burn pile!!"  (This is tradition for us.  After the end of a major career, like Junior High or High School, we burn in a bonfire all unneeded papers and backpacks in a ritual to release the person to continue on with their life...guess you'd have to be here but it's very cleansing...This ritual also works well when trying to free the mind of old boyfriends, bad essays, mortgages, you name it.  If it can be burned...BONFIRE.)

"I told you to GET WHAT YOU NEEDED OUT OF YOUR BACK PACK THEN THROW IT OUT BY THE BURN PILE!" By now I'm sure I was starting to raise off my seat and levitate and I wouldn't doubt it if my head was spinning and my eyes glowing.  This was all started by a conversation being overheard by a brain cell that probably had nothing better to do than cause trouble.   I was aware of this the whole time I was turning into 'possessed psycho mom' but I couldn't stop.  "Do you know how much those T84s COST?" I spewed forth with a mouthful of something that looked like pea soup, no doubt.

"I will pay for it!" he insisted and he cringed near the bedroom door.  "I don't know where it is!  You told me to put my backpack out by the burn pile and I did.  You didn't tell me to take out my calculator!" 

"You don't NEED your calculator?" I asked in a very sarcastic way.  "You already owe me for a phone and now you claim you will pay for a new calculator?  Bwa Ha Ha Ha Ha!   Is all your corn detasseling money going to go towards covering your lack of thought and blatant stupidity?"  (I believe the theme music from the movie 'Damien - The Omen' kicked in right about here as well...)

"Mom, Please!" my son pleaded...

"Go out to the burn pile and look in your backpack!" I commanded.

"It's 10:30 at night, I'm not going out there!  There are raccoons and wild deer out there..."

That statement sort of pulled me out of the possessed Mom state, and I sat and thought a second.  "In the morning before you go to work, you're going out there to look." I said flatly.   "Now go to bed."  He scampered off like a frightened chipmunk.  

I, on the other hand, being anal and all and just off a fresh rage of 'Possessed Momness' couldn't stand the thought of a near $100 calculator spending one more night outside, so I grabbed a flashlight and went and fought off the raccoons and wild deer and got it out of his backpack.  After spending a night in the house drying out, it seems to work fine.   He did the ultimate mathematical test in the morning to confirm it still worked well.  "See, 8 times 8 equals 64.  It's fine...um, 8x8 does equal 64, right?" he asked.  "Yes, dear.  It does." 

July 29, 2007 - Today we take youngest to get signed in and frisked for camp.  (In this evil world we live in they have to check to make sure no one brings weapons or illegal drugs or old body parts or bombs and such to camp.)  It never ceases to amaze me...we drop them off on a Sunday, and when we drive up to get them the next Saturday they will have worked out a whole marching band show.  This is his first time at band camp.  I hope he has a hoot. 

Our band director is leaving us.  His last act will be to get the kids through band camp, then he's off.   I don't blame the guy - the hours are long and arduous and for 9 years now he's not really had all the help he could use.  Lack of funding  of schools sucks.   He's been responsible for Middle School bands and High School bands plus marching band, plus...the list goes on.  That wasn't too bad considering he was single and young, but then he got married a year or two ago and I doubt they've even had time to introduces themselves let alone think about having kids of their own, etc.  Sigh.   My youngest son was very sad at the news, thinking that now there was no reason to continue on with band.  "You're committed at least for this semester coming up..." I reminded him.  "After that you can make your decision to stay in music or leave it."  I pray they find someone who is good with the kids and inspires them and captures their attention the first semester he's/she's there and that my youngest stays in band.  I think music is so important in one's life.  I will always regret not being able to take band in school when I was young.  Sigh. 

This last week was TERRIBLE.   I was just swamped at work and drained of what little brains I had left.   Friday at five p.m. didn't come fast enough.  We had two people on vacation and the other two were over at another plant for the most part rewiring the place.   PLUS, I was PMS'ing to boot.  Not a good combo.  I think the PMS just created extra stress that really wasn't true stress last week.  "Fake" stress is the worst kind of stress, because it feels real and when you try to be rational about it all you sort of know it isn't real and it's "fake" - but then again, as a female you are never quite sure if it is or isn't real, so it's all processed as actual stress just to be safe.  (If you think that makes no sense, try being FEMALE for a few months...)  My daughter and I went to get our hair washed and styled and played with Thursday night.  I could feel myself melting into the sink when Terri washed my hair.  Seriously - I had been so stressed and muscles had been so tight that when I did relax finally, I literally felt like I was melting.  When Terri was blow drying my hair, I almost felt drunk.  She got one heck of a tip, let me tell you.   Nothing relaxes Sandy like having her hair played with.

The family was wonderful last week.  Hubby got up and made dinner each night early because youngest son had to be to band practice by six p.m.  He also cleaned and swept and kept the laundry caught up.  My daughter kicked in on some duties that her younger brother normally performs to help out as well, since he was still getting some half days in detasseling.  All in all, now that I'm coherent again and I can recognize such things, they pulled together as a herd well and I am very proud of them. 

Considering the week I had last week, I only binged on food once in a stress fit of eating, and that was last Monday night, where I ate all of my extra points allotted a week in Weight Watchers in one night.  I had done good all day until almost midnight when I couldn't sleep because I had one heck of a case of hemorrhoids.  Ouch!  So of course eating solves everything, right?  Even hemorrhoids.  That and a nice hot bath.  I can't do cartwheels yet because I'm not committed anymore to losing weight.  I have not given up, but the last few weeks I have not made an effort to even try to lose more.   Maybe that is giving up?  I think it's more like being lazy to be honest.  Trying to cook and eat healthy is hard and takes some thought, and I've not let any of my brain cells think about it much.  I have to watch it, because if I act like I 'gave up' the whole family takes that attitude.  Sigh. 

I have to get Stella fixed before the end of the year.  She's pissing me off.  Hernias should be illegal.  The doctor doesn't want to fix Stella until I lose another 20 pounds.   Being lazy and giving up on losing weight is NOT getting Stella put back in place.   Seriously, though - I would love to watch the procedure.  If all that intestinal stuff is out and about where it shouldn't be, how do they get it to go back in where it should be?  Didn't something else take it's place by now?  Wouldn't other organs have decided to take that space for their own?  I dread it, though, when Stella does get put back into place.  She takes up a big space where she shouldn't now and all of that area will just sag once she's back in.  That is the reason the doctor wants to wait until I lose more.  Less of a sag to deal with I think, or one that's handled better post surgery.  I guess if hernias are all I have to fret about, then my life is pretty darned good, aye?

My oldest son was in a wedding last weekend.  My oh My, he does look good in a tux!  (He's the short one in the middle of this handsome set of males!)

Below is a picture of my family, Simpsonized.  They have a web site where you can turn a picture of yourself into a Simpson, and I took the opportunity to do so.  So if we were all cartoons drawn by Matt Groening, this is what we'd look like.

The sandhill crane family has finally brought their kids up to the main bird feeder this year.  Normally they would have been up sooner, but all families are different.  They now EXPECT me to feed them, which I find a bit offensive.  Normally a family of cranes will be upset that I try to pay attention to them, but these guys stand outside and wait for me in the morning.  When I say the key words of "Hi You Guys" they know it's time to eat.  They don't even care that I'm out there.  Not good.  They should at least fake being flustered by a human.  The only time I saw Daddy crane the least bit upset was when Stewie the Cat sat in the window and watched them eating at the feeder.   Daddy almost took the whole window out trying to go after Stewie.

Ah, it's been so nice to sit here in the quiet this morning.  I got up at 3 a.m. because of the pain from my monthly, so I did the dishes and a load of wash to get things unkinked.  I don't get much alone time anymore.  I am sure I will be getting plenty of alone time in the future when the kids are all gone and I'm in some nursing home, so I shouldn't wish for it now, of course, but there are times it's nice not to have to listen to anyone or talk to anyone or worry about anyone.  It's too early for the Crane Mafia Family to be demanding food and too early for the dogs to move yet.  They are happy to be sleeping on the couch and having dreams of their own.  They make small barking noises and are trying to run in their sleep.  The only other person awake is Stewie, who's chasing a moth and tipping things over in the process.  He's just not all that coordinated for a cat.  I think I will take this time to get on line and email my friends and family as I've totally ignored the computer all week.  So I'm off - (but we knew that.)

August 6- You may ask yourself, "What the heck is that?"   That is an artist's rendition of what Grand Rapids Michigan looks like at 4 a.m.  Orange barrels and CONSTRUCTION EVERYWHERE!!  We left at 3 a.m. on Saturday morning to go to Petoskey to pick up youngest son at band camp.  Normally this is a straight shot north on US 131, mind you.  However, when we got to Grand Rapids past "the S curve" it was alive with construction workers and detours and blinky lights on orange barrels and one lanes and ... chaos.  We spent the good part of a half hour touring various areas of Grand Rapids by mistake as I couldn't tell what was US 131 vs NOT US 131 and we looped off three different times to previously unseen sections of the city.  The first time I took an orange barrel-lined exit by mistake, it was kind of funny.  The kids made fun of me.  The second time was just frustrating, as there was no way you could tell where you were going and why. The best I could do was return the way I came and hope for the best. The third time was funny again because by then we were convinced we'd never find our way out of the construction hell and my oldest son made me laugh by explaining the difference between an exit and a cement divider (which I had at one time mistaken for a possible exit out of the barrel jungle.)  The little jaunts around the greater Grand Rapids area added a half hour to our trip.  Sigh.  

We did get out of there eventually and ran into a few other massive construction projects on the way up to Petoskey, at one time counting 379 orange barrels in a row, but had time to stop for breakfast and get to the marching band show on time. 

It was our band director's last band camp with us, so it was emotional.  The show this year is three songs from the band 'Kansas.'  It was emotional to see my youngest march in the band as well.  My baby!  He has yet to master the whole point-your-toe toe thing while holding horn up high, but my baby was marching!  Weep.  The marching band is smaller this year than in all the years my daughter marched and is composed mostly of freshmen!  The new director will have a challenge ahead of him/her.

This is Taylor and my son in the room of the trombone section leader.  Those boys had covered their entire room in aluminum foil, which I'm sure was a hoot and quite hilarious, but I fail to see the point, being an old woman and not sure why anyone would waste perfectly good foil on such a thing, although if I were 16 again it would have made me pee myself laughing.  They were planning for their section's skit later that night, but then got busted by the chaperones because "a girl was in a boys room."   I feel bad for Taylor, being the only female boner this year in Marching Band!   She will be hard pressed to keep the boys in line this year!

D.K. gets a group hug from the band after the show

So, all in all it was a wonderful Saturday and a whirlwind 520 mile round trip with the unplanned sightseeing trip around Grand Rapids construction to see a bunch of kids and the fruit of their week long labor.   VIVA MUSIC! 

August 7, 2007 - I am on vacation this week.  It's nice.  I had planned on sleeping in every day, however so far that has not happened.  Saturday of course we were up way early to leave to go up North.  Sunday I got up out of instinct and because my bladder demanded I get up.  Monday I would have slept in, but had forgotten to turn the one alarm clock off that is programmed to go off at 5:30 on Monday - Friday.  This morning it was Odie's old bladder that got me up by six a.m. Sigh.  Of course I can take naps for thrills later in the day, so no big whoop. 

Yesterday my daughter and I went to lunch, then went to the chiropractor.  It was fun.  We had an almost 1 1/2 hour delay at the chiros, so we looked at all the magazines and made funny comments about some pictures and pointed out what we liked about other pictures.  We got 'cracked' and it felt so wonderful.  My jaw had been out of place since my 'stress' week and my bite had been off but I thought I had it 'fixed' by relaxing my face and the like, however it was not fixed.  Dr. popped it back in.  What a nice feeling.   When your jaw is out of line, it really bites.  (Or bites poorly as the case may be.)  I am still amazed how your body can treat you without your knowledge or consent. 

We also stopped at the Dollar Store and got some cool pool toys that were on clearance.  We came home and got in the pool and just played.  That was a hoot.  Last night my husband and youngest son got in the pool and just floated about.  Very relaxing. 

This morning it was raining and storming to beat the band.  We need rain so badly, so it was a welcome sound.   There was so much lightening and boom booms that the animals were all walking around in a crouched position.  It was freaking them out.  Above the rain noises you could hear the sucking sounds of a very dry landscape. 

August 10, 2007 - I have done absolutely NOTHING on this vacation and I love it.  The last two days I've slept in until 7:30!!  There are times a vacation doesn't mean you have to travel - sometimes it means you just have to NOT DO ANYTHING in particular. 

I called my best friend Vickie and talked to her - which is always nice and makes me feel peaceful and whole.  She was in bed this time and I was awake, a switch!  I wish we were closer (geographically) but we couldn't be closer (spiritually) and if we were closer (geographically) we'd cause mayhem and madness everywhere we went, so maybe it's better for now that we are separated by miles until we are both confined to our Rascals and unable to cover as much terrain.   Smile.

The family of Sandhill Cranes were laying down behind our cars this morning.  Just hanging out.  They have adopted us.  Even yesterday when my husband was working on moving the satellite dish to a pole in the front yard, they just moved over a bit, and stayed.  If they are out front when we come home, they barely even move anymore.  The 'daddy' just displays his wing span at the car and the kids may jump a bit, but they DON'T MOVE and make us feel bad for driving in and out of our own driveway.  Or is it really their driveway?

I did go see my Aunt and Uncle last night, and that was fun.  I love listening to them tell stories of their past.   Aunt Jean wanted a Swiffer WetJet mop thingy, so I stopped and got her one from the store and brought it over and put it together.  Of course, I had to test it!  I love that thing!  I must get one for myself.  I did her kitchen and bathroom.   Awesome!  I normally have an issue with Swiffer stuff - how you use it a short while then pitch it and replace it with more landfill bound material, especially when a washable old towel would work just as well - but I love the WetJet!  I am going to get myself one.  I even went on line to request a five dollar off coupon.   "Yes, darling great grandchild of mine, of course you live on top of a methane filled landfill composed mainly of old paper products and Swiffer mop heads, but Grandma had the cleanest floors in the early 2000s...oh my stars, how they shined..."

I had dinner with my girlfriends from High School on Wednesday night.  We met at Bud's in Schoolcraft and waited for almost 45 minutes before we realized they were not going to wait on us.  I think we would have stayed had they even brought us water, but they didn't.  So we walked across the road to Schnauzer's and were seated, served, and eating in less that 10 minutes!  I read somewhere once that food is better when shared with friends and laughter or something like that.  It's so true.  (Read that on the wall at an Arby's, I believe.  Arby's wise magic.)  I had shrimp with linguini noodles, and I pity all of my friends as they were in the line of fire of my feeding frenzy.  You would think I was using the fork for the first time that night.  I have gained 5 pounds this vacation week!  FIVE POUNDS!  Bad Sandy...BAD BAD!  As soon as I'm back to work I'll poop that out in no time, I know, but man - FIVE POUNDS? 

We saw the Simpson's movie on Wednesday, too.  Awesome.  Yes, I know - it's like paying to see something you can see for free on the T.V., but come on...it's the Simpsons!  Seeing them on the 'big screen' was well worth the money.  The kids in back of us at the theater were lacking proper chewing skills.  They could smack their lips louder than the movie, which was pretty loud.  Why we didn't move is beyond me.  When you sit next to people who chew louder than theater surround sound - it's time to move...really.  My favorite things from the movie were:  #1 - "Thank you, Boob Lady"  #2 - The scene where Homer is going down the sink hole and got stuck while he was 'flipping' off the town's people, which is no easy task when you only have four fingers to begin with   #3 - Marge's expletive (finally after all these years of being the long suffering level headed one who wouldn't say poop if her mouth was full of it) to Homer and Bart when they were trying to save the town.  Contented sigh.  Of course, 'Spider Pig' will be a classic forever yet 'Harry Plopper' is a classic in itself.

Today I have lunch with my sister and then I might just swing around and get myself a Swiffer WetJet and clean my floors this afternoon.  Hold me back - I'm living life on the edge, AGAIN! 

August 13, 2007 - This is what I did my whole vacation......that is, if I were a cat - I could say "this is all I did" and since you won't see me in a photo such as this any time soon, this was the best way to express what I did on my vacation, which was next to nothing, which was WONDERFUL. 

I did mow yesterday since the rain finally gave me something to mow.  I mowed the back half in a serpentine pattern just because I could.  It looks like I was intoxicated when I mowed, but who cares - it was fun, and the only people who see it are the planes in the flight pattern over our house and the horses out back.  The purple martin birdies were swooping down with sheer joy as I mowed to gobble up all the buggies that were being stirred up by the mower.   I love watching those guys fly.  They are like the Thunderbird team of the bird world. 

I helped my husband put up shed #4 in the "Walk of Sheds" out behind out house.  Apparently, one can never have too many plastic, wooden, or aluminum sheds.  I didn't know this.  I thought one or two sheds were enough.  Silly me.  Have you ever put up your own shed?  Well, DON'T.  Sigh.

Saturday afternoon was spent in the pool with a cranberry margarita.  I don't drink hardly anything anymore, since the great 'overdose' of 1998 or so when I broke my drinker in Arizona, so when I do have a sip of the something it hits me hard.  My two sons were amused by my intoxication.   The buzz lasted until I paid for the boys to go get us dinner, and then it was gone, but while it was there it was kind of fun.  After the margarita, my husband and I had a vodka and raspberry juice drink in the pool.  I have had that unopened bottle of Grey Goose vodka for 10 years.  It was, to say the least, smooooooth.  I bought it for the cool glass bottle way back when.  I like cool glass stuff.  I was in bed and sleeping by 9 p.m.  WOO HOOO - I'm a crazy woman.  Hahaha.   Hold me back.

So vacation is over.  It was nice.  I didn't do anything special, which made the whole vacation special in itself.   I liked it. 

This weekend is my daughter's turn to move in to her FIRST APARTMENT.  Sigh.  I am happy for her, because all kids want to 'break free' eventually from their nest, but I am worried as well.  (Paybacks are hell, ain't they, Ma?  Smile.)  I have to pick her up and go co-sign for her this Friday.  She has been buying furniture and groceries all summer, so she's pretty well stocked for her first outing.  She has worked all summer and saved her money.   I'm proud of my girlie.  I will miss her, as well.  :(

Well, off to work I go.  May the force be with us all.

August 19, 2007 - There was a voice mail for me Friday at work from my daughter. "Mommy!  Mommy!  Daddy got me my bed!  It's a nice firm bed!   Mommy!  Mommy!  I'm moving out!  Mommy!  I'm excited..."  This voice mail went on for a bit and was cute and silly.  It made me laugh.  

Friday night I left work and went home to pick up a caravan of cars that began the great migration I call  "one more down - one to go."  My daughter's car was loaded down as was my car, Dad's truck, and boyfriend's car.  Off we went.  I'm sure the image on the highway was reminiscent of the Beverly Hillbillies as they moved to California.  We met her room mate there at the rental office.  It took us an hour to get all the paperwork taken care of while the boys waited patiently at the apartment.  (No keys until paperwork is signed, so the boys waited and talked and beeped our phones to complain.) 

It's a nice apartment.  New carpet and paint - and lots of room for two girls.  Tons of closet space.  As my youngest son said, "The walk in closet by the front door is as big as my bedroom at home!"  We moved in all we had loaded into the vehicles and Dad put the bed together.  Amanda's Dad arrived with the couch and the young strapping males in the group hauled that up too.  (The apartment is on the third floor.)  Afterwards, Dad took the herd out to dinner and we ate and gabbed about her new digs.  Since we all drove separate vehicles, I chose the long way to come home so I could think and ponder the moving of my baby girl.  I listened to peaceful music and just let the wind whip my hair and I didn't cry.  I just drove and let the worry fly out the window with my loose hairs.

Yesterday was the final moving phase.  Big brother didn't have to work, so he took his sister and little bro up to shop for her new desk.  He bought it for her as a house warming present.  How sweet!  He even assembled it for her.  We loaded down the truck again and waited for the kids to call us and tell us it was 'time' to bring up the last load.  In the meantime, while we waited for the 'call' I cleaned the house here and Dad mowed.   Once the call came, we hauled up the last load and the kids the stuff upstairs, and then it was 'over' for us.  The deed was done.  Now it's up to daughter to arrange and settle in.  Sigh.

Dad took us out for dinner, AGAIN, and we went to CiCi's.  CiCi's is a pizza place where I'm sure each piece of pizza is has a "calories from fat" ratio of 100% and they have lots of it.  It's like a continuous trough of pizza for us piggies.  Plus they have brownies and the best cinnamon rolls.  (They have a salad bar as well, but come on - what is the point of THAT?)  Lordy, did we eat.  We ate and laughed and bloated as a family and it was nice until we got home and all that food hit bottom.  Sigh.  We were going to have a bonfire last night, but it rained, so my daughter made Some Mores on the stove and we ate those and decided that the dumbest thing we could have possibly done was to eat MORE.  As the fat expanded around my waist and jetted out into the world and poured over the side of my shorts, I passed out in the Easyboy listening to CourtTV.  I announced to everyone before I got up, gathered my fat, and actually moved to bed that we were only having clear broth for dinner on Sunday, as that is all our bodies would most likely tolerate.  So far this morning we are all sauntering around the house like we have hangovers. 

I am having issues with food again.  Sigh.  There, I said it on-line, admitting the fact to the three people who read this diary.  I am not being good.  I am eating too much.  Now, if you would all send me email lecturing me on this subject, I would appreciate it.   Seriously.  Someone tell me how far I've come and that I can continue.   Someone tell me to shut my mouth and go for a walk.  Someone walk up to me and slap my face and scream, "Snap out of it!"  Someone arrange an intervention between me and the fridge.  I can't go back - I just can't!  SOMEBODY STOP ME!   Oh, I have to stop myself you say?  Oh, great.  This isn't gonna be easy...

August 21, 2007 - THANK YOU!  I got some awesome inspirational letters/calls (lectures) yesterday and I appreciate them with all my heart.  Keep it up, my friends!  I appreciate your honesty and the fact you care enough to write/call and tell me to STOP IT, DAMNIT!  I did really well yesterday, and plan to continue to do well today.   One day at a time is the key, apparently. 

I talked to my BFF Vickie from Florida and I decided I could lose the Stella weight (enough weight to get Stella shoved back in to where she came from) by my birthday.  That would be cool.  My cousin reminds me I wanted to do cartwheels.  I still want to do a cartwheel again before I die.  My Aunt suggested I get back in to Weight Watchers immediately and start cooking healthy again and told me "YOU CAN DO IT, GIRL!" and you know what, I know I can!  WOOT.  Thank you guys!  ONE THING AT A TIME.  ONE DAY AT A TIME. 

Jane stopped by my office yesterday morning to hug me, which was sweet, because she is going through what I'm going through by 'losing' a daughter to the real world.  She is going through the empty nest syndrome totally - both of her girls are 'gone' and on their own now.  I, on the other hand, as my Aunt reminded me, still have two at home (one that came back after flying the coop and my youngest) so really, all is well when you come to think on it.   I will quit lamenting the fact my baby girl is gone and switch to encouraging her when we do talk and enjoying every second I get to be with her, just like I did when she WAS at home.  Sometimes growing up sucks.  Smile.

I forgot to mention that Saturday when we were at my daughter's apartment just hanging around after everything was moved up and in, that I started going through a few bags that her Grandma had given her of various items.  There were some really cool things for the kitchen in the one bag, and the next bag had doilies and such in it and other cloth items.  I cocked my head, looked up and said, "This is what you did to me for 19 years and I'd like to return the favor..." and started whipping those cloth items randomly around the living room.   Hahahaha.  There is a small evil joy in trashing your kids place instead of the normal visa versa.

August 26, 2007 - Sunday morning and all is sunshiny and blue skied...finally.  We have power, but many still do not from the storms this week.  We ran on the generator for a 20 hours from Thursday night until Friday afternoon or so - but other than that we came out OK this time.  The neighbors to our south lost a huge tree (uprooted completely) and all around the general area there were trees down and of course, power is gone.   Stores are losing their refrigerated items and freezer items...sigh.  Mother Nature is one heck of force to reckon with sometimes.

I have work to do today - to get ready for some training classes I have next week at work.  It's almost sad, really:   We got an hour overview of our new phones Friday afternoon and now we are to go and 'teach' the general public how to use them.  Without being able to play with them ourselves and touch them and learn them, the classes will be more of a gathering of people to show them the new models vs. actually teaching them anything.  We can't even do the voice mail training until they are 'live' as it doesn't work now to 'play' with.   For some reason, as much as this irritates other people on my team (the inability to really 'teach' well due to the circumstances) it doesn't irk me half as much, or so I'd like to pretend.  This type of change doesn't bother me - This is someone else's project, not mine.  I will do my best, of course, to try to allay fears from the general public of the change - but in reality, I can't fret over this too much.  Oh sure, it depresses me, because I want to be able to show a complete picture and I can't...Oh sure, I was almost in a coma yesterday from the stress of thinking about it too much...but all in all, I can only do my best with what I have.  This type of change is not the worst type of change... blah blah blah...

However, I will get on my audible soapbox over the change at my local grocery market, for example.  They were bought out by another super market chain that has been slowly sucking up competition in the area.   Corporations gone wild.  That kind of change bothers me to no end.  I can harp on that like a songbird on meth, boy howdy.  I proclaim often I will never go there EVER AGAIN, and every time I say that, I do go there again as I need something fast that can't wait for a drive to a bigger city store...but then I come out with my product and complain and swear I'll never go there EVER AGAIN...sigh. 

I wonder why that sort of change bothers me and inspires me to be more vocal than another type of change?  Change is change...I wonder why my brain makes the distinction between some changes.  When it comes to change - normally we can't control it too much and we have to roll with them...

Oy!  It just dawned on me, my brain doesn't make the distinction - I am picking and choosing which changes I will deal with and how I will deal with them!  I can be mad at the grocery store all I want, but is it really the corporation I'm mad at or the fact I can be vocal about it and not about other types of change so I take it out on the higher prices and the lack of bag boys?  Ahhh....self therapy rocks.

I guess it just boils down to the fact humans don't deal with change as well as they deal with, let's say, a horrible storm.   We can't control storms and we know this so we accept this.  On the other hand, we are under the illusion we can control our lives and sometimes things happen that we can't control and we just go nuts.

Humans - go figure!  Whadya gonna do?

August 28, 2007 - First of all, I want to send out KUDOS to teachers EVERYWHERE.  How you chose your profession is beyond me but I thank you because I would fail miserably at teaching.  Don't all of your afternoon classes go NUTS?  Isn't it hard to control a herd of kids by afternoon??  HOW DO YOU DO IT??  Hats off to teachers and if you see one, thank them profusely.

Second of all, I want to warn you girls out there who have hair trigger bladders as I do that the only time you are going to see any of your former male classmates (that you normally would never see) from High School who want to ask questions about the 30th reunion is approximately 67.9 seconds after you place one of those neon pink megacontainers of Poise pads in your cart. 

August 29, 2007 - Wadsworth, the gold fish who survived the great fish genocide of 2004 (check out the November 14th, 2004 posting in 'Archives') is on the bottom of his 16 gallon tank - nearly dead.  He started swimming sideways as if drunk this morning (or I should say I just noticed it this morning!)  He lived a good life, he did.   He has been pampered like Elvis over the last three years.  I unplugged the filter and bubbles so he didn't get banged around the tank like a penny in a dryer by the water current. I took out Matthew and Roderick (also goldfish, but much smaller) and put them in the smaller fish tank because they were eating Wadsworth's tail and ramming him from behind.  Fish are not sympathetic creatures when it comes time for hospice services for their tank mates.  Sigh.  I will miss Wadsworth.  I mean, I liked him as much as a person could like a fish contained in a water filled glass container.  He got to be at 5 inches long and was huge.  I fear the toilet will plug up when we flush him tomorrow. 

I hope I'm lucky enough when my times comes to have someone unplug the bubbler so I don't bang my head on the plastic castles ... really, now - that isn't too much to ask, now is it?

Speaking of dying stuff - they found a baby mouse at work crawling blindly along the cement.  Of course they call me.  Once you are known to have rescued a baby creature of nature as I did with Burt the Bird,  you are branded for life - although, once you see a baby creature of nature abandoned, you cannot just walk away, at least I can't anymore!   I have plotted my husbands death a million times over the years, but I couldn't let a baby mouse lay on the sidewalk!  Go figure!  There had been a big old dead mouse type thing on the sidewalk on Monday morning.  I am assuming that was 'Mom' and the baby was found on Tuesday. 

I thought about taking the baby mouse to the woods nearby and letting him die in the warm grass.  I thought about taking him home as a 'starter' mouse for Stewie since Stewie just can't get the killing thing down that should come naturally for a cat.  I finally took him into my office and wrapped him up in towels and left him on my desk.  I figured he could at least die in a swaddled state.  Kathey brought me a small syringe they use for assembly to try to feed him with.  I had no intentions of trying to feed him, but once I had the syringe, I gave the little bugger some water.  I looked on line quickly for the care and feeding of baby mice - and just shook my head in amazement!  If you don't catch them within the first 8 hours after they lose their Mom, apparently you can write them off.  PLUS - after checking out a few sites, it wasn't a baby mouse I had, it was a baby RAT.  PLUS PLUS - they don't potty on their own that young (his eyes were not even open yet) so the Mom has to lick their hindquarters to get the to do their business, and I had no great desire to stimulate a rat's ass!  Sigh.  They only eat when they are warm...the list goes on. 

Oh my.  I think humans have a better row to hoe when it comes to raising their young than a Mom rat does!  I left him swaddled on my desk in a box in a bucket and left for home.  This morning when I came in I just assumed he would have expired by now but the little booger was STILL moving and crawling!  Cripes!  I decided to go get him some milk and heat it up and try to feed him.  He seemed to like it, once I figured out exactly how to get it in him, which was no easy task.  (Had to poke the end through the towels like a teat and he tried to suckle, but it was hard to do seeing as it wasn't a teat, it was a syringe...plus I had shot a load up his poor nose at one point trying to find his mouth!  He ended up blowing milk bubbles.)

He ate some and passed out.   When I checked him again a few hours later, he had pooped all over.  (With no butt licking on my part required) which automatically indicated to me that the milk was doing him more harm than good.  When I left tonight he was very weak and on his side and curled up and not moving.  Sigh.  It probably would have been more humane of me to give him to Stewie.  I killed him with cows milk and good intentions instead...

I guess I should warn my kids, huh?  "When you kids have children, maybe Grandma shouldn't baby-sit?" Smile. 

September 4, 2007 - Ah, it's early in the morning, and soon I will be screaming up the stairs to my new freshman - "GET UP, IT'S TIME FOR SCHOOL!"   I know he's kind of freaked out - his first day of HIGH SCHOOL and all!  I feel for him.  I like the way they do it at our school now - they have the freshmen come in alone the first morning - give them a grand tour - then the rest of the kids come in half way through.  Makes an extra bus run for the district, but I think all in all it sure eases a freshman's mind.

My son's first official half time show was awesome last Thursday.  After listening to the band practice last Tuesday night, thinking to myself the whole time, "Well, Sandy - remember, the majority are freshmen and they are new at this and..." they came through in flying colors at the real show.  They really pulled it together!  I thought after two kids in band that I would not be so emotional by the site of my youngest in uniform, but NO!  I bawled like a baby.  (Even though the whole time the kid I thought was my son really wasn't him - they all look the same in uniform ... sigh ... it did make me question my ability as a Mom if I can't even pick out my kid from the herd!  I am no penguin, that's for sure.)  After half time I went to sit by the band in the bleachers, and it was so cool to feel the music vibrate through the seats.  As an old woman who loses her balance stepping over an ant hill, I do so appreciate the new bleachers with the 'old woman' hand rails and the solid foot rest area that doesn't allow purses or small children to fall through!  Praise be to millages!

My daughter's first day being a sophomore in college is today as well.  Last week she had band camp and her back aches from all that work.  May the force be with both my school kids.  One day at a time, kiddos - one day at a time!

I did nothing exciting on this Labor Day weekend and as little 'labor' as possible.  Sunday was spent watching Court TV and crime stuff on T.V. and took several naps (until I started having nightmares during the day and dream 'repeats' - a sure sign that one has slept way too much) and yesterday I cleaned and mopped and cleaned more and did laundry and swept out my car and cleaned out the pool.  I made up for my lazy Sunday and then some!  

I 'flushed' Wadsworth as he finally passed on.  He was HUGE!  We were all wondering if one flush would do it.  I had moved him to a 'sick' tank and he lived another few days.  He was a good fish.  (Or let me rephrase that - there are no 'good' fish - just captive creatures in a tank that can be entertaining for humans or not as the case may be, and Wadsworth was very entertaining and a survivor right up until he wasn't.)

September 7, 2007 - Since we decided to get windows for this tiny old place, I have not cleaned my current set of windows.   "Why bother?" I thought to myself.  "They are ripping them out soon anyway..."  So, for a month or more I have not cleaned my windows, assuming any day the new ones would be installed.  Right now the front window is pretty gross.   That is the window where the dogs hang over the couch like the girls in the opening of Petticoat Junction and bark at the squirrels who have the audacity to come within their range of vision.  There is dog snot nose marks everywhere.  That is also the window Stewie the Amazing Weezing Cat sneezes on when he's monitoring the Sand Hill crane activity and planning his escape.  You can only imagine what that poor window looks like.  It's driving me nuts.

I think my brother-in-law will start on the windows next week.  I dread the mess that will need to be cleaned up on the inside and outside once the process starts, but a year from now when I'm unlatching the windows and tilting them in to clean both outside and inside, I'll have forgotten all about my complaints at this moment.  I will assume that getting new windows is like having a baby...you forget the pain.  (Well, OK, that is a LIE when it comes to "forgetting the pain of childbirth."  Any woman will remind anyone who cares to listen and even those who don't about the pain which gets exponentially worse every time she tells the story for years to come.) 

My youngest son announced on Wednesday night "So, second day of being a freshman,um, and yeah -High School rocks basically..."  Wow.  I hope he's saying that during exam time!   He has had homework every night so far.  He has done it without complaining.   I think he's ill.  Smile.  He likes his new band director and he likes his classes and he's amazed at how time flies by.  Like I say - this is only a few days in.  I can't wait to get the skinny on my daughter's college courses when I see her this weekend.  I have baited her with the fact I froze her a batch of lasagna that we had for dinner.  I know she'll come over to do laundry and get her lasagna!   Next week she turns 20 already.  Seriously - time just flew by.  When I started this on line stuff, she was just a sixth grader.  Sigh. 

It's Friday, and since the company has NOT taken my suggestion for "NO BRA FRIDAY" I will go grab my blue jeans ready for the normal 'casual' Friday and get ready for work.   Sigh. Happy Weekend to you all.

September 9, 2007 - The weather channel says our mosquito level here where I live is at a 'moderate' level.  Hmmm, "moderate" I thought was just that, moderate - meaning that you have to occasionally swat at a skeeter that's sucking your blood, but didn't have to worry about skeeters flying off with your young children and small pets like so many flying monkeys from 'Wizard of Oz.' However, we do have to worry about that as the level of mosquitoes is terrible and far from moderate!  The recent wet weather has sent them into a reproduction cycle to rival no other known to any creature on earth.  You walk outside and breath them in.  Normally no decent mosquito in their right mind would even consider my blood type edible, but they are desperate enough as of late to find me an acceptable meal.  I might have used bug spray three times in the last 46 years...and those three times have been in the last three weeks!  Oy. It makes the bats happy at night, and I am so happy the little boogers are out in force sucking up all the skeeters they can eat. 

September 12, 2007 - It is 46 degrees this morning!  Take that you mosquitoes!  Bwahahahaha.

Monday night it just poured rain here, and the High School marching band marched in it during practice.   The kids seemed to have a hoot doing so, but they were soaked.  This morning my youngest asked me to check the weather for Friday (when the next home football game is) and they predict rain, to which he said, "Sweet!"  We have artificial turf now at our hometown stadium, so I assume marching on a wet field is easier now with less instances off accidental splits during hard moves.  He seemed thrilled it might rain during the show.  Sigh.  Kids!  Oy!  I, personally, don't want it to rain.

The whole herd of us are due to go to that game as it is my daughter's 20th birthday day as well as the day before her Dad's birthday.  After the game we will have CAKE AND ICE CREAM.   Cake and Ice Cream at 11 at night will be a Weight Watcher's worse scenario, but oh well.  I will have to walk a little further on Saturday, yes?  I am making one of the cakes, so I know I will eat some.  I am sending it home with my daughter (her cake) so it won't stay around to taunt me.  Cakes can talk, you know.   Especially yellow cakes with chocolate butter cream frosting.  They say, "Sandy - EAT ME!" and whisper sweet nothings into my ear until in a psychopathic fit to silence the voices, I eat the cake.  Best for all if the cake goes home with my daughter.

September 17, 2007 - I was admiring the stars this morning from out in the dog pen.  It is so 'human' of me to automatically find a pattern in the mass of stars over head.  I don't know constellation names, however.   I know many are named after Greek god and goddesses.  I know this because I read my son's summer reading project - a book about Greek mythology.  The mythological people from that time period were bratty whiners.  Geez.  That was one dysfunctional family.  If that were my family I'd move to the other side of the globe and forget to forward my address.  If the mythological gods and goddesses were such drama kings and queens, we can only imagine what the mere mortals were like during that time.  (Probably just like the mere mortals of our current era...sad sigh)

Birthday weekend was nice and the cake(s) were delicious.  Our football team lost miserably but the football game night in general was fun - to have the whole family together - freezing in the bleachers as a herd.  I had been feeling 'sick' for several days, and Saturday I felt almost 'fluish' but knew it wasn't the flu.  Oldest son has a sinus infection and youngest son was coughing and hacking a while back, so I assume I have what they have/had and Saturday it just 'hit' full throttle.  Sunday was spent having fevers on and off.

There are horses loose in our back yard this morning.  My son pointed it out as he just left for the bus.   They are running around all cocky as if to say, "Look, I'm loose!  Look! Clop Clop Clop, I tell you!"  A donkey is out with three horses and they horses are picking on the poor fellow.  I hope they get put back soon.  Don't make me sit out there yelling, "You horses get off my lawn!"

September 18, 2007 - The horses were found and put back by noon, but not before fearless Sadie, our neighbor's dog, herded them back to the field.  (Sadie will herd huge horses, but runs and cringes when Muffy the cat comes out.  Apparently the horses have never attacked poor Sadie as Muffy has.  Muffy lies in wait for that poor dog and literally flies on to her back and beats her with his paws!  Out of all the dogs I've had, Muffy the Cat is the best watch dog out of all of them, but I digress...) The people who own the horses also own "Five-o-Clock Charlie" (my nickname for him) who is a German short hair that periodically makes his rounds around the block when he breaks free of the invisible fence they have put up for him.  They also own the sheep that come to visit from time to time.  Having a farm is hard, especially when all the inmates keep making a break for it. 

Once again I was admiring the sky from the dog pen this morning, and saw a 'falling star' - awesome.   I said a little prayer thanking God for the protective layer of atmosphere that surrounds the earth allowing the brilliant sky show but burning the little boogers up in the process.  Falling stars would not be so cool if you also had to deal with impact afterwards.  I know - I've seen the movies...

I had fever on and off all day yesterday.  I took the day off of work and slept a lot.  This morning I don't feel so terrible, but tired.  I can deal with tired.  I am just tired watching my 14 year old change his clothes six times.  I thought that was just a 'female' thing - but apparently all genders at that age do that sort of thing.  At least he hung the clothes up that he decided not to wear!  A first!  Being young is as hard as being a farmer when things keep breaking out and running off without your permission.

September 19, 2007 - I was listening to BBC news on NPR and there was lady talking about soap and water in terms of washing your hands.   Long story short, it boils down to the fact if they could get poorer "third" world type countries to wash their hands as habit after pooping and after changing diapers and before eating and the like, that a million lives would be saved every year instead of dying as they do now from viruses and bacterial diseases, etc.   My first thought was awe - a million lives could be saved every year by just practicing basic hygiene!  My second thought was - "Where in the world would we put all those 'extra' people?"

I wasn't proud that I thought that.  I mean, come on!  They are offering a very simple way to save lives and I immediately think, "Where are we going to put all those people and what are we going to feed all those people??"  I was shocked at myself, but nonetheless, I thought it.  I came home and told my husband what I had thought. "Nice!  Boy, aren't you a kind person!" he teased.  Sigh.

The dogs woke me up at 2:45 a.m. this morning.  They were very upset and barking and prancing around the bed in a way I've never seen before.  In my 'just awake' daze, I thought maybe someone was out in the living room by the way they were acting.  I bravely rolled out of bed, Jake took my flank and Kia the lead, and walked out into the living room to investigate.   The dogs burst past me and ran to the back door immediately like the good little SWAT team that they are with their hair on their back shooting straight up and their growls low and intense.  I let them out and they practically pushed me over by pushing past me, barking and growling.  (I had seen a brown rump out of the corner of my eye in the kitchen window on the way to the back door, so I knew they were going nuts over deer.)  "Just a deer, you binglederrys!" I slurred, and please remember I was still just shocked to reality from a deep dream by dogs jumping all over me in a bed.  My brain does not open for business until 5:30 a.m. so my mouth was on it's own when attempting to speak. 

I sauntered out with them into the dog pen, half awake.  They were going NUTS and I swear their hair was so puffed up that it would all fall out at any moment.  It was then I saw that it wasn't deer, it was my horse friends from Monday with their donkey friend in tow!   They were just outside the dog fence.  Three of the huge horses (huge when they are that close to you at 3 a.m.) and the smaller donkey.  I deemed them "Loe, Marry, Curly, and Groucho" (that's how it came out since as I established before, my brain was not awake and my mouth was doing it's best on it's own.)  They ran back and forth as if to tease the dogs, then went and ate flowers out front and knocked over my bird bath.  A dazed old woman waving her arms with two caged dogs in a frenzy does not intimidate horses on the lam, which is good to know if you are ever in such a situation.  Muffy the Cat, however, was on night bivouac maneuvers when he saw the horses and was RIGHT THERE in attack mode, ready to take those things on!   Amazing.  (Muffy obviously got hit by a car one too many times.)  The horses did respond to Muffy.

I heard them gallop down the drive way away from my Killer Cat and 'clop clop' across the road.  The dogs calmed down after a while and when Muffy 'stood down' too, so I herded them back in the house and crawled back in bed.  I spent approximately 36 seconds worrying about the horses being hit by a car and fell asleep again.  Kia laid next to my head as if to protect me on the side near the door, and Jake sprawled out over my feet.  Good dogs.   Damned big dogs but good dogs.  I think I will stop to get the farmer's name and phone number this morning on the way to work, just in case.  I am sure they would want to know they have horses with a James Dean attitude.

This morning when walking out with my son to the bus (my excuse to go out and check on the rebel horses) I see they were at the neighbors eating from their garden.  Sigh.  I tried my "old woman waving arms and yelling" bit again, but they looked at me like, "Right, Lady!  Hahaha, Good try!"  I gave up and came in the house.   I did notice that now the other three horses and donkey are now free as well.   They stayed in the pen on Monday - good inmates that they were, but this time they decided it was time.  They are running with sheer joy and abandon in circles around the back yards and field.  I guess if I were a horse and broke free, I'd just run too.  I hope they stay out of the road.  I see there are piles of 'brown' all over my yard - I wonder if it's moles or horse poop?  (It was horse poop!)

September 25, 2007 - I have been in an angry pissed off mood for two days.  Not where I take it out on other people, but stewing mentally.  I get angry when I hear the news reports on the radio.  I get angry when people are stupid.  I get angry when I hear how huge our National debt is.   It's fricken HUGE.  I get very mad when I think government can't do a budget and they threaten to shut down.  I get furious when I hear of people walking off the job and striking when so many people are out of work to begin with...sigh.  I am angry.  I am sure it's a "cycle" thing - I can only think that is the only possible reason.  I am upset with my family for taking me for granted.  I am upset with myself for allowing them to take me for granted.  I am just not a happy camper and it's pissing me off. Is this all just going to get worse as menopause approaches?  I wonder.  I don't want to turn 'mean' - mean is not my first nature.  I have to be pretty upset normally to get mean - but if one is in a pissy mood all the time that just leads to MEAN.  Sigh.  It's like drugs - 'pissy' is a gateway emotion.  Next thing you know I'll be popping little kids balloons just to see them cry and not opening doors for people and cutting in line at the "10 items of less" line and eating grapes without paying for them in the produce section and farting without excusing myself just to get a reaction from people....HELP ME, OBE WAN!

We have all the windows installed now, and three of them are dressed out or trimmed or whatever you call it. They look awesome.  I spent Sunday cleaning them because now I can fold them in and clean them.  I thought that was a neat trick and know that now there is no excuse for dirty windows.  I am not mad at the windows. That's a good thing.

September 28, 2007 - I have a vendetta against a certain species of bird. I am not sure what kind of bird it is, however. This all started last week when I thought my neighbor's car alarm was going off at five a.m.  It turned out it wasn't a car alarm, it was a BIRD.  A very loud annoying BIRD.   This bird made a consistent 'tweep tweep tweep tweep' call for over an hour. Oh sure, he'd mix it up with a few pauses now and then or he'd throw in a few tempo changes such as 'tweep tweeeeeeep tweeppee TWEEP tweep tweep' but he didn't stop and it droned on and and on and on...

This was over after a few days at my house - the 'tweeper' finally flew away or his battery ran out and I can't say I miss him, because I don't. Yesterday at work, however, while a bunch of people were on break at the picnic tables, just sitting there talking and laughing all innocent like, a 'tweeper' started 'tweeping' right above my head. I made the group hush - "Do you HEAR THAT?" I exclaimed.  "Is it a car alarm?" someone asked.   "It's a bird..." I drawled in my most disgusted voice,"an evil bird!"  I got up to investigate.  "I have to know what kind of bird it is!" I told the group.  As soon as I started walking further into the yard, the bird shut his tweeper.  When I sat down again, he started tweeping!   After a while of doing this up and down routine of 'tweep or no tweep' people were laughing.  I had witnesses.  This bird was messing with my head.  No one could see the bird in question, they just knew if I moved the bird shut up.  (Other people could come and go and the bird kept tweeping, only when I moved did he silence himself!)  Sigh.  I find it funny in a very aggravating way, almost like a tooth ache - it hurts to push it, but it feels good, too.  I am being stalked by The Tweeper.

I am not so mad anymore.  I have been so busy at work, and I have used that phantom anger to work harder.  It helps to direct bad emotions at practical things, like washing walls or kicking butt and taking names at work.  I pumped out an 'emergency' project in two days by channeling all my loose pent-up emotions into it.  (A company in Canada should be thanking the Tweeper and lack of Pamprin for that!)  

My oldest son turned 27 years old yesterday.  Sigh.  I can't believe he's that old already, seeing as I just gave birth to him not that long ago...right?  It just seems like yesterday. We will have my oldest son's celebration Sunday when we can all be together.  He wanted BLTs for supper.  How cool is that?  Nothing fancy, just BLTs. He did request 'real' mayonnaise, however.  I believe his exact statement was, "Mom, you can use fake bacon and fake bread, but can we please have real mayo?" 

My youngest son has my keyboard filled with many pieces of food articles, bless his little soul.  I just got a half bag of corn chips out of the thing.  My 'N' key was sticking with a vengeance.   He has the homecoming game to perform at tonight, and then on Saturday the high school band goes to an invitational.  My daughter's college band performs there as a "special guest" to end the show, so it will be cool to see both kids march in one evening of music. Happy sigh.

October 3, 2007 - This is a before shot of the back of my little house...

This is an in-progress shot of the back of my little house NOW...

Wow - amazing what some plastic can do to the overall appearance of a building!  Just amazing. 

My son had left for the bus this morning, then came back in carrying his back pack as if it was a bomb.   "Mom, can you take me to school?" he asked in a very irritated voice, "...Muffy just peed on my backpack!"  Sure enough, Muffy, defender of the homestead - cat caretaker to the Stars - had taken it upon himself to mark my son's backpack as his very own.  I laughed out loud as I couldn't help myself.  "I stood there petting him like every morning, and he just walked over and peed all over it!" my son said to me as he shook his head in a very parental way. (Parental Way = Confused Controlled expression.) I grabbed the Lysol and a towel and cleaned up his backpack best I could in the limited time we had.  I had no urge to drive him to school as I was still in my jammies.  He made it back out to the bus stop in time to catch the bus, but he was muttering to himself all the way down the drive.   "Stupid cat...pet him and love him and he pisses on my stuff...grumpy sounds....more grumpy sounds...."  Smile.

The marching band got first place in their first invitational on Saturday!  HURRAY!  Then we got to see WMU Bronco band with my daughter included march after that!  What a night for music!  When we finally saw my daughter in out amongst the 200+ kids on the field, we let her know we saw her.  (She was no doubt proud to have her parents waving and hollering at her from the stands.)  We even yelled at her friend David, but I don't think he heard, or he tried very hard not to look if he did.  What a fun fun night. We took the kids to dinner afterwards, and I was proud to be seen with my 'boners' in their band uniform pants that come up to their chins and look similar to the style of pants a firefighter would wear.  Contented sigh. Thank you, God, for music!

October 7, 2007 - Yesterday was fun!  I got to see my friend 'Thelma' (or Reva, if you want to get technical, geez...) over in St. Joseph (which is about an hour away from me.)  She was up from Texas for a family reunion.  I have not seen her for at least 8 years.  It was so grand to see her.   St. Joseph was having their Harvest Festival.  It wasn't much of a festival - but still, it was quaint and anything on the shores of Lake Michigan is great.  The amazing part was the amount of highway construction that was taking place between where I live and St. Joseph!  Man!  You know you are in trouble when one of the first signs you see after getting on the highway is "CONSTRUCTION FOR THE NEXT 21 MILES - BE PREPARED TO STOP."

Reva brought me my Birthday present - a huge selection of homemade cards that she had made.  I love those things.  This batch had so many awesome colors and styles.  I can't wait to start using them! 

October 8, 2007 - I forgot to mention that Saturday while we were walking about downtown St. Joseph, enjoying the local sites and sweating rivers from the heat, Reva said it felt like she was in Texas with temperature being so high and she guestimated it must be around 85 degrees.  I told her this was Michigan in October, there was no way it could be THAT warm PLUS we were right on the shores of Lake Michigan...

I must retract my statement - it was 89 degrees that day!  (As I merged back on to the highway I heard a local radio station mention how warm it was.  YIKES!)  I am gonna be 47 tomorrow - and it shocked me!  "I can't believe it's 89 degrees in Michigan in October!" I said out loud to myself.  Then again, a lot of things have shocked me lately.  Things you thought you knew but then find out you knew nothing at all.   You never stop learning and every day there is more to learn or ponder.   Example - last night at 2:45 a.m., Kia the female dog was crying and pawing me.   I assumed (after waking up a bit) she had to potty or I was laying on her and she was being smothered to death.  I rolled out of bed and did my duty as a good Mom to let her out so I didn't have to clean up any accidents in the morning.  Jake came out with us, although he was just going because we were going outside and didn't want to be left out of the party.  I wobbled back and forth with my head thrown back watching the stars while the dogs did their emergency night business. 

Suddenly, there was a sound to the South East that froze all three of us. The dogs neck and back hair shot up, but they didn't bark.  My first thought was some neighbors down the road a bit were having a fine time (wink wink, nudge nudge) as initially the noise sounded like the call of a woman in the throws of passion.  After a bit while the cries went on and repeated in a rhythmic fashion, it would turn into a throaty rumble (not unlike the sound a bunch of drunk bullfrogs who got a hold of a megaphone...)  The dogs still stood frozen and I did too.  The calling was not too close so I wasn't worried some Dean Koontz type creature would swoop down upon us in the dog pen, but I have never heard ANY night calls like that in my life from ANY type of creature I know to live in Michigan.  The closest thing I can compare it to that I'm aware of was a peacock call, except a higher more piercing 'scream' and the rumbling afterwards was a nice touch.   I am pretty sure it had to be some form of bird, but at 2:45 a.m.???  Don't birds sleep?  I know of no one around here that has peacocks in their back yard...(although now while I'm typing I do remember an older couple to our north by about a mile that used to have peacocks years ago...hmmmmm.)

As the dogs and I had our heads cocked listening to this 'thing' it got further and further away.  I realized I had spent a good 15 minutes with the dogs listening to 'it.'  I decided it was time to go back to bed.  I am very curious to know what type of creature that might have been.  Like I said, you hear/learn/see new stuff every day.  It just never stops.  

October 12, 2007 - I had a lovely birthday day on Tuesday.  I didn't expect much as the family can't celebrate until this Sunday when we are all together as herd, so all the little surprises were very nice.  My husband came home from work as I was leaving for work on Tuesday, and he got his jammies on and was eating a bowl of cereal as I was leaving, and never said "Happy Birthday" or anything, so as I walked out the door I asked him in the meekest voice I could muster, "Aren't you even going to say 'Happy Birthday' damnit..."  He flew out of his chair and apologized and said he had thought about it all night as work when he was writing the date, and he was sorry and he was just tired and ...

Later that morning at work, I got a lovely flower arrangement in a cool pumpkin planter with a bunch of balloons and the card said, "Happy Birthday, Damnit!" Hahahaha.  It made me laugh.   My sister stopped by and brought me a lovely card and pumpkin candle holder and a cool yellow heart suncatcher (which is now in one of my new windows here at home where I can enjoy it.)  Later in the day Jean made me come with her (I assumed for a help with her computer) but instead led me to the classroom where they had a beautiful fall colored cake for me and a card that played "Age of Aquarius" and the the whole group sang to me!  Awesome.  I cried.  People do such nice things and it amazes me.  I am a very lucky woman.  Later my coworker Mike said, "Man, you get a cake and people sing to you when it's only your lame 47th birthday, not a cool birthday like your 50th or anything!"  I told him people were very good to me.   He said I was just "too nice" and that getting an impromptu party on my 47th birthday birthday only meant "I just don't tell people to f'off enough!"   That made me laugh.

I got dinner served to me when I got home that night as well and my youngest son had drawn a cool picture for me and saved it as the desktop picture on the computer, and my daughter and oldest son had sent me cool greetings and notes.  I also receive lovely emails from from BFF Vickie in Florida, Lisa in Ohio, Reva in Texas, Helen in Arizona, Terri in Texas, Terri in Indiana, Julie in Michigan, and from Aunt Trudy, Aunt Jean, niece Tori, and brother Glen!   So, for "not" celebrating my birthday on my actual day of birth, I got treated like a queen.  I can't wait for Sunday!   Smile.

October 14, 2007 - Ah, a Sunday morning where everyone is still in bed and it's just me and the dogs and that DAMNED SQUEAKY TOY...a wonderful morning.

The crows are gathering across the road in the corn field they just harvested.  There are hundreds of them!   Noisy!  It's fun to watch them all lift off together and land together.   Reminds me of a large school of fish.  The sandhill cranes are also off in the distance, flying randomly in groups of twenty or so, getting ready eventually to fly down south.  (I say eventually as they always seem so confused as to where 'South' really is.)  The cranes are very noisy as well, and if you were not familiar with all the various calls and squawks, you would think you were in some horror movie. 

Yesterday my oldest son brought home my Birthday cake.  This was no cake - this was half of the world's food supply in a box!  He ordered the large sheet cake, not knowing the large sheet cakes feeds a small third world country.  It's HUGE.  My daughter will be taking cake home tonight, as well as half the tri state area.  It's a beautiful cake, mind you - with my name on it and everything, plus yellow roses!  Below is a shot of it, or at least what I could get into the frame - there is still a huge chunk not showing!   (And I have NO idea who ate a piece up near the top...really.  No clue - belch - whatsoever!)

October 18, 2007 - I took the balance of the cake to work on Monday to 'share' and left it in the break room.  Later, I overheard someone saying, "Who is this 'San' person, anyway?"  That made me happy because that meant the cake had been consumed up to where the "dy" was missing from my name!  Smile.  I believe the cake is finally all gone.  I thank my son for being so generous and I am glad we got to share some sugar and the joy of crapping out frosting with many other people. 

Monday was a bad day at work.  There had been a major malfunction at the data center where we keep several of our servers and mainframe.  The data center had a UPS explode (backup battery supply) and that in turn took down the main power (which is what is NOT supposed to happen at a data center - I mean, it's one of the main reasons you go to a data center in the first place, so your servers and stuff never 'go down' and take a pooh from lack of juice...)   However, it was not mentioned to any customers of said data center that the servers went down and therefore, with all the machines taking an abnormal shutdown, it was chaos on Monday.  Oy.  Had I known we had a massive power failure up there, I could have done some stuff to fix some stuff - but this was something I figured out after the fact. This weekend will be spent running some reclaiming of disc jobs to get stuff back up to par.  I was so stressed on Monday that I must have clenched my rear end all day!!   When I got home, I was walking like a cowboy that had ridden all day and night on top of a cactus to bring the herd to market over rough terrain.  I was not aware I had my buns in such a spastic seized-up condition until I was home and tearing up from the 'roids. 

The mind is an awesome thing, but it must be very very bored up there, knocking about the skull with little to do but monitor the 'stupid' that eeks out of our mouths on a daily basis and making sure all the normal functions work, like breathing and such.  I used to have panic attacks for years.  Once I got those under control and smoothed stuff out with my brain so it would not throw me into panics for no good reason at odd times and choke me to death, I just assumed that would be the end of it.  However, my brain decided that it would attack my face when I got stressed and distracted.  I would put my own jaw out of place from clenching my jaw so tight when I got stressed.  I have since taken my brain to court and ironed out that issue pretty much, so NOW what does my brain do?   It sets up the lower half of my body to tighten up when stressed!  I have to laugh. Ha Ha!  I am getting better at second guessing my brain as to where it will strike next.  I suppose by next year when I panic a bit, my shoes will shoot off and my toes will sign for help while I'm hula dancing uncontrollably. 

It was very neat Monday night... I figured out I was clenching the lower forty and stopped doing it and soaked in a hot tub to fix it, and then went and waited in the High School parking lot for my son's band practice to finish.  Normally I go up and sit and listen to the kids and yap with the other parents, but I was just too pooped to move.  I decided to two-way my daughter while I sat in the car, and it was just neat that we could talk for a half hour as 'friends' and discuss life and laugh.  As tired as I was, that was quite nice.   I have neat kids.

Tuesday morning was my annual poke and prod visit.  I don't mind going in for those.  I enjoy talking to my doctor so it's over with quickly and it's not big whoop.  I was going to cancel it and lie and say I had my monthly so I didn't have to go in and see her with the couple of pounds I gained from mass consumption of cake.  (I figured she would give me a stern lecture and remind me about Stella just waiting to be shoved back in her cubby hole, etc.)  However, she didn't lecture me and she said it's good from time to time to stray from the path in order to get back on it.  I felt so relieved!  I can't believe how worried I was.  (I think I was more worried that I was going to weigh in 4000 pounds heavier that last visit, but I was not and I was thrilled.)  I did NOT lose the 20 pounds I promised my BFF Vickie because I'm still crapping out frosting and probably will be for months to come.  I will get back on track - 'tis a fact.  I could never go 'back' to feeling like I did over a year ago.  Ick.  Amazing what humans will do themselves for the sake of gluttony. 

I think out of all the seven deadly sins, gluttony is definitely in the top ten. 

October 19, 2007 - I sit here waiting for the electrician to come to fix the power meter box and wires so the siding can go up tomorrow on that side of the house.  I took a shower early and got dressed so the poor boy wouldn't be shocked by the vision of me in my whole "T-Shirt/Underwear" pajama ensemble.  You have to work up to that short of visual shock, I think.  He's pretty young, and I just couldn't do it to him.  You have to build up to that sort of thing slowly - starting with seeing me cleaning (I do get quite messy and sweaty) then moving on to me in a housecoat waiting for my coffee, then me in sweat pants and a shirt two sizes too small, then finally the whole t-shirt / undie "look."  It's all a matter of conditioning.

I was reading the news this morning and in a story about some drug busts, they used the term "...netted a slew of drugs and weapons..." which pleased me to no end.  Oh sure, I was happy they got a 'slew' of drugs and weapons off the street, but I was more pleased that they used the word "slew" to indicate a bunch of something.  That word in that context is just not used that much anymore.  I also am pleased when I hear the term "..all in one fell swoop..."  My 14 year old used that a few weeks ago, and I asked him to repeat himself as I was so amazed he even knew it to use it. 

The High School band got all A's at their MSBOA event on Wednesday night.  My son called me when they were near our town so I could head in and pick him up.  If the band does well, I do enjoy getting to the parking lot early to hear their return.  You can hear them screaming out the windows of the buses long before you see the buses.  The bus drivers take a 'victory' run through our town so the kids can scream and woot.  I shed a few tears when I heard the far off shoutings and wootings.  I am very happy for the kids. Their last invitational is this Saturday, then the come back home to perform for the town at a local elementary school.  (They have a contest every year where you buy tickets and if you win the drawing, the band will play at your house.  I have wanted to win that SO MUCH and try SO HARD to win.  The people who purchased the winning ticket were from out of town, so the band can't perform for them as it states it's just for 'in town' performances, so the people donated the performance to our community.  Nice of them and all, but it would have sounded so much better IN MY YARD.)  Sigh. 

We had some storms here in Michigan last night.  The tornado sirens went off once around 10 p.m., so I herded my son downstairs to wait it out.  You just never know.  For the most part, the storms were to our east and west with a strip of clear sky right above us.  My youngest was out taking pictures around 6 p.m. last night as the storms were building up - several of them I will force you to view at this time!  View them!  I command it! 

October 22, 2007 - Last week was a very long week...I am glad it's over, but that just means one more week gone from life, so why was I wishing it would go so fast?  Sigh.  Now we do it all again this week.  The cycle keeps going.  Big wheels keep on turning...to everything, turn turn turn...the wheels on the bus go round and round. 

My husband got rambunctious this weekend and decided we needed a new kitchen sink. We did need a new sink, but I don't know what possessed him to decide that this was the weekend it was going to happen.   The sink set up was very ancient.  I am not even sure how they pieced together the plumbing underneath - it almost looked like someone robbed the graves of monstrous machinery of the late 1800s.  So, anyway - I have a new cool sink and my husband is sore from head to toe and should probably be shot to put him out of his misery. (After a certain age, some body parts just don't move in the direction they used to.) What he planned to be a few hour job took approx. 18 hours.  Oy!  Below are before and after pics.  'Twas the plumbing that took forever -the counter and sink went in like butter.  I like it because I got to pick the counter top (it's called 'sand crystals' and the sink itself is a type of sandy granite color.)  Of course, if you put in a new sink and bit of counter, you HAVE to PAINT the whole kitchen. That is my new chore.   I think I'll go pick out paint this weekend.  Currently it's a Spongebob Yellow color...I think I'll tone that down a bit.

Here is a cute shot of my boys.  They were upstairs playing "Halo 3" (or whatever you call that game where you blow people up at random for no good reason) when my daughter came over.  They greeted her out of one of the new upstairs window.  (You can see that the siding is almost to the top now of that side of the house!) 

October 30, 2007 - OK, so... if you are going to change your husband's vitamin brand, make sure that you are physically sound first yourself...Oy.  He suddenly became very active and manly and all wanting to build stuff and beat his chest and club things over the head with a stick...mainly build stuff.  

My husband decided I needed all new cupboards to go with my all new sink.  If you put up all new cupboards, you either have to stain them or paint them.  (That is not the job of the installer, mind you.  That's MY job.)  I started Saturday around 2 p.m. painting the kitchen ceiling and cupboards, and finished about 5:30 a.m. on Sunday.  I was sore and stiff and tired.  When I woke up at 11 a.m. or so after a couple hour nap, I realized how many spots I had missed on the ceiling, so I repainted the ceiling.  Of course, by then I didn't care if there was a drop sheet on the floor, so Sunday evening I was on my hands and knees scrubbing paint off the floor.  All in all, it was a weekend that only Ben Gay himself could have planned.

I've never had countertop space in this house but now I do.  I am excited about that.  This Thanksgiving will be the first time I don't have improvise pie dough.  I mean, I can just roll it out like a human on a counter top!  In the past, if you caught me making pie dough you would think I was playing Twister with myself. 

This Saturday is the Holiday Parade in Kalamazoo.  (ALREADY!!)  Both daughter and youngest son march in the parade.  Mind you, the WMU band isn't playing Christmas music.  I mean, I like their fight song and all, but this is a parade with Santa in it.  Come on.  Give me "Winter Wonderland" or "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" or something.  (For some reason, I just assumed Santa was a Notre Dame fan).  My son's band is the band right before Santa who always ends the parade.   A position of honor in my book...as long as they are not following a bunch of horses...

Last week was my son's indoor marching concert.  It was a hoot.  I started filming the drum line at the very beginning of the concert and then the kids started streaming through the auditorium from the upper back level through the crowd and they started playing our school fight song.  I completely forgot I was filming, I got so excited.  I stood up and clapped (which is what one does during the fight song) and it wasn't until I sat down that I realized the camera was still going.  Hahahaha.  I showed my son when we got home the choppy film of the camera swinging from my arm as I clapped. "So what was that all about 'Little Miss Tourette's with the camera' - Geez, Mom!"  I told him that for 35 years now I have been programmed to stand and clap and get excited over our school fight song so I completely forgot I was filming. "Man, geez - Mom!  Land eventually, will you?"  Hahahahaha. 

I was at the pharmacy last week to pick up my pills and while I was waiting at the counter, I saw the coolest thing ever.  "Oh Man!" I squealed out loud.  "These are by far the coolest things I've ever seen!" I proclaimed to anyone in earshot.  They were magnifying glasses that were framed in wild colors and paisley patterns and tie dye prints.  I grabbed one and was adoring it.  "How awesome!" I told the clerk when she came to ring me up.  Then I realized how sad it was to get all excited about a device that aids in viewing printed material because I'm getting so old I can't see small stuff.  "Damn, I'm old!" I told her.  "You and me both, sister!" she said with a smile.

November 8, 2007 - Oh my stars, it's been forever since I updated.  I don't like updating if I don't have anything clever or witty to say and that seems to be my constant mental state lately.  My brain has been on sabbatical.  I have bursts of wanting to blog, but it goes away as soon as it pops into my mind.  Lucky you!

I just got back from taking my youngest to Jazz Band.  (Jazz band starts and hour before normal school does, and he has it twice a week.)  He decided to join the band late in the season. He didn't want to join prior to now as he hates getting up early. I wasn't going to argue as I'm his transportation, and hey - less driving for me and all.  He decided to join now because this band only has one trombone player and he knows the need for more than one trombone in a good band.  (Or so he's been brainwashed to believe.)  I encourage participation in musical activities, so how can you say no to someone who wants to get up at 5:30 and go play music?  You just can't say no... I am amazed that on Jazz band days, he wakes up on his own accord.  Normally the routine to get the boy out of bed starts with beating on the ceiling with a wooden stick before screaming his name up the vent and finally using a large cattle prod and sledge hammer.  

When I got back, Muffy the Great - keeper of the grounds and chief male cat was in my parking spot to greet me. He is a good darned cat, but when it comes to cars he has not fear. (He's been hit by a few in his day - twice that we know of.  We almost lost him after the one SUV/Cat incident a few years back, but the couple that hit him was kind enough to bring him up to the door and let us know they had smushed him.)  If I were Muffy, my thoughts would be "cars = pain" but when he sees our vehicles, he stands directly in the path of them.  Normally we have to get out and move him as by that time he's wallowing in the dirt in front of the car and spread eagle as if he's going to take a nap.  Why?  Maybe he wants to die.  Maybe he's begging us to put him out of his misery.  (I just think he got hit one too many times to begin with and has poor judgement.) 

The Kalamazoo Holiday parade was marvelous. Two balloons lost body parts right out of the step off point.  Frosty lost his hat and Odie the Dog lost an ear - but other than that, it rocked.   I believe the local weather people and news anchors that were in the parade now had personal restraining orders against me as I got quite excited to see them.  I go nuts with parades.  I love parades.  Not just the bands, but the fact you have people lobbing candy at you at speeds that could put an eye out.  The whole 'thrill' of the parade gets to me.  My daughter's WMU Bronco band marched (and I believe her sarcastic remark afterwards was, "Gee, Mom, were you there?" because as she went past me all she heard was her name being chanted over and over.)  Then my son's high school band was the band that played in Santa.  My oldest son got film of that event.  I laugh at myself.  I'm all screaming and jumping up and down, then you see me wander off to hug my daughter and her friend that joined us, then I'm back to the parade jumping up and down and then I see Santa.  I let everyone in the greater tri-state area know I saw Santa, too!  (The little kids around me stare at me then check where the nearest adult is. My son's comment that could be heard on the film was, "Ah, Mom's in her own little zone...")  I must admit I didn't get hyper about the parade until we were all in the car on the way up.  I wondered at one point if by chance one of the radio stations (that normally plays Christmas music from Thanksgiving to Christmas) would be playing it that day, and I tuned that station in and they were playing Christmas music!  Woot.  I got quite excited at that point. I believe the boys in the car knew they were doomed from the start. 

The house is done! Woot. All the siding is up.  I can't believe how different it looks! My husband continues to upgrade the inner part as he put a ceiling in the laundry room and shelves all over the place.  Next big project in the three days prior to Thanksgiving is for him to replace the bath tub. Oy. I remember the last time he did that - it was a week long project where I learned many new types of swear words.  I am not looking forward to this.  He is, however, a bit 'changed' as of late - more patient and willing to read directions and ask for help and such. We'll see how this goes.

Hmmmm, anything else exciting happen as of late?  Got my mammogram on November 1st.  I don't mind those - I have larger breasts, and they've been shut into press doors and climbed on by small children, so mammograms don't really hurt me.  I was in and out in 20 minutes. Had my annual 'poke and prod' and blood work done before that.  My doctor put me on Synthroid as my thyroid numbers were out of whack.  It might be the 'placebo' effect of it - but I have slept much better since starting the thyroid meds.  I am not complaining one bit about that. 

November 12, 2007 - I never cease to amaze myself.  I'm not bragging, mind you.  I'm just in awe of my 'duh' phases at times.  I think the 'duh' comes in closer waves as I've gotten older. 

Yesterday evening was my daughter's indoor marching band concert at the college's Miller Auditorium.  The band plays every halftime show they've done during the season, and it was just amazing. They memorize each show and it stays with them enough through the whole season to play to us in a packed auditorium.  Awesome.  It is - just awesome.  No other words can describe it. 

A beautiful venue, Miller Auditorium.  I have fond memories associated with Miller.  Miller is where I got to see the Boston Pops IN PERSON several years back, which to this day remains one of the COOLEST THINGS EVER in my life.  (Right up there with giving birth three times.)  Miller is also where I saw my first ballet, 'The Nutcracker,' back in 1978 with my friend Tim and his family.  (Not that my feelings about a specific venue is important;  I just wanted to reassure myself I could still process memories and information from my brain correctly this morning, which I know I can, because not only did I see the Nutcracker ballet in 1978, I can remember that it also the FIRST time I wore mascara in public and I worried about it the whole time because I thought it looked funny and I felt odd.  See, my brain does work!  Take that!  I can remember and THINK!) 

Last night, however, was a different story.  Following the magnificent band concert that rocked and sounded so crisp and professional it brought me to tears several times, I took the family to dinner.  Getting off of the campus to a street that would take us to our destination was a hoot.  My daughter and son were trying to guide me through the roundabout to get out, but with several people from the back seat giving directions and the mere fact I was just confused by a simple roundabout, I went 'straight' when I should have kept circling.  I corrected myself by tuning around in a parking lot and getting back in the loop to get out off of the loop where I should in the first place. I was teased by my family quite a bit for the small altercation with the car, but it was kind of funny.  I mean, come on - a roundabout?  Where I comes from, there is just corners and curves, not no stinkin' roundabouts!

After dinner, on the way back to drop my daughter off at her car in the Miller parking ramp, we came to the street where I had to turn left to get back to campus.  (By now it's slightly foggy outside and it's drizzling rain. This has no bearing whatsoever on this story, but I am throwing it out there for you weather nuts. I suppose I could have just started this paragraph off with "It was a dark and stormy night" but that's way too dramatic.)  The lights to go straight turned green, but the light to turn left remained red.  (As my husband was kind enough to point out at the time I was turning illegally, it was a SOLID red - not a blinking 'turn when it's safe' kind of red...)  I had it in my head that I could turn left on a red for some reason.  Not even so much 'turn left on red = good' as I was thinking that 'gee, if it's safe - I can go, right?' sort of thing.  DUH!!  (We had taunted my daughter terribly when she had done this not too long ago coming out of a store parking lot. Don't dish it out if you can't take it yourself when YOU do it, is all I got to say about that, because eventually, you WILL do it!) 

I joked that there would be a police officer in the oncoming lane and watched my rearview for the lights.   I deserved a ticket for that stupid move.  My oldest son turned to my youngest and said, "OK, what Mom just did is NOT what you are supposed to do when driving..."  No police lights appeared and we made our way back to campus.  Again, the dreaded roundabout.  My oldest son and daughter were kindly giving direction to me, which were clear enough, but I was still a bit startled and dazed by my move back at the red light.  I missed the little off shoot street and we circled a while until I came back up to that street.  Finally, we make it back to the parking lot where I was able to deliver my daughter safely to her car.  I'm sure the boys wanted to go with her badly, as they still faced another 1/2 hour trip home with Mom and things weren't going so well.

I did manage to get back out on to the street that would lead us to the street that would take us to the highway, but seriously, by then I had lost my sense of direction since the first mis-turn on the the roundabout that evening.  I swore I was heading north and I needed to turn left to get back to the highway.  I was in fact heading south and I was so in the wrong lane to turn right.  Also, I had parked on the tracks under the red light.  (They have double lights - one before the Amtrak rails and one right after it.  I was sort of in the middle since I stopped when I realized I was beaten by the dark and my lack of directional sense.)

Since I was on the train track and being reminded constantly by my boys that many trains DO run through there, I decided in my infinite wisdom that since the other cars were stopped for the red light and no one was to my direct right that I would just pop forward off of the tracks and into the turn lane and wait for the light.  I knew the minute I did that I was pushing my luck.  I got into the next 'off the train track' position to turn right, and waited for the green light, but saw a large SUV take up a looming position behind me quite quickly.  "Is that a cop?" I asked.  The boys weren't sure - they were not turning around as they were embarrassed enough by my awesome night driving skills by now that they were looking for a bus stop to bail out at. "I'm pretty sure that's an officer..." I laughed to myself.  I have never received a ticket in my 47 years on earth.  I had a feeling this was my lucky night.

We were all laughing when the light turned green and the police lights came on.  "Yep, thought so..." I said as I signaled to pull over, oddly enough by a bus stop, so I suppose the boys could have bailed on me if they wanted to.  I got out my license and my proof of insurance and registration even before he got to the window.  He scanned us all with his high intensity beam of light as we were all laughing.  I would be scared too, if I were a police officer and had a car full of people laughing. "Ma'am, the reason I pulled you over tonight is because from my point of view, you ran a red light..." he started to explain, but I nervously broke in and said, "Oh, I know, sir - I stopped on the tracks when the light turned red and was worried about trains as I was being told repeatedly that trains DO RUN THROUGH THERE A LOT and I am a bit discombobulated as to where I am when it comes to north and south and all, as I just dropped my daughter off at the Miller ramp after a fantastic band concert and wonderful dinner by the way, mind you, but I'm just a bit confused as to where I am right now trying to get off this campus but since no one was to my right I thought I'd be safe to navigate there so as no trains could come and kill us..."  He listened to me ramble on a minute, then scanned us all again with the flashlight.  We were still laughing on and off. 

"Any outstanding warrants or tickets on this?" he asked, while tapping on my license with the flashlight.  "No sir, as a matter of fact, this will be my first ticket EVER!" I announced proudly and with gusto.  He took my info back to his SUV and the boys just had a hay day bombarding Mom.  "She's finally gone over the edge!" my youngest proclaimed.  "Oh, come on you guys!  You've older males have both gotten tons of tickets and I've never gotten any!" I defended myself.  Still, we laughed as it was kind of funny in a nervous sort of way. 

When the officer returned, he handed me my paperwork and license, and said in a benevolent voice, "Ma'am - I'm not issuing you a ticket tonight, just giving you a warning.  From my point of view, you ran a red light.  However, I didn't know you were sitting on the tracks.  Most people would stop before the tracks behind that big white line that marks the tracks clearly.  Please be careful in the future and drive safely.  Once my lights go off, please use extreme care to get back onto the roadway." 

We were once again on our way back home.  I tolerated the humorous comments all the way back to the house, as I had them coming.  I do believe, however, that next time I'm letting someone else drive...

November 13, 2007 - I hope all of you star gazers out there have had a chance to sneak out while it's good and dark and clear and see Comet Holmes.  It's been very visible to the naked eye for weeks now.  It's kind of a fuzzy blob in the sky, as if someone had coughed up on a black computer screen, but it's there and you know it's a comet so that makes it cool.  It's in the Perseus constellation area in the sky if that helps you find it.  You can also look for the "W" looking Cassiopeia constellation that kind of looks like it was written by a drunk person, and the comet is in that general direction. I've mentioned before I'm trying to teach myself the constellations and their names.  I think the Greeks or who ever named them had a much clearer view of the sky than I do even though I'm out here in the "country."  I still get lots of bleeding city lights from north and south and east and west and of course the yard lights up and down the street.  Example, I can find Mars and see the legs and arms of the Gemini twins, but I can never see their heads, so as far as I'm concerned Gemini is headless.  I do appreciate the fact that the constellations are 'stick figures' as that helps identify them.  Simplify!   Go Greeks! 

Of course my interpretation of stick figures sometimes varies from what has been established by the star gazer community over the centuries.  The first time I "saw" Canis Major I decided it looked like a dog sniffing someone's butt, but on line inquiry will tell you it's a hunting dog belonging to Orion, who's constellation is nearby. Still, he could be sniffing Orion's butt I suppose.  There is also a rabbit looking constellation called Lepus and it's cute. Maybe Canis Major is is sniffing the rabbits butt?  Hmmmm.  Something to ponder.  There are also two constellations that are long and snaking - Draco the Dragon, which I think should have been named Spermus since it looks like single sperm on a mission and Hyrda, which should have been named Spermus Major.  Of course, I'm sure centuries ago people had not seen what sperm looked like in microscopes so their choice of names are good, too.  I don't know why I care what the names of the constellations are.  I can't use them as directional aides because I don't understand how they rotate yet in the sky, so I could be lost at sea and say, "Hey, that's the constellation that looks like it's sniffing someone's butt!  However, we're still hopelessly lost..." I suppose the night sky is the ultimate roundabout to navigate.

I took my son to Jazz band just now, and think I will warn all parents that have children who walk to school in the dark to make sure you glue reflective stuff to their tennis shoes and backpacks while they sleep as a precaution. (Remember, people like ME are driving those streets!)   Since High School kids tend to dress in black anyway and if they choose to walk in the street in the dark, they are taking their own life into their hands.  The only thing missing from their ensemble is a bright red target for cars to aim at. Geez.   The one thing that saved the gothic looking pair in the street this morning was the amount of metal rings and hooky things hanging from one of the kid's pants as those reflected my headlights.  GET OFF MY LAWN, KIDS, AND GET A CLUE!   Being all black and dark and ninja stealthy is cool unless it's 6 a.m. in the morning and there are people on the street behind the wheel of vehicles who have not had their full dose of coffee yet.  Remember that.

The wise and powerful Sandy has spoken.

November 17, 2007 - I just wrote to my cousin and told him a fact of life he probably was not aware of...if you get new siding for your house, immediately every bird in the lower half of the state will ingest purple berries and then defecate on that new siding and put off flying south JUST to eat more berries and poop MORE.  It's just a fact.  No way to deny it.  My house looks like it was defeated and shown no mercy during a game of paintball .

I am defrosting my freezer right now, so I have time to type on line while I wait for the final chunks to drop from the upper corners.  Aren't you all the lucky ones?

Before I start ranting about life in the next few paragraphs, I wanted to quote a line from the Ricky Nelson song 'Garden Party' from 1972..."You see, ya can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself..." (Then the song goes off in to a lot of 'lat n doo dah dahhs' after that, but I just wanted to state that line for future reference.)

First of all, I was never really sure what the difference is between a Republican and a Democrat, so I researched it this morning.  I have Republican friends and Democratic friends.  I guess I was never quite sure what I was, to be honest, because all I know is what I know - to be honest and right.  So if I know it's honest and right and it happens to fall into either a Republican category or a Democratic type category, then more power to me, aye?  

But I digress...after all that research on line, I'm still thinking that if it's right, it's right, and it doesn't matter if it's an elephant or donkey type thing. 

I guess what I really want to know is which party or group started the whole "politically correct" thing anyway?  Just stop already.  It's gone too far, OK?  Everyone will offend everyone always.  It's a fact of life, just like the birds eating berries to excess and have explosive diarrhea on my new siding. 

Example:  I read where they asked Santa's not to use the term "HO HO HO" as it might scare children and offend people. DUH!  Of course a burst of 'HO HO HO' is going to scare any one year old child that was thrust on to the lap of a stranger who is huge, hairy, and laughing uncontrollably.  DUH.  All of my kids have pictures of themselves screaming in terror while sitting on Santa's lap.  It's required by law, I believe.  If you DON'T want your kid to scream in terror on a stranger's lap, don't put him there.  If 'HO HO HO' offends anyone in any particular trade, I would just consider it free advertising if I were a HO.  "See, even Santa recommends us!" I would claim with pride...

Sigh.  It's just too much. You can't touch anyone because it's harassment.  You can't tell a joke because it might offend someone.  The only time this human race will be able to say it is fair and good to all types of humans and would never utter a word of cruelty to offend anyone will be the day AFTER the asteroid hits and obliterates our species. 

Sorry, had to vent. 

Last Saturday when I was working in Grand Rapids, I got a phone call on my cell phone from a number local to where I live. I answered to hear a little girl on the other end asking me to "come home" and she "missed Mommy."  In the background I could hear what sounded like four or five other little kids.  "Honey, I'm not your Mommy..." I claimed.  "Is your Daddy home?" I asked.  She handed the phone to Evan, and I knew this as she said, "Evan, Mom wants you" and Evan got on the phone and also said he wanted me to come home.  "I'm not your Mom!   Is there an adult there with you? I asked.  "Grandpa's in the yard!" Evan responded.  "Can you go get Grandpa?" I begged.  The connection went 'click' and the kids were gone.  I shook my head and laughed and went back to work. 

Ten minutes later the phone rings again.  "Mommy...(sobs and more sobs)...Evan is hurting me!" the little girl cried.  "Tell Evan to stop hurting you, and I'm not your Mom!" I said.   She did tell Evan to stop, but then the phone got handed to an even younger kid who babbled on about "Mom" something but I couldn't understand what she was saying.   "I'm not your Mommy...Give the phone to Grandpa!" I pleaded to whoever was on the other end now. "Grandpa in yard..."  The phone once again went 'click' and the kids were gone. 

By then I'm wondering if Grandpa is dead in the yard and maybe I should be calling 911 about then.  The kids didn't sound in a panic - they just sounded like a herd of little kids wanting their Mom to come home from work.  I was busy so I soon forgot about the whole thing. 

About one hour later the phone rings again.  I answered it by saying, "I'm not your Mom!"  It was the kids all vying for the phone to talk to 'Mom' but this time I could hear an older adult male voice in the background.  "Give the phone to GRANDPA!" I said in a firm voice.  "Grandpa, Mom wants to talk to you!" the kids all hollered.   An older gentleman got on the phone and said, "Yep, we just got back from Three Rivers..." I stopped him and said, "Sir, I not the kid's Mom.  I'm not sure how they got my number..." The phone went 'click' and after that I did not hear from 'my kids' again. 

It dawned on my later that I might have damaged those poor kids by repeatedly saying, "I'm not your Mom..."  That is just not news you want to hear over the phone...

November 26, 2007 - Ah, it snowed a bit today, and as we all know, that makes Sandy very happy.  They had snow advisories posted for several hours, but now they've cancelled them.  Meteorologist are big teases. Sigh.

I heard a Christmas song today at work by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass.  That brought back some memories, boy howdy.  Years ago, when Tony Orlando and Dawn came out with "Tie a Yellow Ribbon" I remember asking for that record* for Christmas. (*For the younger crowd - 'record' was a round piece of vinyl played at 33 and 1/3 speed on a turntable device that had a needle.  Not unlike a CD spray painted black and hammered out to three times the size...and old records could be used at the 78 speed to jettison plastic army men at high speeds for riotous hours of fun, but I digress.)  I didn't get the record I asked for, but my Mom did get me a Herb Alpert album with that song on it.  I felt so 'let down' because it wasn't what I wanted, but made a fuss about it nonetheless on Christmas Day.  Turns out I really LOVED that record.  I adored Herb Alpert's version of songs.  I didn't suffer one bit nor did I miss Tony Orlando in the least bit.  Moral of the story, just because it isn't Tony Orlando, listen anyway...you just might like it.

Thanksgiving was marvelous.  I had pretty much everything done prior to Thursday, so on Thursday it was just the main meal to fix.  My Mother in law and sister in law came for dinner.   It was a hoot.  The kids were very entertaining and it was nice to sit back and laugh at them and enjoy their conversation and not be the 'entertainer' for a change.  The kids did the dishes and I took a nap. 

I put up Christmas decorations on Saturday and Sunday.  Nobody helps decorate anymore and I have decided that it's OK because I would decorate even if it were just me and I were all alone.   When I forced my husband to drag down the boxes of decorations from the attic, he reminded me I threw away our old scruffy four foot fake Christmas tree last year.   "I did?" I asked, as I couldn't really remember.  (However, somewhere in the back of my mind was one vague reference to this that my brain obviously forgot to file under the correct heading, so I didn't doubt him in the least bit, but I just didn't remember the actual act of pitching the old tree.)  Once we crawled around the attic, it was a firm "YES" to the fact we were missing a Christmas tree.  We got in the car and went to the local Meijers and got another one.   This was a cheap 6 foot tree that was pre-lit and strongly resembles a pine tree in a Charlie Brown sort of way and isn't that what really counts?  Apparently I had also thrown out the faded glass balls we had for 27 years as well last year, so there was one more trip to the store to get new shiny glass balls because we all know a tree ain't a tree without good shiny balls.

So, while I'm writing this, my son comes downstairs and asks me, "What is going on outside?"   "Outside?" I ask, not knowing what was indeed going on outside, so we both looked out the window together. There were three fire trucks, a ton of volunteer vehicles and flashing lights all over directly across the street.  "Holy Crap!" I announced to my son, "When did those guys get there?"   "I'm askin' you, Mom!" he reminded me.  I didn't hear a THING.  This house is a cement block of silence to the outside world, I swear. 

We shut ourselves in the bathroom and turned off the lights and opened the window so we could hear what was going on.  We saw someone unload two ATVs off of a trailer and take off to the back of the field directly across the road and one of the P.A. systems on one of the fire trucks stated, "This is the Fire Department.  Stay Put.  We are on the way."  So, after watching countless hours of Court TV, I felt confident enough to tell my son that someone was either lost or hurt in the woods.  "Duh!" he replied, confirming my thoughts.  I was almost relieved because then I knew it wasn't Grandma next door that was in need of medical assistance. Phew.  I was sad that someone could be lost in the woods on this cold icky wet evening though, especially when drunk hunters are on the loose with loaded weapons.

My son and I hung out the window for quite a bit until we saw the neighbors go to the road.  By then my husband kicked us out of the bathroom so he could get ready for work, so we decided to get out and be gawking bystanders.  One of our neighbors is in the Public Safety business himself, so we were sure that if he was out there he could get the scoop on what was going on.  (He did know the scoop - a person was stuck in a swamp out in the woods and couldn't get out...God bless cell phones.)

To back track a bit, on Saturday a couple of deer were running and jumping over fences to our east and after a bit I could see why...they were being chased by a doggie.  The dog lost them momentarily and went south along the pine line after they veered off and ran west across our yards to cross the road to head for the woods.  However, the doggie soon found the scent and here he came - tearing across the road in front of two cars and I flinched and covered my face because he almost got hit.  He was going to get those deer if it killed him.   It wasn't long after that there was a car pulling over and a person in full hunter's orange ran in the field in search of the dog.  I felt so bad for the guy.  I have sent my kids off in search of Kia and Jake many times and knew how he must feel.  (Today there were even flyers in our mailbox with a picture of the lost dog and a phone number to call if we saw the dog.)

So, I tell you about the doggie and the deer because it turns out the guy stuck in the swamp is the doggie's owner, and he's stuck in the swamp because his dog is stuck in the swamp.  My neighbor Denise said a prayer and we all stood together waiting on news, cracking jokes to ease tension, and watching the coming and going of the volunteer fire peoples.  A group of them also went down to the next street over to try from that side of the woods to get to the person. As of 10:30 p.m. the fire trucks are still outside and I too have said a prayer because last we were updated before coming in from the cold they still couldn't get to the person because the rescuers would start sinking in to the swamp after getting so many feet away.  I just saw another batch of fire men go back on an ATV to the woods.  Oh my.  :(  If we were cold just standing there for 30 minutes, can you imagine the poor person in the swamp and the poor dog?!!

Since I couldn't sleep with all the excitement, I waited up and watched out the window with the dogs (but I didn't get nose marks on the windows as some unnamed canines did, cripes!)  Around 11:30 they brought the man up on one of the ATVs and they stripped him of his clothes right out there on the street and wrapped him up in a puffy blanket looking thing on the stretcher.  When they lifted him into the ambulance you could see his bare feet sticking out. That poor dude must have been just frozen.  Plus, there was a dog walking with the group of firemen, but I can't tell you if it was the 'lost' doggie or not or a tracking dog.  I sure hope it was the lost doggie. 

November 28, 2007 - One of the coolest things happened to me tonight...  The "guy stuck in the swamp" from the above entry wrote me an email to update me!  How awesome!  His wife also sent me an update and an aerial map showing exactly where this poor man was in the swamp.   (Their neighbor told them I had blogged about the incident, and their neighbor happens to be a lady I used to work with, and she was told about it by another friend at work who had read the diary then came down to hear me act out the incident in person as I am very entertaining when telling a story or so I've been told, and that friend told our other friend who called these people and really - it IS a small world after all...and all this time I just thought it was a song...)

Anyway, I can't tell these people how much the updates meant to me;  I am sitting here crying with joy. He is bruised and sore and has frost bite on his left foot, but he's OK and back to work already!  The doggie is home and fine as well!  HURRAY!  (If you two are reading this - THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LETTING ME KNOW!!) 

How awesome is it for those people who don't know me from a hole in the ground to let me know all turned out well?  Contented sigh.  I am baking those people cookies and getting doggie biscuits for Jack the dog.  If I ever see Jack cruise by my house again, I'm gonna tackle him and hold him until they get here! 

Happy Sigh. I guess those emails made me happy because it shows that humans can be kind and thoughtful just when I was feeling like "we" as a species were getting too callous, too cruel, and too stupid.  You can worry and be concerned about things you know nothing about but how often do you get confirmation from someone that it all turned out OK?  We worry about the stories we hear on the news and scenes we see on the streets in our lives, but we rarely hear the end to the story that we only glimpsed in passing yet were concerned about nonetheless.  How wonderful it is to hear the end to a story you worried about, and the story ends well...

December 3, 2007 - Baby, it's cold outside!   Please note the following sentence for historical reference:  Sandy bought herself and actual winter coat - Not just a jersey style coat - a WINTER COAT with insulation and stuff.  I, queen of all things frozen and flake-like have decided that I indeed need a winter coat because lately I've been feeling 'cold' when the weather is cold.  I thought I'd never see the day come. It's fluffy and red and puffy and warm.  I normally don't do 'winter' apparel as I am such a winter geek. However, this year I'm beginning to feel the temperature internally when it's cold outside.  "Age - oomph - God God Y'all - What is it good for?  Absolutely nothin' - say it again..."

Yesterday morning it was raining/freezing so there was a slight covering of ice on everything.  Plus, there was mass amounts of wind, so my outside world sounded like a large bowl of Rice Krispies.  It was pretty awesome - Snap, Crackle, and Pop!  This morning it's blowing and there is a coating of snow.  (A piss poor effort on Mother Nature's part, if you ask me.)  At least it's snow in some form, so I won't write letters yet in protest to my Congressman.

Our friend at work has a daughter (Casey) and her boyfriend (Robert) who started a hot dog place.  YUM!  They worked hard all summer to get an old restaurant building up and running.   I do love a good hot dog.  I took the family there after my son's Holiday Parade on Saturday.  It's just a little place for now, but the hot dogs are REAL Vienna beef hot dogs.  I am one of those people who LOVES hot dogs. (The first time I think I even had a hot dog was when I was 12 years old at the cook out for 4H.  I am not sure if we just didn't do hot dogs at home when I was little, or the hot dog(s) I had at the 4H BBQ were just so good I remember it that way...Diane, my piano teacher, gave the BBQ at her house, and I can't tell you how delicious those HOT DOGS WERE!  That started my love affair with hot dogs...but I digress...) If you are in the Portage area - you must try a Chicago Dogs.  They have other sandwiches, too.  If you're going for fast food, you may as well have some flavor to it! 

This is my little tree this year.  My $29 dollar Charlie Brown fake tree.  I love my little tree.  I also got a timer for my outdoor lights which are supposed to activate when dusk arrives.  However, if you buy a seven dollar timer you get a seven dollar timer.  I have to go out every night and shine on a flashlight on it for a second, then turn it off to activate the darned thing.   It's almost funny  - it needs 'fake' daylight to know it's dark.

I did a survey sort of thing on email...the kind you get a lot this time of year, and sent it out to some friends.  I will post it here only because it's filler and I don't have a lot to say this morning. :)

Welcome to the Christmas edition of getting to know your friends.Okay, here's what you're supposed to do, and try not to be a SCROOGE!!! Just copy (not forward) this entire email and paste into a new e-mail that you can send. Change all the answers so that they apply to you.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?  Paper!  I like shiny paper.  Ooooooo...look at the shiny paper!

2. REAL OR FAKE TREE?   I have three dogs, three cats, so of course new fake tree.  The tinsel is real, though - so the pet poop it pretty 

3. When do you put up the tree? The day after Thanksgiving

4. When do you take the tree down?   The day after Christmas...(we have a really small house.  The tree is taking up valuable human space.)

5. Do you like eggnog?   Sometimes - you gots to be in the mood for raw eggs in bovine juice

6. Favorite gift received as a child?  When I was 18, my Dad got me a Grover doll.  Dad just didn't do stuff like that...

7. Do you have a nativity scene?  Yes!  I am missing the camels.

8. Hardest person to buy for?   Now that the kids are almost 'adults' or are adults, the KIDS!  No more Polly Pockets or Hot Wheels :(

9. Easiest person to buy for?   Anyone under the age of five.

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?   I am sure I have complained about this a lot over the years, but right at this moment, I can't remember the 'worst'...maybe a few times Todd got me something that was so totally not me it made me upset that he even bothered and I thought about killing him, but other than that...

11. Mail or email Christmas cards?  I like Snail Mail. 

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?  It's a Wonderful Life! 

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? When ever there is extra money

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?  I have shared my presents.... as sometimes I am so blessed with so much and  I have things other people need or want and can't get on their own.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?   Anything in the category of FOOD :)

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Must have colored and some blinky one, but colored, a must.

17. Favorite Christmas song?  SLEIGH RIDE - instrumental version.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?  Home

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeers?  Heck yeah!  You know Dancer and Prancer, Spritzer and Nixon, Moppet and Pukin', Dahlmer and Blitz Krieg

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?    Angel

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?   Christmas Morn!  The longer I can torture this family, the better!  WE WAIT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE.  I make coffee and poop first....

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? <--WHEN YOUR FONT TURNS COLOR AND YOU CAN'T TURN IT BACK!

23. What I love most about Christmas?  The actual feeling of MAGIC in the air and SNOW and the pretty shiny lights and the cool songs and the fact you can act goofy in love or full of the joy of life this time of year and most policemen will attribute this to the holiday and only issue a warning....

December 10, 2007 - This weekend I must have gotten 25 weather alerts from the local T.V. station that I signed up to get such alerts.   It makes me smile a little.  I think after the whole Katrina Hurricane tragedy, that they weather service has gone a bit to the other extreme...warning us in the event of clouds, ducks crossing the road, dog shedding, etc.  They are not calling wolf - they are just making sure we're safe.  I always read the newest one when I check my email.  (The others are superfluous.)  We got a coating of ice over the weekend, not as bad as the first 80 weather alerts eluded to, but enough that the side roads will be a bit slick.  We have more sleet and rain headed our way from Texas tonight, apparently, and I'd like to thank them for the early Christmas present.

I put up those icicle lights on the front of the house because I like lights, and then Mother Nature has to go and one up me and put on REAL icicles!   It's always a competition with her.  I didn't put the lights up to hang from my new shingles like I should have, because they are just that - NEW shingles and frankly I couldn't bring myself to shove a plastic hook into them.  I did have the intestinal fortitude to shove siding hooks in the new siding, however.  For some reason that didn't seem so violent. 

I have to take my youngest in to the doctor for wart removal on his foot this afternoon to get that taken care of before the end of the year when our new insurance kicks in and my current family doctor doesn't participate with our new insurance.  I have a recheck tomorrow morning on my thyroid numbers, so I have a fasting blood test at 8 a.m.  Then they will try to squeeze in some cyst removal (as I get sebaceous cysts all the time on my noggin.)  THEN my youngest has a "well child visit" on the 31st and after that I will have to find a doctor within network.  Sigh.  I love my family doctor.  I dread being without her, but I'm sure there are many local competent doctors who participate with our new BCBS Community POOP or PPO or whatever it is.

December 13, 2007 -If you've ever gotten Little Caesars pizza after work and driven home with it in the winter with no windows open, you know that your car will smell like Little Caesars pizza about as long as it takes uranium to reach it's half life.  I sprayed my car last night with smelly cinnamon scented Glade so I could take my mother in law to my son's concert without making her crave pizza, but this morning when I went to warm up my car it smelled like scented Little Caesars pizza.  That stuff embeds itself in every fiber available.  I believe my family doctor calls any pizza like that a "heart attack in a box" but it's so delicious.

The concert last night was marvelous. Contented Sigh.  Both jazz bands played, then the concert band and then the symphonic band.  Much holiday music and joy.  I do so enjoy the music. 

It's spitting snow this morning.  It was quite festive taking my son in to school early.  After dropping him off I sat in the school parking lot with my brights on watching the shaker ball effect for a bit until I realized the people across the street (who's front window was taking the direct hit from my bright lights) were probably not thrilled with my choice of parking.  This festive snow makes for some fine slippery spots, though.  I am finding that driving in winter weather gets more frustrating the older I get.  Going into a ditch in the dead of winter as a teenage - an adventure.  Going into a ditch at 47 years of age - a hernia or various pulled muscles. 

December 17, 2007 - Ah, I got my snow.  Not as much as we could have, but a nice layer for Christmas.  I would have to say 6 inches here.  Other places got more, to our East and North.  Still, I can't complain.  Not enough to bring us to a screeching halt, but enough to accent the Christmas lights.  The dogs love prancing in the piles and it's fun to watch them spring around in it.  I think you can hear an audible "sproing" when they are outside.

My youngest went to his first semi formal on Saturday night.  It was 'iffy' if they would have it as they had winter storm warnings out and all, but they did continue forward with it.  It was funny watching all the girls in high heels slipping around in the parking lot as we sat waiting for my son afterwards.   (But I'm cruel that way when it comes to high heels and will take joy in the errors of their ways when ever I can.  High heeled shoes should be banned from the face of the earth unless you need them to pick fruit from tall trees or get stuff off the top cupboard shelves.)  Below is a pic of my youngest with his Dad, and he's almost as tall as Dad!

My husband was wondering out loud what he could get me for Christmas when suddenly there was an abrupt sound that echoed through the house accompanied by a rolling fog bank of smoke that entwined itself around our heads like wreaths.  For a split second one would have misconstrued all of that for the ghost of Christmas Past, but we quickly narrowed it down to the fact the washing machine had burned up a bearing and was catching on fire as it was seizing up out in the laundry room.  Guess what I'm getting for Christmas? :)

December 30, 2007 - I am up at 3:30 a.m. I have reached the maximum amount of sleep a human can get and my body refuses to lay down one more minute.  I have been ill with a flu like sickness - it hit me hard Thursday night and got worse through the night.  Fever, chills - you know - the usual.  I called in on Friday as there was no way I would have been able to go to work vertically.   My husband came home from work Friday morning and was also getting sick.  So, us two big adults were down, being 'babysat' by my youngest son.  I heard him telling someone on the phone in a proud voice, "Yeah, and I'm taking care of them..."

So I've slept a LOT and suddenly this morning my body announced to my brain that if it was forced to be reclined one more minute it would explode from pooling blood in various areas.  I got up and am sipping on coffee and getting my land legs back. Sigh.  I am hoping this stuff runs it's course and is over by the New Year!  I got a flu shot when they had them at work, so I am wondering what this really is - I suppose there are various strains of the flu.  My sickness was mostly in my head/chest and all over body aches.   My husband had his mainly in his stomach and all the joys that come with a stomach type flu.  My son claims it's from eating to many vegetables, which just goes to show he's been right all along. 

My son has a 'well child visit' tomorrow at 8 a.m. and I have a visit schedules at 8:40 for myself and getting stitches out of my head from my last visit where I had a cyst removed from my head.  I will ask the doctor then what she thinks it was/is.  I was trying to squeeze in all the necessary visits to my doctor while we still had insurance she participates with.  I have thought long and hard about it, and I don't feel like I can switch doctors just because she won't participate with my insurance.  I will just pay the higher deductible and then the higher copays for out of network, I suppose.   I like my doctor.  I've been with her for YEARS and don't want to find another family doctor.  Maybe it's the fever talking, but I want to stay just where I am for now.  I won't complain about insurance either, as I'm just darned lucky I have it via work in the first place.  I'm just darned lucky I have a job in the first place.   Let's face it, I may have pooled blood in my butt, but I'm a darned lucky woman.

Christmas was wonderful.  My sister and my nieces came over for Christmas Eve, and we had a hoot.   We had lots of good food and my dear sister always makes me Jell-O.  I love Jell-O.  No one in this house will tolerate Jell-O, so on Christmas she makes me my layered red/green Jell-O combo and brings her delicious homemade shortbread and whipped cream and I make myself a Jell-O/shortbread parfait.  Yum.  Back in my day, Jell-O was used for everything.  If you were sick, you got Jell-O.  Each holiday had it's own special Jell-O dish.  Jell-O was a mainstay of the American family until I got my own American family, and they all think Jell-O is 'icky' and refuse to eat it.   Somewhere I went terribly wrong in the raising of my brood when it comes to Jell-O.

Ah, the feeling is slowly returning to my lower half.  Being upright has it's perks.  As I sit here enjoying the blood flow returning to my feet, I reflect on the year...  My daughter got to go to Toronto and play at the bowl game her college team was in...My husband burned his hand at work...my daughter fainted at the hospital while taking her Dad in for a check up on his burned hand...my 'grandson' Ziti the Beta fish passed away...my oldest son fainted at work...I had my 25th anniversary at work...our roof blew off...we got a new roof...we raised a baby bird...I got a beetle stuck in my ear...my youngest went to his first band camp up north...my youngest started high school...my fish Wadsworth died...my daughter moved into her first apartment...we got siding for the house and new windows...got to see my friend Reva from Texas...got new kitchen sink and countertops...oh my stars - so much happened in 2007.  You can sit there and think you have a boring life, but in reality a ton of stuff happens in the length of one year.

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